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Finally told the kids. It was heart breaking.

Posted by on Jan. 13, 2014 at 9:17 AM
  • 16 Replies
It was hard and heart breaking but we finally told the kids that their Grandparents are getting divorced. Hubby explained so sweetly about how they need to be happy and they will remain friends and do stuff as a family still. Poor Lexi had tears in her eyes which made me tear up. We had todo it because his Mom is going about things the wrong way and apparently trying to push this new guy into our lives instead of letting us decide when we are ready to let him in.

Now the decision is whether or not to let her bring him to Lexi's 1st Communion/9th Birthday party in May. I know neither of my BILs are ready to deal with a new man in their Mothers life and Hubby was asking me about this. I really don't want to purposely bring drama to the party and I want everyone to be their for her day.
by on Jan. 13, 2014 at 9:17 AM
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Replies (1-10):
insanemomof4
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 9:48 AM
Lots of luck in whatever u decide to do. I know how hard any bad news is to have to break to kids. I remember what it was like telling our 4 kids that their nana my mom had cancer. Wow that was a tough one. Hope all works out.
Babujai
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 9:51 AM

Wow...that's rough.  Is there any chance you can talk to MIL's boyfriend about maybe "being too busy" to come to the communion/birthday party?  He's gotta know how difficult this all is for the family...maybe he'll show more respect for the stuggle than your MIL is.

LuvHugs429
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 10:14 AM


He has been a trooper about staying away and understanding how the family feels and is dealing with it. My MIL is the one being pushy about it. Thinking just because her kids are grown men in their 30's they should be able to handle the situation better. She forgets she also has 6 Grandchildren ranging from 15 to 2 yrs old that are also going to have to deal with this.

Quoting Babujai:

Wow...that's rough.  Is there any chance you can talk to MIL's boyfriend about maybe "being too busy" to come to the communion/birthday party?  He's gotta know how difficult this all is for the family...maybe he'll show more respect for the stuggle than your MIL is.


Wayne Jr and Rayna Married April 29, 2000

Wayne III - September 16, 2002

Alexis - May 12, 2005

rgba
by Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 10:17 AM
Kids are more resilient about these things than we are. Since it is not their immediate family unit, and no one died, I imagine by May they will be fine as long as their dad doesn't add fuel to the fire.
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LuvHugs429
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 10:32 AM
The Father has been ok. You can tell he is sad but he is going with it. It's my Middle and Youngest BILs that keep making a huge fuss. My Hubby said he would be willing to meet him but it's the way she goes about it. Instead of asking her sons to find a way to be comfortable to meet him and she keeps telling them how it's going to be. It can't work that way.

Quoting rgba: Kids are more resilient about these things than we are. Since it is not their immediate family unit, and no one died, I imagine by May they will be fine as long as their dad doesn't add fuel to the fire.
LuckymOmma_
by on Jan. 13, 2014 at 10:36 AM
1 mom liked this

Wow that sounds rough,I am sorry Your family is dealing with that,I will send some positive prayers.

rgba
by Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 10:56 AM
Don't forget, she's their mother. I recommend staying out of it--your kids will be fine. Invite your MIL, who is welcome to bring who she pleases. Tell your BILs that, while it is not your favorite, it is how it is and you do not want anyone to ruin the day

Quoting LuvHugs429: The Father has been ok. You can tell he is sad but he is going with it. It's my Middle and Youngest BILs that keep making a huge fuss. My Hubby said he would be willing to meet him but it's the way she goes about it. Instead of asking her sons to find a way to be comfortable to meet him and she keeps telling them how it's going to be. It can't work that way.



Quoting rgba: Kids are more resilient about these things than we are. Since it is not their immediate family unit, and no one died, I imagine by May they will be fine as long as their dad doesn't add fuel to the fire.
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Jinxed8
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2014 at 11:05 AM
1 mom liked this

Divorce is never a pretty situation, when me and my ex-husband divorced apparently my niece took it pretty hard, my sister said she cried a lot (poor thing)  I had no idea it would impact my sister's kids that much.  

For your daughter's day ; it's a touchy situation.  But your MIL seems to insist on bringing this man so just let her do it.  Tell your BILs to be on their best behavior and remember that this day is about your daughter and not adult / family drama.

KylesMom409
by Linnette on Jan. 13, 2014 at 11:35 AM
1 mom liked this
Quoting LuckymOmma_:

Wow that sounds rough,I am sorry Your family is dealing with that,I will send some positive prayers.


I second this. Keep us posted on how everyone's doing.
poshkat
by on Jan. 13, 2014 at 11:41 AM
2 moms liked this
Put your foot down. I wouldn't meet my dad's gf until they were together for almost 2 years. I refused to simply because I don't want my child or I to get attached to anyone and than have that person leave because my their relationship didn't work out.

My child's stability is way more imoortant than the latest fling
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