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Who would step up?

Posted by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 6:45 AM
  • 21 Replies
Having a debate with my DH who would step up if your mother or mother inlaw was sick (with cancer) the sons/daughter or daughter inlaw?
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 6:45 AM
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Replies (1-10):
offrdngal
by Gold Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 7:19 AM

 My MIL passed away in '08 (I'd never met her)

my sisters can take care their mother, if she gets sick...don't bother calling me.

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jun. 15, 2013 at 8:15 AM

I would be the one to step up in both situations.

I think my brother would be involved somewhat if our mom got sick, but the bulk of it would be placed on me. If my MIL got sick, again I would be the one to take it on. My husband would do what he could but I think I would be much more involved. I think my SIL would be around as much as she could but she lives in another state.

diaperstodating
by Angel on Jun. 15, 2013 at 8:21 AM
I would step up if my mom was sick. My two sister in laws would take care of their mother if my mother in law was sick, and I would help. She has three sons, and they might help as much as they could but they wouldn't "step up".

That concerns me because people always say "boys take care of their moms". I hope that's true for me when I get sick, I only have boys.
LilliesValley
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 8:24 AM

Both. I mean for my mil my sil lives closer, but I would still whatever I could to help and care for her even if I don't care for the woman that much. I've done this before and would do it again, because she had my dh. For my mom I am the primary child for her and my stepdad. My brother is primary for my dad and step mom. We decided this years ago prior to there being any health concerns so that there would never be any fighting or hurt feelings. I would still expect them to help (he and my sil) just as I would help with my dad and stepmom if needed. That's my family period. There's room for everyone to help.

TimetoMomUp
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 4:28 PM

For my Mom or Dad it would be me. My FIL is in deceased. 

MamaBear1978
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 5:44 PM

Everyone.  The only questions asked would be working around schedules.

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 6:11 PM

Well, my MIL is sick. She doesn't have cancer but she does have a brain aneurysm in the base of her brain that is inoperable. And she has high blood pressure so she's high risk. She's not bed ridden or anything so she's low maintenance but SIL and I take care of her. My husband and his brother both work and SIL is the only daughter. 

My mom has two daughters, myself and my sister. Although my sister lives with her she doesn't have the common sense of a gnat so if something happened the caretaking would be all mine and my husband's. 

And that's just a wierd debate. Wouldn't everyone in both situations do as much as possible for the sick person? I could see my husband helping me take care of my mom just as much as I help him and his sister take care of his mom. 

xoxRachelxox
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 6:39 PM

I would. 

isaacsmommy68
by Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 7:17 PM
This would be my family. Everyone would pitch in. We are doing it now for my grandfather. I have a great family


Quoting MamaBear1978:

Everyone.  The only questions asked would be working around schedules.


elzmnsf
by Silver Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:03 PM
When my mil was going through her breast cancer, we were the only family in state. My dh was deployed, so I handled it all. I would put my dd on independent study for weeks at a time for her surgeries. My own mother was amazing too. Since I lived 3 hours away, and my mom was retired and lived in the same town as mil, she took her to her chemo and was on call when mil needed her. She was amazing. Now we all, and my brother, live in the same town (and even though brother and sil live in my parents house, they are super selfish and would probably be I no help to anyone), so I think most of us would come together to get done what needs doing.
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