Parenting a child with ODD
Hello! I have a youngling that I think is showing signs of ODD. His doctor writes me off saying it's just because he's three, but she doesn't live with him (and she was trying to convince me that he isn't showing signs of OCD before I corrected her, which just tells me that she isn't well schooled in child psychology lol). He's been like this since he was one... it hasn't gotten better or worse, it's just the same (but now with words lol). He has all the classic signs of it from what I can gather from doing online research about it. Even our families, who see him maybe twice a year, think there is something more going on than just terrible threes, and I know it isn't a parenting fail because our older child acts "normal" for his age and always has. I hate labeling my kids, but if there is an issue I prefer to address it BEFORE it progresses to a point where extreme measures are needed.
So my question is this... does anyone have any resources (like books or websites) that can help me learn how to parent a child that has qualities of ODD? I am having a hell of a time trying to find solutions that are effective on my own, and since the pedi. wrote me off when I brought this up I feel sort of like a failure as a parent to this child. Even if he doesn't have it, I imagine that parenting techniques recommended for ODD kiddos might be useful when trying to address some of his behaviors, so PLEASE point me in the direction of parenting books or materials specific for ODD if there are any! Thank you in advance!