Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

30 Something Moms 30 Something Moms

How do you get over being cheated on?

Posted by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:06 AM
  • 14 Replies
1 mom liked this
And lied to? Me and dd's father are not together but I'm still mad at him and still don't trust him. He lies about other things now that makes me not trust him as we'll. but the cheating part has made me insecure with men and relationships and even myself. I never used to think down about myself but now when I'm not dating or getting hit on by men close to my age I'm starting to think there's something wrong with me. I do not want to get back together with dd's father ever. But I feel like something's keeping me from moving on and dating.
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:06 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
alexsmomaubrys2
by Bronze Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:07 AM

Counseling.

tapies2324
by Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:10 AM
Best way to get over getting cheated on is to move on. Join a dating website just to put yourself out there. All the replys will be a good ego boost.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
KylesMom409
by Linnette on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:13 AM
Easier said than done but moving on is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Hugs!

Quoting tapies2324:

Best way to get over getting cheated on is to move on. Join a dating website just to put yourself out there. All the replys will be a good ego boost.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
AuntieMom101
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:39 AM
First of all you have to realize that just because he cheated on you doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you.
2nd like the pp have said. You are just gonna have to put yourself out there. Not all men are liars and cheaters.
And maybe some counseling will help you get some self esteem back.
Good luck! :)
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Jinxed8
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 9:53 AM

Being cheated on is the worst type of insult / slap in the face in my book and the way you feel is normal.  And yes, it's hard to get over.   I was cheated on by my ex-husband, he threw away a 12 year marriage for a 27 year old chick he met at work and knew for 6 months !   I also felt like crap after ... in my case I was not single very long but still I know the feeling.  The first guy I dated I REALLY liked and he wasn't ready for a relationship as he wasn't over his ex-wife - it broke my heart in a million pieces ; I felt so bad about myself.  Anyways, I'm remarried now and yes, the fear is still there.  I want to trust my husband, deep down I do, but for the rest of my life there will always be a slight doubt in the back of my head.  I trusted my Ex too, and trust made me the fool. 

Stephd710
by Bronze Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:06 AM

My ex husband cheated on me our entire relationship.  Obviously I didnt find out about any of it until the end or I wouldnt have been with him for so long.  So far in dating, I havent had any issues with automatically thinking every guy is going to cheat.  BUT....i am alot better at seeing the signs that something is fishy.  I have dumped alot of men because they think they are so smooth and can pull one over on me.  And every single time I was RIGHT!  They arent all bad apples, i have dated some perfectly nice honest men too that I just didnt click with.  I use online dating to meet guys because I dont have alot of time to get out and there are not alot of places to meet people around here.  Its been good and bad, but always interesting!  My advice is: take nothing at face value, be yourself don try to pretend your're somthing you arent because it will just set you up for failure, if someone doesnt like you for who you are, they arent worth the effort.  Follow your gut an intuition, it will never let you down!

Pukalani79
by Kris on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:54 AM
1 mom liked this

 Counseling might be a good place to start.  Find some ways to rebuild your confidence so that you can look in a mirror and say "I am worth it and anyone who doesn't see it isn't"

12yrmama
by Bronze Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 12:59 PM

Change up your life. Take a risk!

I was a single mom when my serious boyfriend cheated on me. I felt so guilty about 'letting' it happen and how it confused my son. So I changed jobs. I found something totally different that really made me happy, and broke lol. We got a smaller apartment and re-defined our daily routines. It was positive for both of us. I concentrated on me!

I got a haircut (major for me), started eating better, and invited friends over as much as possible. Then,2 yrs later, wham! a 'good' guy came right to me. I realized I had been in a low place when I met the cheater so I attracted a low-down guy.  When I had my energy back I attracted a positive guy.

lilmistress
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 1:57 PM

Two great books. They are both easy & fun reads that totally changed my life and helped immensely: He's Just Not That In To You (not the movie) and It's Called Break Up Because It's Broken.

Karen_29
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 8:46 PM

Counseling would be a good start if that is not an option then maybe a really good friend who you trust. I was cheated on by my ex several times and it is hard to overcome. What you have to keep telling yourself is that it was not your fault. It was his choice to cheat with someone else. As far as your self esteem I have struggled with this my whole life and not all men are like that. If I was you I would do like some other people said and join a dating site and see what kind of replys you get or go out one night with one of your friends for a girls night out..you deserve it!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)