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When something seems out of your reach do you keep trying or just assume it's not meant to be?

Posted by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 4:12 PM
  • 14 Replies

Here's the deal. My husband worked for a company for 5 years with the promise that after 5 years he would be able to start training for a promotion.  He put in his time and when it came down to it his boss told him he didn't want him to do it because he was a family man (it involves being away from home a good bit). Um, yeah, he is. Why do you think he wants to go and make money? For his family. So that he doesn't have to work 8-5 for the rest of his life while putting pennies into our 401K. The job he wants means he'll be gone a few days at a time but when he's home he won't have to go into the shop. And it means a huge pay increase which will help us build our credit, get out of debt and hopefully allow us to purchase land and a house. He wants to do this for our family and I'm supporting him. 

In February he switched companies (same type of work) and the guy told him that after one year he could start training for another position so he was pretty happy. Since then a few things have happened to make him second guess whether he wants to do it or not. First, he found out that the guy right above him wants the promotion so that means DH will have a longer wait. Then he recently found out that in addition to knowing all of his work, he'll have to know other stuff as well, plus the company made the pay slightly lower for trainees. He's taking all of this into consideration. He's still willing to do it, he's just upset that it keeps getting harder and harder. 

My question is this. When something seems to keep jumping out of your reach do you keep going or just assume it's not meant to be? 

by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 4:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
JasonsMom2007
by Lisa on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:00 PM

It depends on how strongly I feel about what is out of my reach.  Sometimes it's worth fighting for and sometimes it's just time to let go and move on to new goals.  Praying you guys figure out what is best for you!

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:19 PM


Quoting JasonsMom2007:

It depends on how strongly I feel about what is out of my reach.  Sometimes it's worth fighting for and sometimes it's just time to let go and move on to new goals.  Praying you guys figure out what is best for you!

Thank you. I'm struggling with being afraid that this is God's (or any higher power) way of saying "no, don't do this". It may sound silly but the job he wants is offshore and it's dangerous out there. Not particularly what he'll be doing, but being out there on a rig in the middle of the water is dangerous no matter what. 

JasonsMom2007
by Lisa on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:25 PM
Yes that's something I would wonder as well. If only we could see the future and know what the outcome would be!


Quoting countrymomma81:


Quoting JasonsMom2007:

It depends on how strongly I feel about what is out of my reach.  Sometimes it's worth fighting for and sometimes it's just time to let go and move on to new goals.  Praying you guys figure out what is best for you!

Thank you. I'm struggling with being afraid that this is God's (or any higher power) way of saying "no, don't do this". It may sound silly but the job he wants is offshore and it's dangerous out there. Not particularly what he'll be doing, but being out there on a rig in the middle of the water is dangerous no matter what. 


countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:26 PM

Yep, you are right!

Quoting JasonsMom2007:

Yes that's something I would wonder as well. If only we could see the future and know what the outcome would be!


Quoting countrymomma81:


Quoting JasonsMom2007:

It depends on how strongly I feel about what is out of my reach.  Sometimes it's worth fighting for and sometimes it's just time to let go and move on to new goals.  Praying you guys figure out what is best for you!

Thank you. I'm struggling with being afraid that this is God's (or any higher power) way of saying "no, don't do this". It may sound silly but the job he wants is offshore and it's dangerous out there. Not particularly what he'll be doing, but being out there on a rig in the middle of the water is dangerous no matter what. 



mandyj573
by Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:33 PM

Maybe it's not meant to be with the companies that he's been trying to do it with! That does not mean that it's completely not meant to be. I'd say he should certainly keep his eyes open for the opportunity that he wants. It's possible, with all of his experience, that he may be able to walk into that position with another company without having to make the initial year or 5 year commitment. Might sound crazy but it happened to me. I walked into a full time professor position without having to teach adjunct which is almost unheard of. If it's the right thing, the opportunity will fall out of nowhere!

diaperstodating
by Angel on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:41 PM

I keep trying! I don't give up!

 

diaperstodating
by Angel on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:42 PM

Did you post about this situation before? I feel like I have read this (deja vu).

nurse1997
by Bronze Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:51 PM

No it just means you have to work harder been there and done it it seems like why am I trying but hang in there ! 

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 9:30 PM


Quoting diaperstodating:

Did you post about this situation before? I feel like I have read this (deja vu).

Sort of. But the last time I was ranting about his boss not wanting him to go because he's a family man. I didn't feel that was his right. He's changed companies since then and since he's been with this company all sorts of changes have been implemented and things are just getting harder. 

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 9:32 PM


Quoting mandyj573:

Maybe it's not meant to be with the companies that he's been trying to do it with! That does not mean that it's completely not meant to be. I'd say he should certainly keep his eyes open for the opportunity that he wants. It's possible, with all of his experience, that he may be able to walk into that position with another company without having to make the initial year or 5 year commitment. Might sound crazy but it happened to me. I walked into a full time professor position without having to teach adjunct which is almost unheard of. If it's the right thing, the opportunity will fall out of nowhere!

Thank you!

There are tons of companies that do what he does but most of them want you to have certain offshore experience which he does not have. Not many oilfield companies are willing to train these days. He's ok with starting from the bottom, it's just that the bottom keeps moving further away....lol. 

He's decided he'll still try for the position when the time is right, now we just have to wait for that time to come. 

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