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Marriage

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2014 at 1:48 PM
  • 27 Replies
Ladies, I was talking to a friend when this topic came up and I would like some opinions. She said she'd be devastated if her husband told her one day that he only married her for their kids. I said me not so much. IMO if a couple can last until their kids leave for college all while loving each other, what would be so bad about that? Should married be only for love? Or can you sometimes marry for the family aspect of it?
by on Jul. 24, 2014 at 1:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mom2Boys9501
by Sharon on Jul. 24, 2014 at 1:49 PM
4 moms liked this
I married for love. Children were an added benefit.
incogNinja
by Bronze Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 2:48 PM
3 moms liked this
I don't believe in soul mates or anything like that. I agree with you , I think any two people can marry and make it work in theory. Not two infinitely different people or anything which would cause major problems, but yeah. I think mutual respect and common goals are more important than eternal undying love. Feeling "in love" comes and goes in any marriage as far as I am aware. It's how hard the two involved want to try and fix it which actually matters.
countrymomma81
by Platinum Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 3:23 PM

We got married before we had kids. At the time we married we didn't plan on having kids. Nature intervened and 2 children later we are still as much in love as ever. We are not afraid to embarrass our children by holding hands at the store or sneak a kiss in when we get a minute. 

We definintely married for love. I don't think I could be with a person who didn't love me for me as a person. That's not fair to either one of us. 

Frances0923
by Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 3:24 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree with you 100% .. Get through the raising kids part and if you want to leave after they are grown than peace out Lol 

Spoiled_Blonde
by Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 3:55 PM
This exactly. Why even get married if you aren't in love with the other person?

Quoting Mom2Boys9501: I married for love. Children were an added benefit.
Jinxed8
by Gold Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 3:57 PM
1 mom liked this

I think you should marry out of love.  That being said, I believe that all marriages somewhat lose their luster after several years.  Doesn't mean you don't love each other anymore just that it's not like the first 6 months of the relationship.  I believe some marriages can work like really good friends or roommates.  It depends on the person. Ultimately I want a lover and a best friend and I wouldn't settle for the lesser ^^ and I want to still be in love with my husband all the way to the end. 

But when children are involved you should really try to make it work ... of you don't I believe ripping off the band-aid is the best solution than traumatizing the children when they are older.

Nicole_2007
by Bronze Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 4:14 PM

I married out of Love.  I already had two kids and my husband always tells me that if he didn't love me he wouldn't have stayed.  I think you can't truly be happy if you don't love you are with.  Thats how it was with my first.  I realized I never really loved him and things didn't last

ambcortez
by Bronze Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 4:49 PM

For some, I'm sure that's okay. If it works, it works. For me, personally, I married for love. Having children was a bonus.

cali_angel_girl
by Bronze Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 4:51 PM

I married for love.  Being in a marriage just for the kids might work for some couples but it wouldn't work for us because I wouldn't want to be in a loveless marriage.

Courtney610
by Member on Jul. 24, 2014 at 6:00 PM
I married for love. I would never stay in a marriage for the sake of the children.
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