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hey everyone let's introduce ourselves....and a few simple plans to help us all have a great time together

Posted by on May. 17, 2007 at 9:38 PM
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my name is shannon and my garrett is 10yrs old..he has aspergers, adhd, bipolar, odd, and panic disorder...i am a single mother of 3 other nerotypical kids also, all younger that garrett. right now he is very stable, and doing well, lets get together and help each other out...there are many challeges that we face every day...we can laugh, hope, and cry together on all that...we need each other...my whole purpose for setting up this group, even though there alot of them out there on cafemom, is because i was feeling very alone even being memebers of those other groups....i got blasted for my opnions a few times for what i said... all i was looking for was a friend....I wanted to create a more personal group a more personal way of getting to know each other and our child/ childrens needs. together i know we can help each other...i don't know all the answers and i'm sure there are moms out there that can really help me as well...so if you want a fun place to vent, cry, hope, and feel a part...this is the group for u.... no subject is thrown out....but please no personal attacks of any kind and i would really be dispondent if that happened...if u disagree with a post or responce feel free to state you opnion as well, but lets be adults and speak with love...all of us are hurting and we all show it in different ways..some times the most hurt person also seems the most angry...the Bible says a soft answer turns away wrath...so lets try that instead of bashing each other when we don't agree on a topic...please practise tolerance..the only post i will delete is if someone attacks anothers mothering skills...that hurts to the core and none of us need that right now....COOL?
make sure to only introduce urself in this post...please post your family story by adding ur our post so people will see it and reply to u in ur post....thanks shannon/admin
by on May. 17, 2007 at 9:38 PM
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Replies (1-10):
johnabbymommy
by on May. 17, 2007 at 11:06 PM
Hi everyone.  My name is June.  I have a 5 year old that has ADHD, Bipolar and I am sure others that are still not diagnosed.  Looking forward to getting to know everyone and learning new things.
Carla01
by Member on May. 18, 2007 at 12:26 AM
I have been happily married (whatever that means) for ten years. I do not have any family living nearby. I am Cancer (not a fanatic but I think it is fun!) I love Cats and food! I am very mischievous with my friends, I love to wind them up to make them laugh and take it back. I am very straightforward and I can take it back too. I can talk about anything, I am very open and often politically incorrect (not in purpose). I believe in God in the way of “God doesn’t give us what we can handle; God helps us handle what we are given”, bottom line: “If it is to be, it is up to me”. I am certain we are the experts regarding our children; we have the ultimate word, which is the most efficient way to obtain their requirements. Regarding Autism: The World is not going to adjust to my Son, I’m the responsible to amend my Son to adapt to the World… And I am convinced cats are 100% Autistic!!!

JosieKat
by Member on May. 21, 2007 at 8:32 AM
Hi Everyone. My son (we'll call him B) is 9, creative, smart, cute, difficult, wonderful and frustrating. I could go on but you get the picture. He was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade and we recently added ODD to the mix. He's been in counseling for the last year and a half, but at his last two sessions, when asked about his anger and subsequent melt downs, he shut down, tore her room apart and scratched himself until he bled. That is when I began searching for more help for us. After spending countless hours trying to find a child psychiatrist that would take a new 9yo patient, I finally found one about 45 minutes from us. So we started seeing him two weeks ago, today will be our third appointment with him and he seems to be ok. B talked to him, so that is a good start. He suggested (and I have already read in its entirety)The Explosive Child by Ross Green. At this point, I feel completely isolated, even though I am not alone. I have wonderful parents who help me in any way they can. I have an unusually close relationship with my mom, she is my best friend, and I know it pains her to see me so upset. I have a significant other we will call R, who has been a Godsend for B and I. He has two daughters that we have every Monday and every other weekend and B loves them. He usually has less explosions when the girls are here, which is weird. The problem is that I am the mom and I do not know how to not take every explosion, every hateful word, every pain of Bs to heart. I know in my head his issues are not my fault, but still feel responsible, and when he melts down, I stay strong in front of him, then privately break down. The end result is that B is fine and over it, and I am left feeling desperate and empty and R is upset becasue he can not help me and he wants me to stop punishing myself and trying to be a martyr (his words not mine)or he fears i will push him and everyone else away. Tbey just don't get it. B is not his son so I dont expect him to feel the same way I do, but how do I not feel this way? I do not want to be depressed, on the verge of tears all the time, and living by walking on eggshells wondering what will set B off next. When he is himself, he is so loving and truly feels badly for hurting me with his melt downs, but that does not stop him from having them and I know it is a disability and not his fault, but that does not make it easier. He is never happy anymore, the second he does not get what he thinks he should or something futile happens like he doesnt win a video game, he explodes. They are getting worse and I've had to retrain him so he does not hurt himself or me. I just don't know how to be strong and deal with this everyday, it is draining me. Wow, didn't mean to unload all that! Anway, hoping to meet other moms here who can relate so we all have someone to talk to! My email is katmjosie@yahoo.com and I'm on AOL IM as "newmexicanjosie". Happy Monday!
Trish99
by New Member on May. 21, 2007 at 3:57 PM
Hi all, My name it Trish I am 25 and my oldest Bio-son is 7. Since birth I new he was unique. He cried a lot, but thats as far is went, by 2 I still knew but now preschool also knew and was concerned. Jordon has been diagnose Bipolar/ ADHD, but because his symptoms overlap so much I call it a MOOD DISORDER. We just started Melitonin last night and it worked in the part of getting him to fall asleep and stay asleep . I'm not sure whats happened at school yet. He attends a Severe Emotional class 8:30 to 12:45pm. The school can't take him full days until he earns 1/2 hour increments back. To do this he must have less than 5min fits for a full week. Thats like asking me to donate a kidney a day.
shannon72
by Group Owner on May. 21, 2007 at 4:44 PM

Quoting JosieKat:

Hi Everyone. My son (we'll call him B) is 9, creative, smart, cute, difficult, wonderful and frustrating. I could go on but you get the picture. He was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade and we recently added ODD to the mix. He's been in counseling for the last year and a half, but at his last two sessions, when asked about his anger and subsequent melt downs, he shut down, tore her room apart and scratched himself until he bled. That is when I began searching for more help for us. After spending countless hours trying to find a child psychiatrist that would take a new 9yo patient, I finally found one about 45 minutes from us. So we started seeing him two weeks ago, today will be our third appointment with him and he seems to be ok. B talked to him, so that is a good start. He suggested (and I have already read in its entirety)The Explosive Child by Ross Green. At this point, I feel completely isolated, even though I am not alone. I have wonderful parents who help me in any way they can. I have an unusually close relationship with my mom, she is my best friend, and I know it pains her to see me so upset. I have a significant other we will call R, who has been a Godsend for B and I. He has two daughters that we have every Monday and every other weekend and B loves them. He usually has less explosions when the girls are here, which is weird. The problem is that I am the mom and I do not know how to not take every explosion, every hateful word, every pain of Bs to heart. I know in my head his issues are not my fault, but still feel responsible, and when he melts down, I stay strong in front of him, then privately break down. The end result is that B is fine and over it, and I am left feeling desperate and empty and R is upset becasue he can not help me and he wants me to stop punishing myself and trying to be a martyr (his words not mine)or he fears i will push him and everyone else away. Tbey just don't get it. B is not his son so I dont expect him to feel the same way I do, but how do I not feel this way? I do not want to be depressed, on the verge of tears all the time, and living by walking on eggshells wondering what will set B off next. When he is himself, he is so loving and truly feels badly for hurting me with his melt downs, but that does not stop him from having them and I know it is a disability and not his fault, but that does not make it easier. He is never happy anymore, the second he does not get what he thinks he should or something futile happens like he doesnt win a video game, he explodes. They are getting worse and I've had to retrain him so he does not hurt himself or me. I just don't know how to be strong and deal with this everyday, it is draining me. Wow, didn't mean to unload all that! Anway, hoping to meet other moms here who can relate so we all have someone to talk to! My email is katmjosie@yahoo.com and I'm on AOL IM as "newmexicanjosie". Happy Monday!
hi josekat...it was great to hear your story..i totally understand where u are...i know how alone you can feel...but remember  YOU ARE NOT ALONE...you can do it...we can all do it together...that is why we are here...if u have msn or yahoo..let me know that way we can talk one on one if u would like...feel free to post any questions or concerns you might have...i know we can all identify and if we put our heads together...who knows what we might come up with....shannon
shannon72
by Group Owner on May. 21, 2007 at 4:46 PM

Quoting Trish99:

Hi all, My name it Trish I am 25 and my oldest Bio-son is 7. Since birth I new he was unique. He cried a lot, but thats as far is went, by 2 I still knew but now preschool also knew and was concerned. Jordon has been diagnose Bipolar/ ADHD, but because his symptoms overlap so much I call it a MOOD DISORDER. We just started Melitonin last night and it worked in the part of getting him to fall asleep and stay asleep . I'm not sure whats happened at school yet. He attends a Severe Emotional class 8:30 to 12:45pm. The school can't take him full days until he earns 1/2 hour increments back. To do this he must have less than 5min fits for a full week. Thats like asking me to donate a kidney a day.
hi tish..great to have u onboard..so do u think he had early onset bipolar??  from birth i mean...?  feel free to add me to msn or yahoo is u want to talk one on one...that is always helpful...keep in touch ...shannon
MeganDupree
by New Member on May. 22, 2007 at 1:52 PM
Hello! I am a 19 yrold stepmother of a 9yrold son with anger issues. It's not been offically diagnosed; however, his birth mother is bipolar, his birth father has intense anxiety issues, and I myself have mild bipolar. So I can see the patterns of behavior following in him. His father and I both take meds and I use meditation and breathing techniques to control my mania and depresson as well as anxiety.  - his birth mother refuses to acknowledge that she needs help (I won't get into all that now).

Any way - Right now - My sweet stepson Adam, is taking Paxil every night. However, once again, his birth mother doesn't really think he needs it either, so some nights he has to go without. He has been on it long enough to understand how he feels with and without it.

He has anger problems, is beginning to scratch himself during outbursts, and has really recently began to throw and/or hit. Most of the anger is pointed at his little sister - she's not the cause - just the recipent.

If any one has advice or thoughts or stories...please share! I am trying to develop a pattern of ways to help Adam through difficult things and feelings...
momof3boys_84
by New Member on May. 24, 2007 at 11:02 AM
Hi my name is Suellen, my oldest son Patrick has been Diagnosed with PDD-NOS and ADHD.  He is the light of my life... I have two other boys who so far have no problems... although i feel my middle child has ODD..but not yet diagnosed.  I am 23 and I am a single mom on my own.  Life gets tough sometimes but it always seems to work it's self out.  My mom seems to think that Patrick might have OCD becuase he repeats every thing he says like 6 times and repeats his movements as well... I am not sure if it could be that or just some traights from his PDD, if anyone could help on that it would be great.  I also have a myspace if you would like to look me up.
birdsong
by Member on May. 27, 2007 at 9:52 AM
Hello Everyone!
My name is Jenny .I am mom to eight kids.MY eight year old has aspergers and adhd.I am glad to be here.I never  had a support system til now.
tishintexas
by Member on Jun. 4, 2007 at 9:49 AM
Hi everyone I am Tish (don't be confused now you have a Trish and a Tish) :) I am a wife to Mickey of 9 years and mother to Austin for 5 years. Since Austin was 2 I knew there was something different. Not only was he well beyond his 2 years, there were just social skills and motor skills he hadn't accomplished yet I thought he should have. The Dr's and everyone else to boot just kept saying he was in his terrible 2's he is a boy...than that spilled into 3's he is a boy....than 4's he is a boy....by than I needed to be locked in a rubber room and I said enough is enough. We went to see a behavioral pediatrician. She did extensive testing and the results were ADHD/Mood Disorder/Anxiety Disorder/and Depression. At the time she suggested we see an ENT to see about his sleep issues, and sure enough Austin had Obstructive Sleep Apnea. He Adenoids were the size of shooter marbles and his tonsils were kissing together. After we had that out, we were stillt aking melatonin at night, but she only focused meds on the ADHD figuring the rest would go away once he sleep got under control. We went through Metadate, Daytrana and Focalin until the latter resulted in a seizure. So we stopped seeing her, that when my psychologist introduced me to Shannon, and after a long long conversation, I
realized she had been right (the Dr) but gone about it the wrong way and we saw another Dr a Child Psychiatrist. He was wonderful is initial diagnosis is ADHD/Bipolar but he asked us to follow up with a Child Psychologist for a 3rd opinion to make sure. And we did, we again have ADHD/Bipolar, but have added ODD/Anxiety disorder and Depression disorder and OCD tendencies to our mix....we go back to see the Psychiatrist this Wednesday and it could not come sooner. The meltdowns are more than I can take sometimes....and like I heard another mom so I know he can't help it and you try not to take the things they say to heart, I still have my own breakdowns as well.....I am so blessed to have found Shannon and this group, I have never had support either, from friends, family or spouse (he has recently just got on board) so this is a blessing.......
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