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Marriage

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:31 PM
  • 19 Replies

Which marriage,in your opinion,is more dysfunctional?


a: The spouses love&like each other,but have issues with intimacy.

b: There is no love between the spouses,but they have regular sex.
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Strega
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:34 PM
B. A can be worked on.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:52 PM
3 moms liked this

To me the word marriage does not define anything. People hold TOO MUCH to that word. Yes, I am married BUT its because I wanted to be, not because of society or anything else. Marriage is what you make it, and for that matter so are relationships. People are always saying marriage is sacred and bible thumpers say its a sacred bond from their god but you know what,,,,, people have been shaming the word word marriage for decades! It means nothing if the 2 people involved arent commited to each other. So, in this day and age, to me, its just a word. Actions speak louder than words. If you are commited to someone then, to me, you do not have to be married to solidify your relationship. If you cant stay commited to someone without being legally married then you do not need to be in any relationship.

sweetmissy_05
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:57 PM

B

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:11 PM

B

ame4c
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:18 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting nodramamama311:

To me the word marriage does not define anything. People hold TOO MUCH to that word. Yes, I am married BUT its because I wanted to be, not because of society or anything else. Marriage is what you make it, and for that matter so are relationships. People are always saying marriage is sacred and bible thumpers say its a sacred bond from their god but you know what,,,,, people have been shaming the word word marriage for decades! It means nothing if the 2 people involved arent commited to each other. So, in this day and age, to me, its just a word. Actions speak louder than words. If you are commited to someone then, to me, you do not have to be married to solidify your relationship. If you cant stay commited to someone without being legally married then you do not need to be in any relationship.

 I always say it's just a piece of paper that allows the government to charge you more in taxes.  However, there are legal things that you need to be married for in order for the government to recognize your spouse as your relative.  That is what the piece of paper is for.

I am religious and I do believe that marriage takes 3 people to make it work.  Yep, God, man and wife.  If you do not have the 3, you will not make it.  But that is my belief and I will not marry a man that doesn't believe in God or even the same about marriage.  I went down the road already once just to have my husband abandon me and my kids after 12 yrs.  This is why the legal piece is just a piece of paper to me. 

I have been with my SO for 4 yrs now and we don't know if we will ever get married legally for the piece of paper.  However, we are married in our hearts and by God.

     ame4c





 

TableforSeven
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:57 PM
B
nodramamama311
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:01 PM

See and I think thats great, that you and your partner do not think that a piece of paper makes your marriage better, I am just saying that no matter what you believe, whether in a god or not, that your beliefs dont make your relationship strong, YOU do. There are MANY "claimed" religious people that have had highly public failed marriages. Its the person, not the belief, that makes a partnership.

Quoting ame4c:

 

Quoting nodramamama311:

To me the word marriage does not define anything. People hold TOO MUCH to that word. Yes, I am married BUT its because I wanted to be, not because of society or anything else. Marriage is what you make it, and for that matter so are relationships. People are always saying marriage is sacred and bible thumpers say its a sacred bond from their god but you know what,,,,, people have been shaming the word word marriage for decades! It means nothing if the 2 people involved arent commited to each other. So, in this day and age, to me, its just a word. Actions speak louder than words. If you are commited to someone then, to me, you do not have to be married to solidify your relationship. If you cant stay commited to someone without being legally married then you do not need to be in any relationship.

 I always say it's just a piece of paper that allows the government to charge you more in taxes.  However, there are legal things that you need to be married for in order for the government to recognize your spouse as your relative.  That is what the piece of paper is for.

I am religious and I do believe that marriage takes 3 people to make it work.  Yep, God, man and wife.  If you do not have the 3, you will not make it.  But that is my belief and I will not marry a man that doesn't believe in God or even the same about marriage.  I went down the road already once just to have my husband abandon me and my kids after 12 yrs.  This is why the legal piece is just a piece of paper to me. 

I have been with my SO for 4 yrs now and we don't know if we will ever get married legally for the piece of paper.  However, we are married in our hearts and by God.


AutumnDreamer
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:08 PM

Nodramamama, this is the type of post that causes drama lol  Your rant about what marriage is (in your opinion) has nothing to do with the OP.  And contrary to what some might think, I am not trying to be mean or snarky just pointing out the irony in your name.

As for the OP, IMO B is more dysfunctional.  IMO marriage is about love and wanting to show the world the commitment you have chosen to make to each other, marriage is not about sex at all.  Any two sonsenting adults can have great sex, but a great relationship takes so much more.

Quoting nodramamama311:

To me the word marriage does not define anything. People hold TOO MUCH to that word. Yes, I am married BUT its because I wanted to be, not because of society or anything else. Marriage is what you make it, and for that matter so are relationships. People are always saying marriage is sacred and bible thumpers say its a sacred bond from their god but you know what,,,,, people have been shaming the word word marriage for decades! It means nothing if the 2 people involved arent commited to each other. So, in this day and age, to me, its just a word. Actions speak louder than words. If you are commited to someone then, to me, you do not have to be married to solidify your relationship. If you cant stay commited to someone without being legally married then you do not need to be in any relationship.


Tracy ~
Wife to 1 Engineer
Mother of 3 Humans and 3 Dogs
http://journeyofahousewife.blogspot.com


Anniebel22
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:23 PM
Well said!

Quoting Strega:

B. A can be worked on.
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Karen_29
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 6:31 PM

i think the more dysfunctional is B. As long as u love each other you can work on A.

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