Its None of Your Business!

[KamiLynn]

This is kind of a rant/spin-off post of another comment in the SAHM group on CafeMom. Anyway, I digress...

Since when is it anyone's business how large your family is?? I have seen several posts about people with large families given a hard time by their own friends and relatives about when they should stop having kids!!! IMHO, if you can provide for the kids you have or want (financially and emotionally), then who's business is it anyway?! One of the TACKIEST things a person can ask is if you are done having kids! FIL actually said that now that we have a boy, DH is going to get fixed!!! Um, really?! Maybe he should talk to his son about that detail...b/c he has NO plans to ever get that done. MIL and my father have both made similar comments.

I'm pregnant with #3 and you would have thought it was my 10th! DH & I are more than financially prepared to handle ALL of our kids, give them love, attention, and our time together, and if we want four or five kids, then we will have them!! :P (DH says he wants five but I said lets play it by ear once #3 arrives LOL).

PS I come from a family of six (I have three sisters) so I know firsthand how difficult it can be, so give me a little credit people!

[MrsManners]

It's totally inappropriate for someone to tell you to stop having children.  Even if they are family.  You are right, only you know what you are capable of handling both emotionally and financially.  My sister has four children, I love each of them from the earth to the moon and back.  I have one.  We will only have one, I get ridiculed for this constantly.  How can you be so selfish for having only one child, he won't have any support as an adult etc. etc.  Well, let me tell you what most people don't know and why they shouldn't say things like this, we had problems conceiving, it took us 7 years to have our son and cost nearly $40K.  We are still paying for him and he is 3 years old.  Aside from the fact that we can't afford to make another baby, there are medical reasons that I shouldn't carry another.  Now, would I love to have more, yes I would.  Does it hurt when people say that to me, yep it sure does.  The point being that it is truly no one elses business and it is wildly wrong to ask or make comments about the size of a persons family because you don't know what their personal situation is.  You are right on the money!  So sorry you had to hear that and congratulations on your upcoming third!  I think it is great to see people who have all the love in the world to give having families of all sizes!