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Spoiled kid or Lazy parenting ?

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:44 AM
  • 37 Replies

So my daughter is 9.5 years old ... she does gymnastics and guitar lessons, at home she has a bike and a skateboard, her own bedroom with her personal TV, DVD player, boom box, DS, toys, books etc.  I also bought her a brand new double bed a couple of weeks ago including all new linen, curtains etc of her choice. 

Friday night she had a little friend come and play, then around 8pm it was decided that DD would go and stay the night there.  Saturday morning I picked her up specifically a 10h30am because she wanted to come with me to the vet with the dogs, after that, I bought some take out for lunch because I had to run her to her guitar lessons at 1h30pm , when we got home DH & I  spent all afternoon with her in and out of the pool, playing games, ate dinner outdoors , went for a walk as a family, back in the pool until it was her bedtime, I allowed her to watch a movie in bed before lights out.

Yesterday Dh and I decided to deep clean the kitchen ; she was pouting and complaning that we never do anything with her and she's bored. That we never do any family outings or "activities" ...  Seriously ???  Yes, fine I'll admit that we havn't taken her out to a specific event ($$$) in a while but can't she appreciate the fact that we spent all day with her Saturday ? Can't she appreciate everything she has ?  

Should I feel guilty ?

by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Amberleigh81
by Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 11:52 AM
3 moms liked this
No. Why isn't she helping you clean? At 9.5yrs, she is more than old enough to clean. Then she wouldn't be bored because she would have something to do! :)
lcm3181
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:30 PM
1 mom liked this



Quoting Amberleigh81:

No. Why isn't she helping you clean? At 9.5yrs, she is more than old enough to clean. Then she wouldn't be bored because she would have something to do! :)


She'd be helping clean, especially after the bored comment. I tell my much younger kids (6 and 3) that if they tell me they are bored i will find someting for them to do. My kids don't have half as much stuff as OP's daughter and they have no excuses for being bored!

lcm3181
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:31 PM

Also, no. You shouldn't feel guilty. You sound like you have ample family time. And family time also includes taking care of family things. Like cleaning, grocery shopping, etc.

MommyTo2Boyz
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:34 PM
1 mom liked this

No you should not feel guilty. She just seems to be going through a little ungrateful period. I hope it's just a phase. I'm curious to see what kind of suggestions you will get.

jackiewal10
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:39 PM

I wouldn't feel guilty.  That's partly an age/phase thing, but I would also be making her help clean.  Fold laundry or whip counters. Unload the dishwasher.  something.  I would also be taking some of that stuff out of her room.  A 9 year old doesn't need any of that in her room.  Maybe the stereo.  And the books are fine.

diaperstodating
by Queen25Princes on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:40 PM
No, you shouldn't feel guilty.
Eve-marie
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 12:58 PM

Girl, if it didn't cost then it doesn't count, lol. My 4 are the same, always bored because we NEVER do ANYthing! But show them that their bedding needs folding or toys have to be picked up, they aren't bored anymore. Lol. Give her a set of chores to do, structure helps a whole lot. She won't say she's bored too much more. They mostly want to avoid additional chores. 

Jinxed8
by Platinum Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 1:30 PM

She's definitely going through an ungratefull stage ...  her chores are cleaning her room and putting her clean laundry away.   I also make her feed the dogs.  Sometimes she gladly cleans with us sometimes ... but we have to make it into a game / challenge... 

As per my daughter, all her friends go out with their families on the weekend and do stuff.  Outings, activities, but as a full time working mom, the weekend is all the free time I have to get stuff done !  I try to do as much as I can during the week but if I want my house to be clean and sanitary something's gotta give !!  Also as much as I wish it was the case, money does not magically appear in my wallet.  So I don't always have the budget to do a million outings with her everything costs money.

yesterday DH and I were talking and trying to remember when we were kids if we were so dependant on our parents ... at nearly 10 years old and not 1/2 of the same stuff at my finger tips, I don't remember being so hung up on my mom to do outings and activities ... ??


Quoting MommyTo2Boyz:

No you should not feel guilty. She just seems to be going through a little ungrateful period. I hope it's just a phase. I'm curious to see what kind of suggestions you will get.


 

mrs.hartman12
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 1:33 PM
This. Even my 4yo helps clean.


Quoting Amberleigh81:

No. Why isn't she helping you clean? At 9.5yrs, she is more than old enough to clean. Then she wouldn't be bored because she would have something to do! :)

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jun. 17, 2013 at 1:37 PM


Quoting diaperstodating:

No, you shouldn't feel guilty.

I agree. I think the I'm bored statement is pretty common, my 11 and 8 year old sons say it often.

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