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Is he showing signs of ASD or am i paranoid?

Posted by on Aug. 31, 2010 at 12:36 AM
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If anyone has any information or advise, or just an opinion, it would be greatly appreciated. I have b/g twins which are 16 months old. My daughter is very sharp and knows many words But my son however, we think he is starting to show signs of autism. I started to notice a few months ago that he doesn't really make eye contact. As time has been going on it is not getting any better and his speech is behind.He has been hitting all of his physical milestones just fine. He climbs like a monkey now but seems very behind socially. He will on occasion look at you but only for a split second and then becomes very distracted by whatever is around him. He can never hold eye contact and doesn't seem to interact the way he should. He does not point yet and really doesn't get jestures ( hold your hand out as a means for him to give something to you). He does smile at himself in the mirror and on rare occasion plays with his sister. He only knows one word so far ( ma-ma) but only when we coach him to say it. Any advise?

by on Aug. 31, 2010 at 12:36 AM
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by Member on Aug. 31, 2010 at 8:00 AM

You're going to be much better at diagnosing him than your doctor or any of us here. At this point, you are the person best qualified to assess both his strengths and deficiencies. Of course you probably already realize that boys and girls develop very differently, and comparing them to each other is unfair to both of them. Likewise, you can expect development to continue in the same manner--she will demonstrate more interest socially than he by nature, and you can expect her to potty-train far, far sooner than her brother in all likelihood. Here are some things to keep in mind as you begin to examine him more closely...

You said that you "started to notice" that he doesn't "hold" eye contact, but has he recently BEGUN to avoid/maintain eye contact, or have you only recently NOTICED it?

When you said that he "doesn't seem to interact as he should", on whose criteria are you basing those assessments--advice or opinions of friends and family, a child-rearing guide-book such as "What to Expect the First Year", or just increased awareness of ASD by the general public?

Keep in mind that distraction and ape-like climbing and lack of sophisticated social interactions are far more common in boys than girls, and may not be a good indication at all of his overall intelligence. His lack of speech may also be easily explained. If you have other children, or your house is particularly active, he may not feel the need to ADD to the conversation. He says "mama", and maybe that's all he has to contribute until he comes into his own.

The following are some common traits of kids with ASD, and if your son has many of them, it is possible that he has some form of Autism.

How was his APGAR score? Were there any complications at all at birth?

If he was breast-fed, was nursing him as easy as nursing your daughter or other children? Is his appetite and growth comparable to his sister's? If he was bottle-fed, was he sensitive to any formulas? If bottle/or breastfed, did he routinely and consistently look at you while being fed? Is he picky about food in general (tastes, textures, temperatures)?

If he doesn't speak in words, does he try to articulate verbally-- by babbling, vocalizing, or mimicking others?

Does he resist or dislike sensory stimuli--dislike skin-to-skin contact or the feel of certain fabrics, does he cry when he hears loud or sudden sounds, or respond negatively to certain lighting or atmospheric conditions like room temperature?

Does he cry or scream for prolonged periods without being able to be placated by any known means of comfort? Does he cry even if he has eaten and burped, has a clean diaper is comfortably dressed?

If he has a several symptoms or more, or you just can't shake the feeling that he may have ASD, don't hesitate to contact your pediatrician, but DO NOT EXPECT a diagnosis. It may take years and years for the medical community to surmise what you know already as his mother. He may not even have ASD, which is still far more common and tends to be more pronounced in boys than girls. He may have Fragile X Syndrome, PDD or PDD-NOS, ADD or ADHD, or some combination which may be diagnosed or suggested to be what is referred to as "Developmentally Delayed" which I consider to be a medical catch-all term which means they're just not sure yet.

Just so you know, I personally researched and educated myself extensively before I diagnosed my own son before he was a year old. I figured it was Autism or possibly Fragile-X Syndrome, but was told by my pediatrician that it was "too soon to slap a label on him". He was formally diagnosed as being Autistic by the same pediatrician when he was 10 and a half years old! I was extremely unimpressed and was glad that I had not waited for the support of the medical community.

I hope this helps you. Good luck.


by Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2010 at 8:02 AM
Boys do typically develop behind girls at this age, but I think your concerns are valid. Call your local birth to three early intervention organization for an evaluation and ask the pediatrician to do an autism screen.
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by Member on Aug. 31, 2010 at 9:09 AM

Has he been evaluated by a birth to three program or the equivalant of what your state offers? Your Ped should have a number to refer you....they are free to be eval and for services it is a low monthly fee. I would start there and see where to go from there. he may be just fine or speech delayed. HELP can't hurt. My YDS is in birth to three for speech and physical therapy....he receives help and is being eval for autism as well. My ODS is autistic...high functioning in which we never received help for him until he was almost 6....big difference in catch up he has had to have.


by Co-Owner on Aug. 31, 2010 at 9:39 AM

 I wouldnt wait and see like most dr's suggest. I would have him screened now. It may be nothing but it is better to know early so if he does have Autism you can get him the services he needs.

by New Member on Aug. 31, 2010 at 3:30 PM

Thank you very much for all of your replies. I will (contrary to what i am being told) go seek an early interventionalistt and have him screened.  

badsymbiote-  He does say one word but only wih alot of coaching throughout the day will he finally say it. He never really made much eye contact but I especially took notice to it around when he was 12 months. He does not answer to his name and if i am able to make eye contact with him he will not hold it for long. And yes it oes seem like he is avoiding it. 

As for as him interacting like he should-  He won't always smile back at you and when he is playing he is kinda just playing by you than with you.....just doing his own thing. He has never pointed. I also find it difficult to engage him in his surroundings sometimes ( like when we took him to the zoo he barely looked at any of the animals the whole time we were there, he was uninterested). The only thing he seems happy doing is zoning out in front of the TV- which tv has now been practically removed fromn our home completely, they only watch educational things about 1 hour a day. He never reciprocates any social interaction and does not know any gestures ( like give me, or call the kitty, or can mommy have). 

 Never really bablbled. No unusal cryig. No sensory problems that i have noticed. He did have aweful reflux when he was a baby and we had to put him on the most expensive formula you could buy and tha made it "better" but he never stopped throwing up until he was 12 months and we switched him to milk. But trial and error we've learned it has to be lactose free. Even now if he sneaks a sip of his sister''s sippy cup ( reg milk) he will throw up. He also has exzema and we are taking him to a ped allergist soon. Has had many uppe resp infections the past winter so we alo believe he may have asthma.

No complications at birth other than slight sleep apnea. APGAR was good. He does not mimick at all yet.

Again  thank everyone for the advise. I am just going to have to go with my gut.

by Member on Aug. 31, 2010 at 5:41 PM

I wish you the best of luck and agree that it is extremely important to go through Early Intervention as soon as possible. The whole process is pretty fast :o) They really can make a huge difference - the earlier Autism is detected, the better. You know best as his mother. I knew my DD had Autism long before a dx. I hope all goes well for you!

by Bronze Member on Sep. 1, 2010 at 8:19 PM


         From what you have told us about your son, I would say, it is too early to tell.  All kids are different and you cannot compare him to your daughter.  For one thing he is a boy, and they do develope differently.  I would begin a list of things (behavoirs) that are suspect to you.  If that list seems to grow and you can really identify problem areas, then I would become more suspicious.  It would not hurt to mention your fears to his doctor.  He can be referred for testing.  As I'm sure you know, early detection is key.  I hope he is not ASD.  However, you are smart to be watchful and I would encourage your attention to the matter.  Nobody knows your kid like you do and if you continue to see signs, please don't hesitate to get him tested.  Everyone loves a pro-active parent!  Kudos to you........Beth100slide

by New Member on Sep. 2, 2010 at 11:19 AM

I have looked into early intervention and have an appt soon. i will keep everyone posted on how we make out. Has anyone ever been able to completely turn their child around from this??

by Member on Sep. 3, 2010 at 2:45 AM

Quoting twinsmom24-:

I have looked into early intervention and have an appt soon. i will keep everyone posted on how we make out. Has anyone ever been able to completely turn their child around from this??

I believe that the phrase turning the "child around" implies that there is something wrong with the child, when in fact, there isn't. The child is what he is, and he can only hope to accomplish what he can in his lifetime.

When a child is born, as parents we have so many hopes and dreams for them. Sometimes, the child is able to fulfill or exceed our hopes and expectations; sometimes, we have to lower our expectations when we realize that the child cannot possibly accomplish them.

I think that we if we love our children unconditionally, protect their innocence for as long as we can, teach them to love and laugh and live their lives in a way that is fulfilling to them, then we as parents have done all that we can do. I really believe that a child who grows up with this kind of unwavering support has the best chance for a prosperous future. Will he be rich and successful by society's standards? Maybe so. Maybe not. If, as a parent, your definition of success is to raise a child who is happy and loving despite the fact that he may not own a 5-bedroom home and drive a Lexus, then you and your child are categorically successful.

There are many Autistic people who are successful and highly accomplished, but they always remain Autistic, so though they may have acheived great deeds, they always have to work harder that their "normal" counterparts. Temple Grandin is my favorite example. She is most famous for her efforts for humane and ethical treatment of farm animals and commercial livestock--most notably cattle and chickens. She is a college graduate, a writer, an inventor and an engineer--whose greatest acheivement is the redesigning of cattle chutes in slaughterhouses, and most of the cattle slaughtered in the US is now done so in chutes of her design. She writes books on Autism from a first-person perspective, and is both very insightful and amusing. I would recommend picking up her book entitled "Moving Pictures". It is definitely worth reading. Also, HBO has made a movie based on her life--featuring Clare Danes in the starring role, and I thought it was absolutely delightful. It was well-cast, well-acted, and I thought did a pretty good job summarizing her life, accomplishments and the difficulties she faced along the way. You should check it out.

Loyal and willing subordinate of the delectable Shuuhei Hisagi.

by Head Admin on Sep. 5, 2010 at 9:47 AM


Quoting widespreadpanic:

 I wouldnt wait and see like most dr's suggest. I would have him screened now. It may be nothing but it is better to know early so if he does have Autism you can get him the services he needs.

 So true , good luck to you , in your heart you feel something isn't right , take the steps to get him in and be evaluated by a psychologistst or a Pypsychiatrist , either or .. Early intervention really is key . No mama your not paranoid always follow your heart when it comes to knowing when something is just not right .. WE ARE ALWAYS RIGHT ON WITH ARE THOUGHTS OR FEELINGS .. FAR FROM BEING PARANOID .. One smart lady to be asking question's and not just blowing it off like he is just delayed , Could be but like widespread-panic said , better to know now .. all of this for me to say what widespreadpanic just said lol. 

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