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How we became 7 strong...

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 2:26 PM
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When my DH and I married in 02, I already had a daughter from a previous relationship.  We both knew we wanted more childre but after several attempts to get preg. and after I was diagnosed with a thyroid and ovarian condition we came to the realization that we were not able to conceive a child together. We went through some fertility testing, but decided early on that this was not the avenue we wanted to pursue for emotional and spiritual reasons. 
I have a couple family members who are foster parents and after talking w/ them we decided that adopting through the state was our choice, and we both agreed that this is how we would build our family.  I made the necessary phone calls and filled out, what seemed like, mounds of paperwork.  In January of 04 we attended our first class.  In the next 10 weeks we filled out more paperwork and completed two homestudies.  At times it didn't seem like the end would ever come. 
During one of our homestudies our worker asked us how many children we thought we wanted.  We both said just one and preferrably a boy (since we already had a girl) Oh and between the ages of 0-2 yrs.  She also asked us if we considered doing foster care as even though foster care isn't meant to be a back door to adoption a lot of the time fp were asked first if they want to adopt a child living w/ them.  We thought about it for a few days and then decided to go for it.  (after all if it didn't go well we could just stop fostering.)  Well before we knew it we were done w/ our training and received our license the following Tuesday.  Literally, 3 days later, the friday before Easter,  we got our first placement call.  We thought it'd be several weeks before we heard anything.  The CW said they had a sibling group of 5 but they needed a place for the 2 youngest, little boys, 3 and 23months.  My first thought was, "I thought we said we only wanted one and under 2yrs."  My DH and I talked it over and decided we'd take them besides it was Easter weekend.  These two little guys can't spend Easter in a shelter.  I left right away to pick them up; they were already at the shelter.  When I arrived I noticed one of them were sitting on a little girl's lap (their 10yr old sister) and the other was playing w/ 2 other little boys (their 5 and 7yr old brothers).  A staff member had me sign the placement agreement and told me who was who.  This was the very first time I had ever done anything like this and so I looked at the staff person like, was that it.  He said, "They're all yours now.  Good luck!"  I walked over to the little girl and knelt down in front of her.  She looked at me as if to say where are you taking my brother.  I explained that he and her other brother would be staying w/ me for awhile but that I'd take good care of them.  She began to cry.  I didn't know what to do.  My heart was breaking for her.  I looked around to the staff for some kind of help but to my surprise...nothing!  I promised they'd be o.k. and took the older one by the hand and left.  As soon as I got to my car I broke down.  What had I just done?  Was I strong enough to do this? 
I know I will never forget that awful day or the look on her face.  
She and her other two brothers were eventually placed w/ their bio aunt and then adopted.
My 2 little boys; Noah 6yrs and Chase 4yrs became permanent members of our family in Jan. 06.  The following month; Feb, the day we planned to have the boys adoption party we received another call to take their NB bio-brother, Garrett. We of course said yes.  In November of that yr bmom signed over her rights and in Jan 07 TPR was granted.  Not even a week after TPR on Garrett (Garrett wasn't even a yr.) we received yet another call to take Bmom's newest baby, Hayden....another boy!   

It's been 6 weeks since then and we're all doing Great!  We've been told that Garrett's adoption should be final in the next month or so and that the CW will be asking for early termination on Hayden due to bmom's past TPRs and continued/current issues.  When that time comes, we'll be 7 strong!  My daughter thinks it's pretty cool that she's the only girl.....she doesn't have to share her room, clothes, or toys.   

Since our first placement call we have had 20+ children come into our hearts and home ranging in ages from birth-8yrs.  We have had many good experiences but at the same time we have definitely had our fair share of heart breaks along the way too.Funny to think just 3yrs ago all we wanted was one and now 4 boys later....total of 5 kids now I think we're done!   
 
Well that's pretty much our story in a nut shell.
~Melissa
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 2:26 PM
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Replies (1-2):
Kari_B
by New Member on Mar. 28, 2007 at 10:13 PM
Congratulations!! You guys are awesome.
fosteramie1
by on Mar. 30, 2007 at 3:07 AM
we have had two kids for 14 month and going to the adoption soon i cant wait i wish you the very best with all the kids and may be my kids will grow like yours did! all the best amie
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