In the school's bathroom, another girl showed my daughter how to *updated
French kiss! Complete with putting her tongue in my dd's mouth!
This happened a few months ago around Christmas time. My dh and I were shocked and upset and wanted to speak with the girl's parents. We waited until after winter break to try to make contact. When I learned the little girls' mom died last year, I didn't feel comfortable talking to her dad who may, or may not, be abusing this little girl. My dh and I really didn't know what to do. More and more my dd would tell me of things this other girl would do at recess even though my dd considers the girl a friend. She is very aggressive and bossy but I figured they are children and will learn to work things out. (the girl is the size of a 4th grader. Both the girl and dd are in 1st grade.) I recently contacted my dd's teacher after I had enough of this other girl.
I got a response from her teacher, counselor and principal. We exchanged several emails between the 4 of us. The principal and teacher seemed very helpful in trying to find a way to work thru everything. The counselor, however, started out really nice and then her last email upset me but I can't figure out why. In her first emails she said my dd was a sweet girl. And she said she pulled the girl and my dd aside and talked to them. I did not want this to happen without me or her dad there! Anyways, it's done. So I told her if she wants to have a counseling lunch session to discuss things please do so without the other girl. This is her last email:
"No worries. Your daughter will not be invited to lunch. It would have been helpful had you notified us of the kissing event when it happened--that way, we could have intervened appropriately."
I don't know why she'd say "no worries". It seems like she's dismissing us. And her wording on not inviting my dd to lunch seems like a punishment in a way. Her saying we should of notified her sooner of the kissing pissed me off the most! We really did not know what to do and tried to feel the situation out a little more. She's hinting I failed my dd for not coming to her about the kissing right away.
I don't know if I should email the counselor back or if I should meet with her teacher and principal only. Can anyone tell me if I'm reading too much into her last email? And what would you do about the kissing event? I think the last email was a brush off.
Again, my dd thinks of this other girl as a friend. My dd is almost 7 and the other girl is 7. TIA
Update: I sent an email worded how Mama_l suggested. Of course I changed a few things but her advice was spot on! It worked because I immediately got a response and a meeting for the next day! The counselor came, along with the principal and her teacher. When introduced, the counselor was very warm and friendly towards dh and totally avoided eyecontact with me, lol! Anyways, all went well and we ended up getting an understanding of everyone and of the situation. It went very well. And the counselor came to me and shook my hand as we were leaving. So, they're going to look further into the other girl and her boundry issues and they said they'd keep an eye on dd. I'm happy with the outcome!