Long story short.... My husband who I have been with nearly 18 years cheated on me, broke up with her then found someone new 2 weeks after moving out, taking her on a date with our kids - she ended up trying to takeover his weekends and keep the kids out of it and he supposedly broke up with her, she saw the error of her ways, they got back together. Well I exchanged words with her 2-3 times. The first time I set up a meeting so I could know the woman who was around my kids, we got along well, in another situation we'd probably be good friends, forward to a few weeks later when she convinces him to not take the kids to NY which he promised them he would and to go visit her family in NY instead - I let her know that it was wrong of her to use a trip he should have taken with his kids to her advantage - she now thinks I am an interferring witch - I appologized to her even though I never raised my voice or said anything offensive or disrespectful, she hung up on me, fine. Then she begins copying pics of my kids off fb and posting them on her wall saying love my new family - I asked her politely to take them down because she asked neither my permission nor their father's to post their pics (my stbxh won't post pics unless he knows everyone on his friend list, I am the same way). Fast forward to now -- about 6 months have gone by and I decide I have had enough of this awkwardness and I need to get along with her because she will be a part of my kids lives and I need to make it smooth for them. She won't talk to me other than through my stbxh - fine but she questions everything I do, she gave dd a card for her first communion and I thanked her and sent her a pic of dd in her dress, she told stbxh that she doesn't believe I sent it. She gave dd a bday gift, it didn't fit so I sent it back with the receipt after stbxh saw it was too small and asked her to get dd whatever she wanted so that it would still be a gift from her and not something I picked out - she claims I just don't want to deal with it. These are just two examples but I keep extending the olive branch and having it smacked back in my face so I am done, if the stbxh wants to have the two of us get along he needs to start with her because honestly I am tired of trying to make it work when I wasn't the one who screwed up in the first place, she knew he was still married.