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What would or have you done?

Posted by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 11:51 PM
  • 20 Replies
My dh and I are visiting my mom and staying in one of her extra rooms that no one ever sleeps in. My dh is only staying 2 more days and he goes home and our dd and I will be staying here for 3 weeks to see my family and visit.
I wanted to have sex with him but he says if we do that it would be disrespectful towards my mom. He says when we go visit his family and stay at their house we don't do it there out of respect too. (I actually thought it was because we slept in his sisters bed.)
I don't see how it would be disrespectful at all. No one is even going to know anything happened, not that they would care.
We haven't had sex in 2 months and it will be another almost month until we get the chance again, if even then. I am getting really pissed off with his refusal and constantly turning me down, (but that's a whole other post.)

What would or have you done in situations like this?
by on Oct. 13, 2012 at 11:51 PM
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Replies (1-10):
anotherandree
by Inga on Oct. 13, 2012 at 11:56 PM
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I have to agree that having sex in someone else's bed (and in my family's house) is disrespectful, but that is how I was raised.  I know that it is frustrating you, but it sounds like there is a bigger issue (and that you already know that).

Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Oct. 13, 2012 at 11:58 PM

I don't understand what else you could have done.  He said no. 

Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:05 AM
Quoting Dabberdoo:

I don't understand what else you could have done.  He said no. 



He says no all the time. I guess I'm just f***ing pissed since he says no all the time anyway, unless HE wants it, which is rare. I'm just beyond frustrated.
Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:08 AM
Quoting anotherandree:

I have to agree that having sex in someone else's bed (and in my family's house) is disrespectful, but that is how I was raised.  I know that it is frustrating you, but it sounds like there is a bigger issue (and that you already know that).



Yes, it is a bigger issue, and I don't know how to deal with it either. I'm so close to not even wanting to come home at the end of the 3 weeks.
conniejo75
by Bronze Member on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:08 AM
2 moms liked this
You're married its not disrespectful in my opinion. It is not like u are a teen sneaking your BF in your window
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Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:14 AM
Quoting conniejo75:

You're married its not disrespectful in my opinion. It is not like u are a teen sneaking your BF in your window


That's exactly the way I see it! I am 36 and he is 42. We have been married almost 2.5 years. We aren't some kids trying to sneak something past our mommies.
NicLof2
by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:22 AM
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I'm sorry but I don't think it has anything to do with y'all staying at your parents sounds like to me he's using it as an excuse and maybe you need to sit him down and talk about what's really going on.
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ShaunnaMichelle
by on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:23 AM

I would not have sex in my parent's house or in my husband's parent's house. I agree with your husband that it would be disrespectful. My husband and I will be celebrating 15 years in November. 

Have you tried talking to him at other times that he has said no? If he's not "in the mood" is there something you could do to get him in the mood? 

Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:39 AM
Quoting NicLof2:

I'm sorry but I don't think it has anything to do with y'all staying at your parents sounds like to me he's using it as an excuse and maybe you need to sit him down and talk about what's really going on.


We have talked about it. It usually ends with him saying that its not you, its me kind of thing. So in reality, it how's no where. We don't even sleep in the same room! He sleeps on one side of the house and I and our dd sleep on the other.
mommybug77
by Crystal on Oct. 14, 2012 at 12:42 AM
We haven't stayed at any relatives houses in about 13 years so not sure what we would do.
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