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HELP... My son hates my fetus!!!

Posted by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 4:59 PM
  • 12 Replies

He is 6 and an only child. Was a pleasant surprise to find out we were having another 5 months ago (really thought 1 was enough, buuuut birth control fails and now we have a little girl on the way, very excited!) Anyways, he wouldnt even discuss the baby in my stomach the first 4 months, when he did finally last month he said "I want a brother OR a cat!" We explained in kiddy language that i cant have an animal... Only boy or girl and cant choose, his reaction "well then, if its a girl just leave her at the doctors and we can go buy a cat!" Funny huh??? Problem now, its a girl, we found out 4 days ago and he is PISSED! Any ideas on getting him more excited, involved or just plain accepting of this? Thanks in advance ladies! :)

by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 4:59 PM
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countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:02 PM
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My son was mad, but not to that extent. We let him choose her middle name and that helped him come around. He was also involved with choosing most of her bedding and nursery stuff. He was only 4 though, I don't know if any of that will work with a 6 year old. 

BellaMarie79
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:08 PM
1 mom liked this

Thats a good idea about letting him help with the name and buying stuff. Plus since its girly stuff he wont get jealous over what is picked out. Thanks, just threw me for a loop because my family and friends with more than one child all say that the first born was excited... He usually isnt such a demanding brat and loves babies so hopefully the whole helping thing will chill him out a bit. Thanks alot! :)

CamoChick
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:30 PM

My boys weren't too thrilled when I was pregnant with my daughter either.  I let them help with her name and her room......worked like a charm!!!  Good Luck!

im_not_trollin
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:35 PM
4 moms liked this

 Um, he is 6. Stop talking to him in kiddy language and he should be intelligent enough to grasp the concept of having a sibling and be a big boy about it. Sounds like he is just babied. We had my youngest when my oldest 2 were 4 and 5 and even they were old enough to get it. Sorry, I don't sugar coat much, and at 6 years old that is too old to be acting that way.

BellaMarie79
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:45 PM
1 mom liked this

Ohhhhh... I sooooo brought this on myself! Was told couldnt carry to term any children after having him so thinking he was my one and only (and wanting to give him the love and attention I didnt get as a child, i totally babied him and now im regretting it. I truely know why they say certain kids have "only child syndrome", trust me girl... Im paying for it now. And a cat? Had to sugar coat explaining how babies were formed and WHY its impossible to have a cat. Lol, wasnt really kiddy talk, more like trying to make sure anything i said wouldnt get back to his friends at school next day and have parents calling pissed that my son told their children how babies are made. I have a hard time sugar coating it too, so from experience i learned what words are "proper" for him to repeat... Ohhhhhhh cuz he WILL repeat! ;)

mamaslilpunkin
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 7:24 PM
1 mom liked this

 Alot of little boys your sons age have a fear/hatred of all girl related things,lol.When my nephew was 6,he would avert his eyes if a Barbie commercial came on tv.I said "James,whats wrong with Barbies?" He said "eww they're for girls!I don't want to look at girl stuff!" I said "What if you had a sister?Then you would have to look at it!" He said "well,I wouldn't play with it!" I said "well,maybe you could show her YOUR toys.Could she play with your stuff?" He said "Yeah but her stuff is ALLL hers!I won't touch it!"     To get him warmed up to the idea of a sister,maybe take him shopping and have him pick out a special outfit for her to wear when she is born or a cute stuffed animal to give her.Have him draw/color some pictures and he can hang them in the babies room. If he can read,ask him if hewould like to read to you and the baby in your belly.When the baby moves you can say "See?She loves to hear you read!She loves her big brother!"Ask him WHY he prefers a little brother.Maybe he thinks he can't play with a girl like he would a boy.If thats the case,remind him of some friends in school that are girls that he likes to play with(if any) and remind him that girls are FUN! :)

Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 7:40 PM
Honestly, if you make him feel included, he'll come around. I wouldn't stress it. (Mother of 6)
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Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 7:41 PM
And if you can see that you have been coddling him, no time like the present to buckle down so he doesn't blame all the new disciplinary issues on his new sibling. Start now.
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thanush
by Member on Apr. 12, 2013 at 12:25 PM

My husband was 10 when his brother was born. He has told me that, he often told his mom to leave him at the Dr before he was born.. But once his brother was born he was terrified that the Dr would actually keep him ( his parents and Dr pretended that they are going to give the baby to the Dr it seems)..

He also told me that at first he was embarrassed to admit he liked the new baby brother and it took him some time. :) that was 22 years ago and he love his brother so much. (As for now, He even pay for his brother's collage)

KylesMom409
by Linnette on Apr. 12, 2013 at 12:55 PM
I agree. Getting him involved will give him a sense of accomplishment.

Quoting countrymomma81:

My son was mad, but not to that extent. We let him choose her middle name and that helped him come around. He was also involved with choosing most of her bedding and nursery stuff. He was only 4 though, I don't know if any of that will work with a 6 year old. 

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