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Friendship question.?

Posted by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 4:14 PM
  • 35 Replies

Ok My  best friend of 10 years haven't talked in months with her other then last week which wasn't great... Things haven't been good with us in years, she can be quite rude and will never say sorry for it. Even when she is and I'm upset its me texting her again (with no word of a sorry from her) and I just brush it under the rug. well back in Nov. I really needed her with my mom going threw surgery and she didn't even ask how my mom was or contact me at all.  I try to not text her, but I get so used to telling her everything. So  I was really upset that night and deleted her from Facebook, A childish thing I know and not at all the person I am but I just was fed up with her, I'm always there for her and she is never there for me. well no contact from her till last week when she decided to only invite one of my daughters to her son's birthday and my other daughter was crushed. I text her to say hannah was very hurt and her only response was "well its just a party for 10 of his friends!! i went on to text her back and say, I know but we have never done it that way, were close to eachothers kids and I would never exclude yours and no response at all to any of my messages.  Question? Should I drop the friendship? Let it go? It breaks my heart, I miss her so much, but how can I keep trying threw the years, always contacting her and asking how she is doing with nothing in return?!  Sorry this is long.. but hubby wants me to let the friendship go, has for years and I'm just having a hard time :(

by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 4:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
leeann3033
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 4:45 PM
Hmmmm...thats hard. It seems as though you two have different outlooks on things and with you putting in all the friendship effort is not really her being a great friend on her part. I would maybe tell her what you are feeling...but sometimes people grow apart and its ok for you to move on with your life if you feel as though you are the only one being the friend. Friendship is a two way street....if her behavior dosent change I might look for a new bestfriend. Goodluck!
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CarrieMJ
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 5:11 PM
Yeah talking to her is hard cause she literally has no response or says sorry you feel that way. I think I'm at a point of letting go, but it's just hard. When I'm friends i put in 100% and I'm usually a door mat and don't know when to give up :(
Pukalani79
by Kris on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:17 PM
2 moms liked this

 Sounds like a toxic friendship, unfortunately.  That being said, I don't think it's wrong to invite one sibling and not others. If they're only having certain number of kids, then that's what they're doing.  It's hard inviting people when you have to invite their siblings too.

leeann3033
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:26 PM
Sad to say but I think you just might have to but it may make her realize....you said you dont really talk to her much anyway so just keep it that way and maybe just keep your distance. Im sorry your going through this:(


Quoting CarrieMJ:

Yeah talking to her is hard cause she literally has no response or says sorry you feel that way. I think I'm at a point of letting go, but it's just hard. When I'm friends i put in 100% and I'm usually a door mat and don't know when to give up :(

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CarrieMJ
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 8:54 PM
Normally I would understand the party thing but we were best friends as are our kids, her kids come to all of our parties and that's how it's been for 10 years, so to all of a sudden not invite my 8 year old wasn't right and I know she did it so I could probably drop off my older one and not stay. She always even invited my 4 year old to parties that she couldn't participated in, cause she's close to the girls, they love her.
CarrieMJ
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 8:55 PM
It's just hard explaining to the girls that there friendship with her kids has to be strictly school based.
leeann3033
by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 12:08 AM
I know and that is the hard part but maybe its fir the best?
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CarrieMJ
by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 12:14 AM
1 mom liked this

Yeah I think so to. Its been months since we have talked and months even before that since things were ok, what kind of example Do I set for my girls and friends treating them bad, if I allow mine to? ya know

christina259
by Bronze Member on Mar. 17, 2013 at 12:21 AM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting leeann3033:

Hmmmm...thats hard. It seems as though you two have different outlooks on things and with you putting in all the friendship effort is not really her being a great friend on her part. I would maybe tell her what you are feeling...but sometimes people grow apart and its ok for you to move on with your life if you feel as though you are the only one being the friend. Friendship is a two way street....if her behavior dosent change I might look for a new bestfriend. Goodluck!

 I agree with this

leeann3033
by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 12:23 AM
Yes! Excatly!!!!!


Quoting CarrieMJ:

Yeah I think so to. Its been months since we have talked and months even before that since things were ok, what kind of example Do I set for my girls and friends treating them bad, if I allow mine to? ya know


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