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Feeling Extremely TERRIBLE

Posted by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 9:19 AM
  • 3 Replies

Okay me and my 6 year old daughter just had it out this morning and I feel terrible about it. Neither one of us are Morning People. She and I butt heads in the morning when we have to get things done Last Minute and it seems Ashlyn somewhat enjoys pushing and testing me at times. So I ask her ( thinking back to last night when I couldn't recall her showing me any Math HW) if she had any Math HW assignments? She then told me a lie and said her teacher gave her something else to do in it's place ( which I knew was a lie) and she pulls out a worksheet that had absolutely no math problems on it or had anything to do with Math. So i then tell her "Okay, I think I'm gonna be checking your planner now to make sure"... As I pick up her planner and start flipping through the pages of it she goes "Oh wait a sec, I DO have math HW to DO"... then she looks at me and grins.. I then at this point am agry because we've wasted like 5 minutes of time she could have been using just to get the assignment done. When in the moring I am in no mood for jokes or monkey business especially when I haven't had my daily dose of CAFFINE. Anyhow, I sit her down in front of her math book and tell her to get busy she had now, less then 10 minutes to get her work done, hair and teeth bushed then out the door to catch her bus. She then wants to play the "It's too hard, I don't wanna do it" game she's known famous for here at home and in class. She gets lazy and cries and claims she can't do it or doesn't know how when after having explained it to her several times she still decides she doesn't want to do it and she wants YOU to do it for her. I explain things to her step by step three times, after that your on yourown. I don't DO my kid's HW for her. Anyhow, I knew she knew the answers she was just wanting to push and test me. I then loose my temper and yell at her to "GET IT DONE THE BEST SHE CAN". She then gets mad throws her book down and her pencil and refuses to do anymore work until I help her. Time's a wastin as we argue so I then TRYonce again to Help her. She then starts the "I don't know how" thing again and finally after fighting over it with her I ask her "Did you wake up without putting your brain back in again"??? I feel badly about saying that, it just came right outta my mouth out of sheer frustration. She then got upset because yesterday her teacher had given her a little plastic math ruler with easter decorations on it. ( Something that could have stayed here at home) but... Ashlyn insisted she take it with her just because her 4 year old sister had it and was playing with it. She is 3 monutes now PAST the normal time she's suppost to leave to catch her bus. I then get angry with her and yell once again at her "You don't need it, you only want it because your sister has it, it will be right here waiting for you when you get home". She then yells back at me " Nooooooooooooooo........ I WANT MY RULER, MEGAN'S GONNA TEAR IT UP, AND I WANT IT NOW".... The she plops herself down on the botom step and refuses to get up. It's then 8:18AM andher bus comes around 8:22. I get her out of here on a NORMAL morning around 8:15AM. So she's yelling at me, I'm yelling back at her I then snatch the ruler from Megan and put it in her bookbag and the push her out the front door, I'm thena t this point so mad at her that I slam the door and the dude outside walking his dog stares at me.

Now Ashlyn has a behavior disorder called ODD (Oppositional Defient Disorder). She goes to a therapist for it every 2 weeks. It's been hard, really really hard especially the past few months dealing with her. She was diagonsed with ODD when she was 3 years old. I've taken physical abuse and mental abuse from this kid and even went through a period where she was inflecting injuries on herself just to gain attention from others around her. It's been a long road for us here at home dealing with her. She was doing so good and now it's like she's heading back to old ways. I just feel badly because I've been trained by her councelor and therapist on how to handle her behavior but this morning it just became too much for me to bare. I feel horrible because I didn't resort to my correct way of handling this. :0(

by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 9:19 AM
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Replies (1-3):
mrswillie
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 9:36 AM

Parents make mistakes also.  I have a step daughter that is bi polar.  I have been take how to deal with her as well BUT remember not only are you a mom, you are human!  We all loose it once ina while.

My 13 son is a bear in the morning to get motivated so we have him do as little as possible.  he lays his clothes out the night before, makes his lunch, does his homework (which I check with the agenda) takes his shower, picks out what he is having for breakfast etc.  This helps us in the morning. 

TennesseeVols_1
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 9:52 AM

Thanks for the reply. :0) makes since to have things laid out and done before she goes to bed at night. It's just at night I stay so busy claening up after dinner, making sure everyone's had baths, and doing last minutes things before bedtime. I just kinda FORGET the important things and have them waiting for me when I get up in the morning. Mabe that's another reason why I'm so grouchy as well. It just seems like I have no time at night to get everything I need to have in order. :0( But thank you for your kind reply. I know I've ot the get things organized it's just so hard to get done when you live in total Chaos.

Quoting mrswillie:

Parents make mistakes also.  I have a step daughter that is bi polar.  I have been take how to deal with her as well BUT remember not only are you a mom, you are human!  We all loose it once ina while.

My 13 son is a bear in the morning to get motivated so we have him do as little as possible.  he lays his clothes out the night before, makes his lunch, does his homework (which I check with the agenda) takes his shower, picks out what he is having for breakfast etc.  This helps us in the morning. 


bnlvr3
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 10:02 AM

You're only human smile miniTry not to beat yourself up too hard.

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