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Do you ever feel that the older you get the less fun things are? I do.

Posted by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 11:11 PM
  • 15 Replies

 Its almost like I feel like I've been there, done that, now what? I've been pretty busy for a very long time so maybe I'm losing touch with my "fun" side or something. I might also be going in and out of a little bit of the blues since I've had this last baby. Idk. When I see my kids play and they take such joy in the simplest things like a sprinkler in the backyard or the ice cream truck coming down the road, it reminds me of when things like that seemed so fun when I was a child too. Everythings still new I guess. Even during my teen years and early twenties life was full of excitement and dreams of the future. With my first child, that was a whole new wonderful experience to. My second child was also a new experience  because she was a girl(my first was a boy and just as enjoyable but in a different way) and we did all the girly things together. Now I have my third child, my baby boy and he is wonderful. I'm amazed all over again at the miracle of watching him grow into this little person he is. At the same time though, I feel I have been weighted down for so long. I know I need a vacation. In the past few months things have been  a bit hectic. I have less and less motivation to keep going. Heck, I don't even want to get dressed half the time. I do crave some excitement and some freedom to just get up and take off to where ever it is my heart desires without having to deal with screaming kids and packing up everything those kids and baby are going to need before we leave.To know that today is mine to have fun and do what I want rather than think what responsibilities do I need to tend to today . Thats is all I feel like I ever do is tend to the myriad of little nit noid chores of the day. Work, work, work with a few breaks in between but not enough time to truly get out and enjoy myself. Then I think, what is it exactly that I want to do and I realize that life just don't seem as exciting anymore. Nothing seems truly fun, even the things I used to find exciting. Its like the newness of just about everything entertaining I know of has worn off. I'd love  to be a kid again, to be able to have fun so easily and to just have all that freedom. Does anyone else feel this way?

by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 11:11 PM
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by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:22 AM

When I am in my state of depression I do. I was just feeling a bit this way a few months ago. I have had two miscarriages and then we are having a longer winter then normal. I was also getting mad at everything. So I knew it was time to see my Dr. We talked and she put me on some antidepressants.

I have been on them for a few weeks. I have notices little changes in myself. My hubby and children have noticed a lot more.

I would suggest talking to someone about how you are feeling. Like your Dr or a counseler.

by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 1:22 PM
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 I went through the same thing!! And yes I to spoke to my dr and was put on medication & I feel amazing. I have been on my meds for about 6yrs now. It also helps that my boys are a lot older and very cool people! It does drain you but it really does get better!! Hang in there! *hugs*

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by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 3:10 PM
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 I have a little bit of a different take on this. I've done the medication thing and hated it.  There was a point after my second child that I had postpartum and I was a complete nut, and I took an antidepressant and promptly got off of it within a few months. I don't know a way to sugar coat it, but sometimes I believe that being all grown up just sucks. I also think how parentin g has changed over the course of a few generations. One hundred years ago or so, kids were often seen as resources (can't wait till little johnny is old enough to help around the farm, find some work, etc.) FIfty years ago, kids were often to be 'seen and not heard'. Nowadays, it's really almost commonplace to see little junior running the show, ruling the roost, motherhood becoming equivocal to martyrdom, and unless you want to catch the ire of 'fellow' mothers as the dreaded 'lazy' parent, then you'd better get yourself some pills and forget you ever were anybody or ever had a purpose before waiting hand and foot on  your kids and their schedules lest you turn into one of those "horrifying' failures of a mother that dare go out (gasp) alone once a week or do something you enjoy JUST FOR YOU. Is it any real wonder that so many people are on so many drugs??? DOn't get me wrong. I believe that psychiatric psychotropic substances do have a very real purpose and having battled with depression for most of my life, I know how crippling it can be. I'm not talking about bonafide depression, though, I'm talking about the American credo of overworked-ness.If you're not familiar with the signs of depression, I'd suggest reading up on it and honestly asking yourself if the anhedonia you're experiencing is circumstancial or chemical in nature (if it's the latter, you may want to try a doctor).

In my opinion, I'm not hearing the whole 'everything feels like shit and life has no real purpose for me' of depression. It sounds as though you have been running yourself ragged and for whatever the reasons may be, have neglected to take care of you for a change. If you have any old interests, try rekindling those, or try something new. Enjoy a night to yourself REGUARLY or if you have a SO, be that 'awful, bad mother' and find a sitter for a night, even if all you're doing is a bunch of nothing productive. It strikes me as odd, in general, that women are so well equipped at reinventing ourselves, yet, once we have kids, so many of us never manage to get past being the mom, chef, maid-e.g serving others, for far too long. I've had my own experiences with this. DH and I lived in another state. We knew nobody and as such, we literally NEVER had a night off/away from our responsibilities for even one night a year. I'll readily admit that I took it like a champ, but I'll also admit that I did become that self-righteous, "you go out with your friends how much??!! I NEVER leave my kids with ANYONE EVER'mom, and even though I handled it quite well for about 2 years, come the end of year three, I was all spent up and felt a lot like how you've described. We finally got to move back home and after getting settled in, I got in touch with some of my friends (that also have kids) but that did not mean that we only did things with the kids every time we saw each other. Personally, I feel much better. I'm far less overwhelmed. I don't wake up with that sense of residual stress and sense of boredom from the days before and unenthusiasm at the day ahead of me when I wake up. I laugh a lot more, I enjoy life more and despite what I myself may have led the present-day me to believe a few years back, no, my home didn't fall apart and my kids didn't end up in CYS or with a laundry list of disorders because I do things just for me. In fact, my home has been happier and healthier since mommy hasn't been running around like a bitchy pverwhelmed mess! AGain, if you suspect you do have depression, there's certainly no shame in that. If you need to talk to someone or take some meds to make you feel better, then that is the right course of action to take.It's all about what works for you, but if you think it's just life and neglecting self, then I do suggest taking some 'me' time -guiltlessly.

by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 5:44 PM
Yeah - stuff isnt too fun or exciting to me anymore either. I think its just the fact that Im too tired...3 kids, 2 jobs. Im just tired.
by Ruby Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 8:11 PM

Yep. I am a super paranoid person, especially kid-wise. I am afraid something will happen to them so anytime they do the smallest thing I freak out and start yelling. I hate that I'm like that because I don't know how to relax. This makes me a very tense person and that makes it hard to have fun or at least see the fun in things. 

by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 9:17 PM

I have just found that my interests have changed. Instead of going to the bar, I'd rather go to the comedy club, or casino. Instead of going to a big party, I'd rather just get together with a few friends. I like doing bigger things like traveling, and shopping....

by Linnette on Apr. 21, 2013 at 9:25 PM
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I've found that my interests have changed too.

Quoting MJP76:

I have just found that my interests have changed. Instead of going to the bar, I'd rather go to the comedy club, or casino. Instead of going to a big party, I'd rather just get together with a few friends. I like doing bigger things like traveling, and shopping....

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Excited For The New Year!
Yesterday at 11:55 AM
by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 9:28 PM

Im just getting started:)

by Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 9:38 PM
I feel like this. Medications are an excuse. Ive tried and hated them. Got fat on them, they suck. Now im in shape, pregnant again and working on my marrisge. BUT---- what the heck should i do.... not super excited about anything... Im in a rut.

Now what do we do?
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by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 11:58 PM

Life Sucks. ;(

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