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i dont know where else to go for opinions

Posted by on May. 11, 2013 at 3:58 PM
  • 23 Replies
Ok, here's my situation. I have a 12 year old son. Me and his father split up in 2008. I went for custody while we were still together. I was with my sons father for 8 years and he sat on his ass the whole time. I raised my son I worked I went back to school all while this man sat home on the computer. Anyway, I got sole physical custody and his father got no visitation. He is court ordered to pay $25 a month and he has never made one payment. I honestly don't even want it. Here's where my problem lies. I am now married to a wonderful man who is willing to adopt my son. My son tells me each and everyday that he wants me to change his last name to what mine is (which is my husbands last name). I sent my sons father a polite email asking if he would sign over his rights and he replied rudely telling me no (amongst other things). Is there anything I can do, being that he doesn't pay child support, and hasn't seen his son since 2008. I would love to honor my sons requests but want to do it the right way. Any input is appreciated.
by on May. 11, 2013 at 3:58 PM
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Replies (1-10):
nurse1997
by on May. 11, 2013 at 4:04 PM
1 mom liked this

You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck

offrdngal
by Gold Member on May. 11, 2013 at 4:05 PM

 All you can do is take him to court, to relinquish parental rights.  Then, your husband can petition the court for adoption...if parental rights are revoked.

That's all that I know, to do.

staceyp6180
by on May. 11, 2013 at 4:06 PM
I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.

Quoting nurse1997:

You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck

staceyp6180
by on May. 11, 2013 at 4:07 PM
Thank you for your response

Quoting offrdngal:

 All you can do is take him to court, to relinquish parental rights.  Then, your husband can petition the court for adoption...if parental rights are revoked.


That's all that I know, to do.

nurse1997
by on May. 11, 2013 at 4:11 PM
1 mom liked this

 yes family court, and a family lawyer, but heres the thing if the sperm doner doesnt pay and see the kid he might want to after he has to  start paying the 25 bucks a month  its a gamble  its really hard to get his rights taken away even thou hes not paying 


Quoting staceyp6180:

I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.

Quoting nurse1997:

You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck


 

mumsy2three
by Shauna on May. 11, 2013 at 4:21 PM
1 mom liked this

I would contact a lawyer and start the process to have his parental rights terminated.Let the lawyer know that you haven't received any support from your son's father and that your ex has made no attempt to see or have contact with your son. Not sure how many years have to pass, it was 2 years when my cousin had her son's father's rights terminated.

staceyp6180
by on May. 11, 2013 at 4:21 PM
He was ordered in 2008 to pay child support and my son has yet to see a dime. I just am having a real hard time with the bullshit, it just doesn't seem fair to me. I have been doing it without him for all these years and I have to get his ok for this, this sucks.

Quoting nurse1997:

 yes family court, and a family lawyer, but heres the thing if the sperm doner doesnt pay and see the kid he might want to after he has to  start paying the 25 bucks a month  its a gamble  its really hard to get his rights taken away even thou hes not paying 




Quoting staceyp6180:

I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.


Quoting nurse1997:


You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck




 

nurse1997
by on May. 11, 2013 at 5:40 PM

 Ya it does but we have such great laws 25 bucks whats that suppose to do wipe your ass good luck doll but dont except  much ;]


Quoting staceyp6180:

He was ordered in 2008 to pay child support and my son has yet to see a dime. I just am having a real hard time with the bullshit, it just doesn't seem fair to me. I have been doing it without him for all these years and I have to get his ok for this, this sucks.

Quoting nurse1997:

 yes family court, and a family lawyer, but heres the thing if the sperm doner doesnt pay and see the kid he might want to after he has to  start paying the 25 bucks a month  its a gamble  its really hard to get his rights taken away even thou hes not paying 


 


Quoting staceyp6180:

I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.


Quoting nurse1997:


You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck


 


 


 

Bella14308
by Member on May. 11, 2013 at 6:47 PM
In ct its the childrens probate court

Quoting staceyp6180:

I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.



Quoting nurse1997:

You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck

staceyp6180
by on May. 12, 2013 at 7:25 PM
Yea 25 isn't much these days

Quoting nurse1997:

 Ya it does but we have such great laws 25 bucks whats that suppose to do wipe your ass good luck doll but dont except  much ;]




Quoting staceyp6180:

He was ordered in 2008 to pay child support and my son has yet to see a dime. I just am having a real hard time with the bullshit, it just doesn't seem fair to me. I have been doing it without him for all these years and I have to get his ok for this, this sucks.


Quoting nurse1997:


 yes family court, and a family lawyer, but heres the thing if the sperm doner doesnt pay and see the kid he might want to after he has to  start paying the 25 bucks a month  its a gamble  its really hard to get his rights taken away even thou hes not paying 



 



Quoting staceyp6180:

I'm not trying to sound stupid but what court, like family court? And I appreciate your response.



Quoting nurse1997:



You will have to  go thru the courts to have his rights terminated first before you can do any thing had the same issue its not easy and you will need a lawyer best to wait till hes 18 the cost adds up good luck



 



 




 

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