I have been reading a lot posts about the family who just had their 17th baby and it seems like a lot of people are upset about it. I was wondering what other moms with lots of kids thought about it. I have six and would love it have at least one more. I can't see myself with 17 but I would never dare to tell anyone that they shouldn't. What do you ladies think about it?
Scottie
Posted by
on Aug. 5, 2007 at 3:03 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies:
1-8 of 8 replies
by
on Aug. 5, 2007 at 8:12 AM
My mother's board elsewhere was discussing this too and the general tone there was "Whew! Good for them if they can do it, but not for me". One woman (a known ultra liberal hippy type) raised concerns that the Duggar children were too "limited" and sheltered and that they perhaps weren't being taught character building and to love and respect others. Now, knowing her the way I do, I know what she really meant was they aren't taught to embrace ALL alternative lifestyles. Well, duh!, it goes against the Bible, so of course they aren't taught like that.
Now, they are debt-free and pay cash for everything. They just built a 7,000 square foot home, also without debt. Good for them!
To save myself the trouble of re-typing everything, I'm going to paste my reply to this topic from my other board. Some of the points I made were in direct reference to things others brought up, too.
"Well, I homeschool because of the bad influences and sub-par education in the public schools. No offense to any of our teachers here, might just be a local thing, and its the curriculum I have a problem with, not the teachers.
I assign all the children to taking scheduled turns watching Michael, getting him breakfasst/lunch, changing him and general play. Of course, if he is free to hang out with me while I'm doing certain things, but not underfoot in the kitchen if there are hot liquids. Its a tiny, narrow kitchen. He does enjoy "making" bread though.
They all have chores, boys included, and quite a longer list than most people I know. Of course, most people I know only have 1 or 2 kids to clean up after. Here, it is an expected family contribution to keep things running. My own list is typed up, too. The only sexist things about my chore list are that boys are soley responsible for taking out the trash and loading the trailer for the dump. Molly does collect all the small waste baskets around the house though. Oh, and no girls are assigned to mowing the lawn or scooping dog poo. But they do have backyard pickup and patio sweeping. Boys have kitchen jobs here, too, though. They are all responsible for their own laundry, excpet Michael and I do his with mine.
I fully agree with sheltering your kids from being AMONG a lot of the things in today's degenerate society. But I also believe in letting them know what exists out there and OUR views (i.e. the Biblical one) about a lot of it. Unlike the Duggars, I don't make my girls all wear dresses (Sarah would have a FIT! LOL!), but you won't find them baring midriffs, wearing low-rise jeans or generally looking like hoochie mamas either. I saw this great website : http://www.purefashion.com/home and I wish they had a program for girls who wanted to learn everything they talk about EXCEPT modeling. I might research more and find out if there is a similar program for non-models.
Character building and treating others with love and respect is a HUGE part of Christianity, and I'm sure the Duggars spend time on that, as we do. Treating others with love and respect does not mean always agreeing with or condoning they way they live. Respect is totally different. And respecting a person and not their choices is part of learning tolerance, another word that I find is increasingly twisted these days.
I couldn't find it in the interview shown on their website (after waiting 10 minutes for the page to half load!), but I know I heard Michelle say in one of her interviews that she does make time for each child individually. Perhaps not possible on a daily basis, as I find here, but done nonetheless. I also just noticed today that she mentions the Maxwell's book, Managers of Their Homes. I didn't know they used this! I have a MOTH book, too, but haven't perfected a daily schedule yet. I also have the Maxwell's other book, Managers of Their Chores. That one was the biggest help in getting that organized finally. I decided not to print the chore cards at this time, just a master checklist, but it works so much better now!
Wow.... I went really long here... sorry. I guess I basically wanted to say that while they are a bit TOO conservative (OMG! Did I say that?? LOL!) for me, that I totally respect and envy a bit what they have. And to be debt free on top of it all! Wow! I want my girls to know that they can make a lot of choices in life, but that I will train them on how to run a household (the boys, too, in my case) so that if they choose to be wives and mothers first (as I feel is my calling) then they will be prepared. I was totally unprepared to run a house because my mother was so particular about things being done just so and nobody touching her washer and dryer. I don't resent it, but it would have been nice to learn more. They all learn to cook here, and they all fought over being the helper that I had to make a rotating schedule on who GETS to be dinner prep helper. LOL!
Okay, I better stop here before I write an entire dissertation on home and family. LOL! I guess the other thing I'm saying is that I think everyone has a different view of family and that even though they have allowed cameras into their homes, that the intent was to let people see how they live instead of making assumptions. I don't think they were open to debating their parenting or lifestyle, even if they do the documentaries. That is what a documentary is, to document something, not debate it. Despite the fact that I never started off thinking or knowing I wanted to be a mother or to how many, I could totally see myself having 17 kids. I don't think Bob agrees... LOL!
Hmm..... another paragraph after saying I'll stop. Ack! Okay. Done."
So, basically my opinion is that "too much" is in they eye of the beholder. :)
Now, they are debt-free and pay cash for everything. They just built a 7,000 square foot home, also without debt. Good for them!
To save myself the trouble of re-typing everything, I'm going to paste my reply to this topic from my other board. Some of the points I made were in direct reference to things others brought up, too.
"Well, I homeschool because of the bad influences and sub-par education in the public schools. No offense to any of our teachers here, might just be a local thing, and its the curriculum I have a problem with, not the teachers.
I assign all the children to taking scheduled turns watching Michael, getting him breakfasst/lunch, changing him and general play. Of course, if he is free to hang out with me while I'm doing certain things, but not underfoot in the kitchen if there are hot liquids. Its a tiny, narrow kitchen. He does enjoy "making" bread though.
They all have chores, boys included, and quite a longer list than most people I know. Of course, most people I know only have 1 or 2 kids to clean up after. Here, it is an expected family contribution to keep things running. My own list is typed up, too. The only sexist things about my chore list are that boys are soley responsible for taking out the trash and loading the trailer for the dump. Molly does collect all the small waste baskets around the house though. Oh, and no girls are assigned to mowing the lawn or scooping dog poo. But they do have backyard pickup and patio sweeping. Boys have kitchen jobs here, too, though. They are all responsible for their own laundry, excpet Michael and I do his with mine.
I fully agree with sheltering your kids from being AMONG a lot of the things in today's degenerate society. But I also believe in letting them know what exists out there and OUR views (i.e. the Biblical one) about a lot of it. Unlike the Duggars, I don't make my girls all wear dresses (Sarah would have a FIT! LOL!), but you won't find them baring midriffs, wearing low-rise jeans or generally looking like hoochie mamas either. I saw this great website : http://www.purefashion.com/home and I wish they had a program for girls who wanted to learn everything they talk about EXCEPT modeling. I might research more and find out if there is a similar program for non-models.
Character building and treating others with love and respect is a HUGE part of Christianity, and I'm sure the Duggars spend time on that, as we do. Treating others with love and respect does not mean always agreeing with or condoning they way they live. Respect is totally different. And respecting a person and not their choices is part of learning tolerance, another word that I find is increasingly twisted these days.
I couldn't find it in the interview shown on their website (after waiting 10 minutes for the page to half load!), but I know I heard Michelle say in one of her interviews that she does make time for each child individually. Perhaps not possible on a daily basis, as I find here, but done nonetheless. I also just noticed today that she mentions the Maxwell's book, Managers of Their Homes. I didn't know they used this! I have a MOTH book, too, but haven't perfected a daily schedule yet. I also have the Maxwell's other book, Managers of Their Chores. That one was the biggest help in getting that organized finally. I decided not to print the chore cards at this time, just a master checklist, but it works so much better now!
Wow.... I went really long here... sorry. I guess I basically wanted to say that while they are a bit TOO conservative (OMG! Did I say that?? LOL!) for me, that I totally respect and envy a bit what they have. And to be debt free on top of it all! Wow! I want my girls to know that they can make a lot of choices in life, but that I will train them on how to run a household (the boys, too, in my case) so that if they choose to be wives and mothers first (as I feel is my calling) then they will be prepared. I was totally unprepared to run a house because my mother was so particular about things being done just so and nobody touching her washer and dryer. I don't resent it, but it would have been nice to learn more. They all learn to cook here, and they all fought over being the helper that I had to make a rotating schedule on who GETS to be dinner prep helper. LOL!
Okay, I better stop here before I write an entire dissertation on home and family. LOL! I guess the other thing I'm saying is that I think everyone has a different view of family and that even though they have allowed cameras into their homes, that the intent was to let people see how they live instead of making assumptions. I don't think they were open to debating their parenting or lifestyle, even if they do the documentaries. That is what a documentary is, to document something, not debate it. Despite the fact that I never started off thinking or knowing I wanted to be a mother or to how many, I could totally see myself having 17 kids. I don't think Bob agrees... LOL!
Hmm..... another paragraph after saying I'll stop. Ack! Okay. Done."
So, basically my opinion is that "too much" is in they eye of the beholder. :)
by
on Aug. 5, 2007 at 11:15 AM
Too many , " Way too many " !!! That poor woman , what her body must be going through , she's no more than a " Baby " making machine !!!
Come on , enough is enough , Who are they trying to kid ? I am the mother of six and I know that even though they go on television and act as this " perfect " family they are not fooling me !!! With just 6 , my house is a "Zoo" at times ( I'm sure you all know what I mean ) and when I throw in my "6" grand children that makes "12" !!! It just gets crazy around here !!!
My issue is with , okay she has baby after baby and it becomes the 'older" childrens' job to help to raise them !!! If she thinks that she is this "Super" Mom than don't force the other children to parent these babies that you keep making !!! Let them have their childhood , after all , they grow up so fast and will be parents soon enough themselves !!!
Come on , enough is enough , Who are they trying to kid ? I am the mother of six and I know that even though they go on television and act as this " perfect " family they are not fooling me !!! With just 6 , my house is a "Zoo" at times ( I'm sure you all know what I mean ) and when I throw in my "6" grand children that makes "12" !!! It just gets crazy around here !!!
My issue is with , okay she has baby after baby and it becomes the 'older" childrens' job to help to raise them !!! If she thinks that she is this "Super" Mom than don't force the other children to parent these babies that you keep making !!! Let them have their childhood , after all , they grow up so fast and will be parents soon enough themselves !!!
by
on Aug. 5, 2007 at 11:23 AM
Quoting bealetonh:
Too many , " Way too many " !!! That poor woman , what her body must be going through , she's no more than a " Baby " making machine !!!
Come on , enough is enough , Who are they trying to kid ? I am the mother of six and I know that even though they go on television and act as this " perfect " family they are not fooling me !!! With just 6 , my house is a "Zoo" at times ( I'm sure you all know what I mean ) and when I throw in my "6" grand children that makes "12" !!! It just gets crazy around here !!!
My issue is with , okay she has baby after baby and it becomes the 'older" childrens' job to help to raise them !!! If she thinks that she is this "Super" Mom than don't force the other children to parent these babies that you keep making !!! Let them have their childhood , after all , they grow up so fast and will be parents soon enough themselves !!!
SHE has never claimed to be a "Super Mom". Not in any of the shows have I ever heard her use that or any similar term to apply to herself. And having older siblings help with younger ones is the norm everywhere but here in selfish America where self comes before everything. Helping with some daily activities of young children is hardly the same as "raising" them either. If that as the case, then everyone who has a child in daycare is guilty of having others "raise" their children, not just help with them. Of course, everyone is entitle to their own opinion, but I think saying that she is nothing but a "baby making machine" is extremely insulting. I'm sure there are people who say the same thing about me and even about you with "only" 6. But hey.... that's just my opinion, too.
by
New Member
on Aug. 6, 2007 at 11:43 AM
God is the creator and He is perfectly capable of not using them to make any more babies when He wants. Obviously He doesn't think they have too many. It is a modern day notion that WE must control our family size. In thousands of years of human history, only in the last 70 have people decided we must take control and it wasn't even a thought 100 years ago.
by
New Member
on Aug. 18, 2007 at 3:36 PM
Quoting MyGiftsFromGod:
God is the creator and He is perfectly capable of not using them to make any more babies when He wants. Obviously He doesn't think they have too many. It is a modern day notion that WE must control our family size. In thousands of years of human history, only in the last 70 have people decided we must take control and it wasn't even a thought 100 years ago.
YOu said it all right there!!! Well put! and I sooooooo love the duggars, their children are so wonderful as well and very respectful/ awsome job they have done with them
by
New Member
on Sep. 30, 2007 at 10:39 PM
This is just me throwing some things around, or just "talking out loud". I don't think it's fair that anyone judge anyone else's decision for their family. Now if the Duggar's were living off welfare and standing in line for "gov't cheese" and still making babies left and right, I might have a problem with that, whether they had 17 babies or only a few. But these people don't ask anything of anyone and are probably in a better financial place than most of us. If their desire is to continue making babies, then so be it. Now, if it were my family, I don't see a problem with kids have chores around the house, Lord knows my kids do. And I don't see a problem with the older ones helping out with the younger ones, mine help me all the time put shoes on younger ones, buckle them in carseats, etc....but when you have so many kids that one older child is specifically assigned to a younger one, to the extent that possibly even the mother child bond is replaced, I would think twice about that. I have such a hard time finding time for all of my 6 (and that's not a lot in this group of women), how can Mrs Duggar find time to keep that bond with each and every one of her children? Like I said....just thinking out loud. I grew up knowing a lot of families like this, cuz I was homeschooled and belonged to a group of homeschoolers, seems like there are many large families in the homeschool group. I also don't agree with the sheltering, not giving the teenagers the experience they need with dating and such. How will these Duggar children ever find a suitable spouse when they are homeschooled and, I believe, they have church privately in their home. No contact with any suitable future partners. But, this is in fact a free country and they are free to raise their children anyway they want. I just don't think that lifestyle would ever suit my family.
1-8 of 8 replies
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Advertisement
- alphamommy
on Aug. 5, 2007 at 3:03 AM