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Something disturbing me

Posted by on Sep. 25, 2015 at 6:11 PM
  • 13 Replies
My husband goes to his parents house that's almost 4 hours away from where We live for 3 days. He becomes a totally different person there. he ignores the presence of his wife and 2 children 4 hours AWAY from him altogether. As if he is indifferent. Then on the day before he has to come, our younger daughter gets very sick and she is mildly asthmatic also. So I have to take her to the doctor while I am suffering from secondary bacterial infection prior to a viral common cold and have high fevers. So I tell him can't you come today? He Says I have to meet my parents too!!
I mean, I felt as if I and his child were of no consequence to him whatsoever.

When he is at home I.e with us, his cell phone will be his priority, to check Facebook like a damn teenager every now and then and when he was there, he was all there for his parents who only respect him if he financially support them!! I say this because the rest of their two sons are treated like crap Infact his parents don't even talk to those sons. I recently was told by my husband that his mother cursed his elder brother also. And of course if this was the son who gave her money, she would be all over him. Huh

Well what matters to me is my mother lives right next door. I want a suggestion that he feels right the same way that he made me feel these 3 days. I'm telling you, I feel there's something wrong somewhere. I'm furious.
by on Sep. 25, 2015 at 6:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
kyledavidsmom
by Tara on Sep. 26, 2015 at 7:29 AM
I'm sorry I have no advice but here's a hug.
Pukalani79
by Ivy on Sep. 26, 2015 at 12:25 PM
I am sorry.That's hard having to be in two places at once, and it's hard needing someone who not there. Getting even isn't going to help anything though
diaperstodating
by Queen25Princes on Sep. 26, 2015 at 1:04 PM
Hugs
clairewait
by on Sep. 26, 2015 at 4:47 PM
1 mom liked this

Your post is a little bit difficult to read, but I think I get the overall gist.

It is not weird to me that your husband goes to his parents house without YOU, but weird that he doesn't take the kids. I'm not a huge fan of my in-laws, so the annual trip to grandma and grandpa's house is a daddy + kids trip and it is perfect for everyone.

It sounds like you are looking for validation of your feelings?

Um. Yes, furious. Sounds about right. Your husband is being a bit of a slob here. That doesn't mean that he can't improve though. I think you need to talk to him. And I think you need to figure out whatever it takes to make him listen and take the right steps to remedy this.

YOU and the kids should be his primary family now (its even Biblical, haha). YOU COME FIRST. That's how I feel anyway.

rgba
by Bronze Member on Sep. 26, 2015 at 4:51 PM
Honestly, if he doesn't do it often, there is nothing wrong with him wanting to spend 3 days with his parents without constantly checking in.

Unless your kid is really sick, or you are, he shouldn't have to race home--especially if you have your mom next door to help.
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MamaBearEH
by Bronze Member on Sep. 26, 2015 at 9:17 PM

This exactly.

Quoting clairewait:

Your post is a little bit difficult to read, but I think I get the overall gist.

It is not weird to me that your husband goes to his parents house without YOU, but weird that he doesn't take the kids. I'm not a huge fan of my in-laws, so the annual trip to grandma and grandpa's house is a daddy + kids trip and it is perfect for everyone.

It sounds like you are looking for validation of your feelings?

Um. Yes, furious. Sounds about right. Your husband is being a bit of a slob here. That doesn't mean that he can't improve though. I think you need to talk to him. And I think you need to figure out whatever it takes to make him listen and take the right steps to remedy this.

YOU and the kids should be his primary family now (its even Biblical, haha). YOU COME FIRST. That's how I feel anyway.


Have a signficant other that's away most of the time due to work?
Join me in HARDLY THERE, and meet other mothers who can relate.

KylesMom409
by Linnette on Sep. 27, 2015 at 9:03 AM
This

Quoting kaycersmom: How often does he go over there for days? Could you guys go with him or have his parents come to you? Thats crazy to me they wouldnt want to be spending time with their grandkids too at least.
drmkj
by New Member on Sep. 27, 2015 at 11:37 PM
the kids are too little for him to take with himself.


He would only go once or twice a year for not more than 2-3 days.
drmkj
by New Member on Sep. 27, 2015 at 11:42 PM
Of course we could go with him but taking up a 5 hour journey one way and then staying 2 nights and another 5 hours journey back... While I'm expecting my third baby and told by the doctor to take it easy since I had discharge, that's not my piece of cake. Plus where my husband's parents are is a village and I tell you, you just get confined to that house and eat and sleep all day n night... I really wasn't looking forward for such an adventure lol
ShaMac
by on Sep. 28, 2015 at 10:01 AM
How old are the kids?

Quoting drmkj: the kids are too little for him to take with himself.


He would only go once or twice a year for not more than 2-3 days.
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