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UGH! I am not a SAHM!!!!

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I feel unappreciated when people always assume that I am a SAHM. It takes a lot of effort to be a SAHM and maturity, yes. You have to have a relationship that is condusive to this arrangement. I though... I am not a SAHM!!!!

I live in a nice house, drive a nice car, and I WORK! Yes. And I am on the loan! And this is not my only HOME!

All the other Moms in our neighborhood, if they work, working is a hobby. Not a hobby over here. My hubby and I are equal contributors. 

If ONE MORE PERSON comes to our door and asks, "can I speak to the owner" or "who makes the decisions here" I will vomit on them! I get completely bypassed and people ask my husband what he does for a living because we have such a nice home.

Petty. Yes. Still drives me crazy... This is what happens when you marry AFTER doing everything on your own for so long *embarassed*

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 10:50 AM
Replies (11-20):
TableforSeven
by Judy on Apr. 29, 2013 at 11:52 AM

I always looked old then.....even at 21 I was never carded!  Though DH and I both were once at 35 while staying at a resort....but we are convinced the girl was just being a jerk.  My father was carded at a baseball game a few years ago...he was 73 at the time.

Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I must be looking my age these days. I bought my husband beer the other day and the guy told me he didn't need to see my ID. I made him look at it anyway,lol.

Quoting TableforSeven:

Years ago a telemarketer called my apartment and asked if my mother was there....guess I have/had a young sounding voice.  My mother happened to be visiting for lunch at the time, so I handed her the phone and told her the guy asked for "my mother".  It was a short conversation because when the guy started his spiel my mom informed him that this was her daughter's place and that she didn't live there.

Quoting ChancesMommy07:

Now that is some straight up bullshit. That didn't have anything to do with being a SAHM, that dude was just being flat out ignorant!

Years ago when we bought our house I had a jehovahs witness come to the door and ask to speak to my mom but I had been cleaning and was wearing my hair in pigtails so maybe I did look really young, I wish I still looked that young,lol.

Quoting gcecelie:

Well, for me it happens all the time. Maybe it's because I look young... I dont know.

Example: these guys came to our old home to do help us move, I met them and left to go to the office. You know one of them asked my husband if now that he is moving to a better neighborhood is he going to get a white wife.

WTF! That is wrong on SO many levels!!!! That @sshole!


Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I am a SAHM and I've never had anyone say that stuff to me. WE own our homes and vehicles and WE are both on all the paperwork. I also consider myself an equal contributor to the house though so maybe thats why I don't notice. I've never thought of being a SAHM as not contributing as much as my husband does. 








bluedymond
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Oh my, did you kick them out??!!


Quoting gcecelie:

Well, for me it happens all the time. Maybe it's because I look young... I dont know.

Example: these guys came to our old home to do help us move, I met them and left to go to the office. You know one of them asked my husband if now that he is moving to a better neighborhood is he going to get a white wife.

WTF! That is wrong on SO many levels!!!! That @sshole!


Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I am a SAHM and I've never had anyone say that stuff to me. WE own our homes and vehicles and WE are both on all the paperwork. I also consider myself an equal contributor to the house though so maybe thats why I don't notice. I've never thought of being a SAHM as not contributing as much as my husband does. 



gcecelie
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 11:58 AM

Here is another example: 

as a Christmas gift I got my DH a new radio for his car. He finds out and decides he HAS to tag-a-long with me to see the technician. I have all the questions and parts needed to do the upgrade, my DH knows nothing about it, he is just there. I ask the tech a question, and he turns his back to me and answers to my DH. I ask the tech another question, he does it again. The tech says we need a part, I show him the part. Tech turns to my DH and says its wrong even though it is exactly what the Tech said we needed. He didnt even read it. I wanted to strangle the guy!

Quoting TableforSeven:

Years ago a telemarketer called my apartment and asked if my mother was there....guess I have/had a young sounding voice.  My mother happened to be visiting for lunch at the time, so I handed her the phone and told her the guy asked for "my mother".  It was a short conversation because when the guy started his spiel my mom informed him that this was her daughter's place and that she didn't live there.

Quoting ChancesMommy07:

Now that is some straight up bullshit. That didn't have anything to do with being a SAHM, that dude was just being flat out ignorant!

Years ago when we bought our house I had a jehovahs witness come to the door and ask to speak to my mom but I had been cleaning and was wearing my hair in pigtails so maybe I did look really young, I wish I still looked that young,lol.

Quoting gcecelie:

Well, for me it happens all the time. Maybe it's because I look young... I dont know.

Example: these guys came to our old home to do help us move, I met them and left to go to the office. You know one of them asked my husband if now that he is moving to a better neighborhood is he going to get a white wife.

WTF! That is wrong on SO many levels!!!! That @sshole!


Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I am a SAHM and I've never had anyone say that stuff to me. WE own our homes and vehicles and WE are both on all the paperwork. I also consider myself an equal contributor to the house though so maybe thats why I don't notice. I've never thought of being a SAHM as not contributing as much as my husband does. 






Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

gcecelie
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 11:59 AM

He didnt tell me until much later. I noticed that they avoided me. Maybe they were embarassed... @ssholes

Quoting bluedymond:

Oh my, did you kick them out??!!


Quoting gcecelie:

Well, for me it happens all the time. Maybe it's because I look young... I dont know.

Example: these guys came to our old home to do help us move, I met them and left to go to the office. You know one of them asked my husband if now that he is moving to a better neighborhood is he going to get a white wife.

WTF! That is wrong on SO many levels!!!! That @sshole!


Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I am a SAHM and I've never had anyone say that stuff to me. WE own our homes and vehicles and WE are both on all the paperwork. I also consider myself an equal contributor to the house though so maybe thats why I don't notice. I've never thought of being a SAHM as not contributing as much as my husband does. 




Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

mamawolf1103
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:00 PM

I work form home (daycare) and have never had anyone say that to me. We are also both on all the loans and consider ourselves as equal contributors even though he obviously makes more money. It would annoy me too if anyone said those things to me.

Kword
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:02 PM
11 moms liked this

If you think being a stay at home mom equals "not doing anything", clearly you really have never tried it! :D HAHAHA!

winterglow
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:03 PM
1 mom liked this

 I agree. I get this a lot with phone marketers. They establish who they are speaking to first and then ask the questions.


Quoting VintageWife:

I don't think they're assuming you don't own the home, it's just normal to ask for the home owner so that you don't start speaking to the wrong person.


 

TableforSeven
by Judy on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:07 PM

On the rare occasions that we have encountered that....usually at home-stores where DH is clueless but I know exactly what I want/need...  If a tech-clerk turns to DH, he will quickly correct them and tell them they need to speak to ME.  Also - my DH is not a violent man...but if anyone had disrespected us and our marriage the way that mover did - they would be shown the door in a micro-second.

Quoting gcecelie:

Here is another example: 

as a Christmas gift I got my DH a new radio for his car. He finds out and decides he HAS to tag-a-long with me to see the technician. I have all the questions and parts needed to do the upgrade, my DH knows nothing about it, he is just there. I ask the tech a question, and he turns his back to me and answers to my DH. I ask the tech another question, he does it again. The tech says we need a part, I show him the part. Tech turns to my DH and says its wrong even though it is exactly what the Tech said we needed. He didnt even read it. I wanted to strangle the guy!

Quoting TableforSeven:

Years ago a telemarketer called my apartment and asked if my mother was there....guess I have/had a young sounding voice.  My mother happened to be visiting for lunch at the time, so I handed her the phone and told her the guy asked for "my mother".  It was a short conversation because when the guy started his spiel my mom informed him that this was her daughter's place and that she didn't live there.

Quoting ChancesMommy07:

Now that is some straight up bullshit. That didn't have anything to do with being a SAHM, that dude was just being flat out ignorant!

Years ago when we bought our house I had a jehovahs witness come to the door and ask to speak to my mom but I had been cleaning and was wearing my hair in pigtails so maybe I did look really young, I wish I still looked that young,lol.

Quoting gcecelie:

Well, for me it happens all the time. Maybe it's because I look young... I dont know.

Example: these guys came to our old home to do help us move, I met them and left to go to the office. You know one of them asked my husband if now that he is moving to a better neighborhood is he going to get a white wife.

WTF! That is wrong on SO many levels!!!! That @sshole!


Quoting ChancesMommy07:

I am a SAHM and I've never had anyone say that stuff to me. WE own our homes and vehicles and WE are both on all the paperwork. I also consider myself an equal contributor to the house though so maybe thats why I don't notice. I've never thought of being a SAHM as not contributing as much as my husband does. 








Pukalani79
by Kris on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:09 PM

 That would be extremely frustrating!!

jett286
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 12:15 PM

Several years ago an older gentleman who was selling insurance came to our house and we discussed our life insurance and homeowners etc.  He spoke mainly to my husband even though I was the one who hadles all the insurance issues in the family.  I was a licensed insurace broker before we moved to a different state and started our family.  Even AFTER my husband told this "gentleman" to speak to me about our insurance when the man called and I told him I was NOT giving him a copy of my life policy...that I could tell him everything he needed to know about it....said to me......wait for it...welll little lady, you should speak to your husband!  I told him that 1.  I was NOT a little lady (sorry I'm 5'9 and was taller than he was) 2.  I was the one HE needed to speak to about our insurance.  Pissed me off...needless to say we did not go with his company.  It is infuriating when you are overlooked or ignored because you are a woman!  Thank God my father and husband don't think women are inferior....  SAHM or not I am NOT ignorant or less of a person because I have breasts!

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