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aggravated w/ neighbor kids

Posted by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 2:12 PM
  • 24 Replies

Hi moms,
I don't know what to do.  My son is four, and I have a nine year old daughter as well.  We have two neighbors, one has three kids the other has five.  Here lately I have a house full of kids that aren't mine.  My nerves can't handle it, that is why I stopped at two.  Kudos to those of you with more than two!!!!  I can not afford snacks and drinks for all these kids, and I can't keep worrying about who has lice and who doesn't.  My son brought lice home a while back!  I know my son needs friends.  But they are older than him kinda like they are just here to play with his stuff and make a huge mess.  I don't want to sound like the neighborhood bitch but I am not the community babysitter.  I wouldn't complain, but this happens everyday.  I need my sanity.  How can I solve this issue without hurting feelings?  Thank you.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 2:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 2:18 PM

Tell them to go home that you are busy. 

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 2:23 PM

I would set limits to one maybe two days they can come over.  And while they are there I would not give them food I would give them water if they want something to drink.  And when they ask for a snack tell them to go home and ask there mom.  We knew better as kids to go to a neighbors house to play and ask for food. 

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 2:24 PM
I had the same problem. Tell them when they can cone and when they have to go home. That's what I did and it got better.
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by Bronze Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 3:26 PM

i've turned my son's friends away on many occasions.   they come over uninvited and expect me to be mrs. hospitality.  nope.  i've never even met the parents of most of these kids.  i know i'm not letting my kids go to a friend's house if i haven't met the parents.    some of these kids act like little heathens and i don't want them around if they can't follow my rules.  one of his friend's got banned because he kept bringing his potty mouthed brother with him and they were both extremely disrespectful.  if they can't follow my rules when they're in my house, they don't get to come to my house.  period.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 3:32 PM

We had this problem and I set limits and feel a whole lot better for it.  For instance, I don't mind handing out the cheap popsicles but anything else I will not.  Also, if other kids have to go to the bathroom, etc. I make them go home.  I don't want them in my house.  I know that sounds mean and I do let my older boys neighborhood friends in the house but that's because I don't have to watch them 24/7. 

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 4:32 PM

Thanks Moms.  I'm so glad i'm not the only one.  It's great that my son has kids to play with but I need a break.  Can't get anything done for watching them.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 4:39 PM

Set some limits when they can come over.  If I let them, all the kids from the apartment complex would be at my house all day long.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 4:50 PM

I would tell them nicely that they need to go home. That it's ok once in a while to come over .. but not daily.

I would also talk to their parents if it keep happening. It sound like you are more of a baby sitter and their parents shouldn't be just allowing their kids to go to your house all the time.

by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 5:04 PM

 I'm going to share my ultra unpopular beliefs on socialization and friends with you. As we grow older, we find out just who is really our friend and who isn't. My father, in my entire life, only gave me 1 good piece of advice. He said that if you have even 1 friend in this world that you can call anytime-day or night, if needed and they would come to your aid, then you are lucky. As I got older, I found this to be very true. The world is full of users, degenerates, stupid people, mean people, etc. As such, one of the best things I ever did was I started getting real picky aout whom i ALLOW access to my life and time and resources. I sincerely hope my kids will follow suit.

You see, I personally elieve that all this socialization crap is just that-crap. I have my theories on why this happened (and because they are completely impertinent, I'ma keep quiet about them). Then, kids go to school and all the teachers are complaining that they can't teach bc all the kids think school is a big SOCIAL function. Well, duh! My advice is this: Send your kids over there for a change, if they get sent back, forget those ppl, for real. Yeah, your kid's gonna be upset, but far less upset than he will be later on, wasting time and energy on friendships that are only halfheartedly reciprocated. It's like this, a good friend is a gift, and to whom much is given, much is required, so if you're getting the hunch that you are the neighborhood 'free sitter' -you probaly are. Teach by example and say see ya if your neighbors are unwilling or unable to return the favor. Oh yeah, and as far as doling out food and beverage, every "I'm hungry" would be met with "time to go, buddy, see you later, go tell your mommy".

by Kelly on Aug. 17, 2011 at 5:08 PM

I agree with prior posts. Good luck setting some boundaries!

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