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should i feel guilty(about my mom and mothers day please)

Posted by on May. 18, 2007 at 7:08 PM
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should i feel guilty(about my mom and mothers day please)

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Poll Results

Question: should i feel guilty for not spending time with mom on mothers day (please read post before voting)

yes

7%

no

23%

you did what you thought was best for you and i understand

69%

other (explain

0%

Total Votes: 13

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Poll

Question: should i feel guilty for not spending time with mom on mothers day (please read post before voting)

Options:

yes

no

you did what you thought was best for you and i understand

other (explain


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Total Votes: 13

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Journal Post

every year on mothers day is a torn day for me. i spend it with my hubby and my daughter. we go to his moms house for an hour or two then my hubby takes me out to dinner and sometimes shopping. well due to the fact that my hubby and my mom dont get along, he cant stand her, i always spend a different day with my mom to celebrate mothers day with her. i generally buy her a card but nothing more, if i spend to much on her she will sell it for drug money or beer money.

my relationship with my mom is strained and beyond repair. i try to have a relationship but it has to be on my terms. she only sees my daughter every month or so, sometimes more if i am caught up on studying. this is all her fault but i wonder if i should make more of an effort. in my eyes my real mom, my grandma, died almost six years ago. i have always called her grandma, only out of respect, but felt like she was my mom, she raised me til i was seven or eight. my mom has done so much to hurt me and ruin our relationship yet i still stick around. Granted she is trying right at this moment, no drughs just alcohol, but i feel if i let my guard down i will get hurt and i cant trust her. she will never be allowed alone with my mom for even a second because of all the things she has done. i remind you this is her doing.

but should i feel guilty because i dont spend mothers day with her? she dont seem to mind spending time on another day and i do call her and wish her a happy mothers day and we talk. our relationship seems to be better if it is on the phone than in person. i mean she is trying to do good but i cant help but feel this is only temporary. every time i have let my guard down to trust her again she hurts me so i dont think i will ever trust her again. am i so wrong to feel that way? am i a bad person?

i fear that one day i will turn the news on and she will be on there as a jane doe because some drug guy wanted his money. i cant begin to tell you how that makes me feel. Hell the day my gma died she left and went to do drugs when i needed her the most. me and my gma were very close. i took care of her, she was a diabetic, and i hate to say this but i was her favorite grandchild, i think because she raised me til i was seven or eight and i took care of them and got in very little trouble. she tried not to let others see but they seen and they tell me it was okay with them because they know about our bond.

so i am just wondering if you guys think i am a bad person for not spending time with her on mothers day. this friday is the day i am spending with for mothers day, we are going to the zoo.

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Comments:

miss372 May. 17, 2007 at 10:20 AM (Delete)

I would not feel guilty at all! You do what you have to do for you and due to past experiences I totally understand why you would do that. Shows what a strong and wonderful person you are to still try to have some sort of relationship with her even after all the things that have happended. I think you are a respectful caring women. Hope you enjoy the time you spend with her on Friday at the zoo!   1-1 of 1 comments1

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Posted by on May. 18, 2007 at 7:08 PM
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amypoe
by Group Owner on May. 18, 2007 at 7:08 PM
i couldnt copy this from my journal properly so ignore the extras
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amypoe
children of alcoholics, drug addicts, or mental health families
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