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The importance of family????

Posted by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:17 PM
  • 12 Replies
How can I teach my children the importance of family when I can barely get along with our extended family? I keep trying to be there and shown up and support family events when we are invited and then when I have and event no one shows up or calls. Or their attitudes are so bad and negative I can't stand to be around them and the gossip and judging other people. I need a word on this because I do believe family is everything but I don't want my girls around negativity.
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
diaperstodating
by Angel on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:19 PM
Bump
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ambertreas76
by Amber on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:29 PM

I know the feeling.  Just teach the importance from within the family that you can nurture.  I don't get along with my inlaws... and my husband doesn't get along with them either... I really should say that it's their own choice to be infantile.  Just keep on being a great mommy.  Extended family isn't as important as the family that is there for the kiddos. Keep on keepin on!!!

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:56 PM

We sort of deal with that with DH's brother. Our kids think he's the greatest thing since sliced bread but they have no idea (because we don't let them) of the things he's done to people in this family. We constantly make excuses for why we can't be around him but I think our son who is 10 is starting to see through them. Hopefully there will come a time when I think he's mature enough to understand all the things we'll have to tell him. 

lovemybabes3
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 10:11 AM

i know what you mean...i dont speak to my family bc they blow up at me bc i dont live the way they want me to or do things they think i should do...and we live w/ my mom who i cannot stand at the moment...it is hard and i tell them that we (me and them) are a family, a team and we need to stick together and work together...i tell them i will always be there for them 

jsmom01
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 11:33 AM
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If they are getting older, use the time to educate your daughters on how gossiping, and being negative wastes a lot of time and energy and are behaviors that aren't good to model.  I'd then try and use the opportunity with extended family to say things like,  I really want to focus on positive things, and I'm uncomfortable with my kids witnessing the gossip.

They learn from you, so if they see gossiping, they will gossip.  Its ok to show your daughters that family is important but there are somethings that aren't right, and for those it is ok to remove yourself.  Your family is your daughters, and your primary responsibility is to them and not crochety family.

whatmynameagain
by Bronze Member on Apr. 5, 2013 at 11:41 AM
I have same issues with extended family. I accept all I really need is the family Dh and I have created with us and our babies. I know my kids see the value in that as they grow.as they get older you can explain how gossiping and drama can be toxic and hurt those you love and not to do it and keep themand yourself away from it by not partaking or responding to it.
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Pukalani79
by Kris on Apr. 5, 2013 at 12:18 PM
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 We have good relationships with our extended families, but still we stress "our family." We have family days each week that include just the 5 of us.  We're constantly doing things and hanging out and having fun.  My kids want to be home, which is great. :) I think that's how we stress the importance of family.

savingtheworld
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 6:52 PM
Thats where I'm at now..I'm going to counseling, an I'm taking the family with me:) were an extended family as well, an I have done every thing! I'm outta of patients an ideas
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Crissy2424
by Bronze Member on Apr. 5, 2013 at 8:25 PM

I say just teach them through your family and those you do get along with.

Babujai
by Bronze Member on Apr. 5, 2013 at 9:34 PM
We have re-defined family as the people we love rather than the people that are related to us. We're a blended family with a tight network of friends that we consider family and some family members that we don't consider at all.
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