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How do you do it and not go insane??

Posted by on Jul. 12, 2013 at 2:59 PM
  • 30 Replies

Ok, i'm 33 years old....  just had my 4th child almost 7wks ago and i'm a SAHM.

I've been going through my days without thinking much cuz its always the same deal: kids, house, husband, kids, house, husband... 

I realized recently that I don't have hardly any ME time...like maybe 30min total over the course of a day...(not all at once).  And I don't have anything that I do for fun; no hobbies, etc.  

Its not that I can't think of anything I want to do its that I don't get TIME to do anything!

So, I ask....those of you with 3 or more kids... how do you do it?  I have to fight/struggle to get some time with DH... all we end up getting to do is watch an episode or 2 of a show we like...and usually i'm having to nurse the littlest one while this is happening...lol

I realize it won't be like this forever but what the heck can I do till then to not lose my freakin mind and mySELF, for that matter!?

Oh, side notes/disclaimers/extra info: the only family we have nearby is my MIL who works A LOT... I only have one close friend around here and she works part time and has to take care of her mother who is having a hard time dealing with all the deaths they've had in their family over the last year and a half.

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by on Jul. 12, 2013 at 2:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MCA23
by Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:17 PM

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?

 

Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:23 PM
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I have six.  I don't know what to say except you just do what you have to do.  I know that isn't helpful ut you are going to have to experiment to see what you can live with.  I read every night before I go to sleep.

Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:25 PM
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Way to project your frustration on this woman.  Its not her fault your family is rude and unreasonable.

Quoting MCA23:

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?



andy80
by Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:34 PM



Yeah, #4 broke the camel's back for sure... he was very much an "oops" baby...  

We had just gotten things to a good place with 3...  then BAM...4  

Honestly, I thought I had been doing pretty good for someone who never wanted kids in the first place...lol

But yeah, 4 kids is hard!


Quoting MCA23:

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?




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JadeTigr7
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:34 PM
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I just go with it.  Do I get overwhelmed sometimes?  Yes, but It is was it is.  I have 5 kids, 9 and under, and I enforce a quiet time in the afternoon (right now) and they go to bed at 8pm.  Every night.  Then my husband and I stay up until 10pm and then we go to bed.

It's not always that way, and we don't get regular "date nights" or anything, but we make it work. :)
 

MCA23
by Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:52 PM

Hey I never said it was, nor am I frustrated.  I was just asking- as I said, everyone's situation is different and I was trying to get a better understanding of hers.

Way to project your frustration on this woman.  Its not her fault your family is rude and unreasonable.

Quoting MCA23:

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?

 



 

MCA23
by Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 3:55 PM

I can imagine!  Well if anything, the three that came before should illustrate for you how short those baby years really are... as they say, the days are long but the years are short.  You'll be on the other side of it before you know it and will be wondering where your babies went.  Good luck!  I know I couldn't hang with 4.

Quoting andy80:

 

 

Yeah, #4 broke the camel's back for sure... he was very much an "oops" baby...  

We had just gotten things to a good place with 3...  then BAM...4  

Honestly, I thought I had been doing pretty good for someone who never wanted kids in the first place...lol

But yeah, 4 kids is hard!

 

Quoting MCA23:

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?

 

 

 


 

Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 4:02 PM

I apologize.  It really did read as though you were jumping on her case for being overwhelmed.  And your family unreasonable if they constantly want you to rearrange plans because of their children.

Quoting MCA23:

Hey I never said it was, nor am I frustrated.  I was just asking- as I said, everyone's situation is different and I was trying to get a better understanding of hers.

Way to project your frustration on this woman.  Its not her fault your family is rude and unreasonable.

Quoting MCA23:

My BIL and his wife have 3... and we hear all the time about how hard it is, and we change our family plans constantly to accomodate them.  You'd think they were the first people on the planet to have 3 kids.  Everyone's got their own loads to carry- someone with 2 kids might have a harder time than someone with 4, depending on their specifics.  Everyone's different.  I don't mean this to sound critical, I'm just really curious- but at what point did you start to feel overwhelmed and how many kids came after that point?  Or was it just the 7 week old that broke the camel's back?






Dabberdoo
by Bronze Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 4:03 PM

I would like to add that you are still a walking, raging hormone right now.  Things will calm down.

countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jul. 12, 2013 at 4:09 PM

Our children are 6 and 10. For the most part they are able to do things for themselves. I am a SAHM but we are rarely home. My son (the 10 year old) is in summer camp all week. DH brings him and picks him up on the way to work. My SIL comes get DD and I most days and we hang out all day. DH and I are active in community sports with our kids. All year long except for summer we are at one practice or another so I visit with my friends while the kids are practicing. We also have our children in their rooms by 9:00 pm so that we can spend some alone time together. 

All that mixed in with the fact that my grandmother lives next door and my daughter practically lives there and my mom will take the kids too, we do good with "us" and "me" time. 


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