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Son with ADHD-social issues

Posted by on Aug. 29, 2012 at 4:04 PM
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Hello, my name is Angela and I have an 8 year old son with ADHD. He has been on meds for a year and seems to be doing better but at times, I feel as if I am right back where I started. We have great days, we have good days, and then we have those many bad days. I count my blessings when I have a good day. I try to read as many books as I can looking for answers. I know how important it is to have a TEAM in place. We are currently on our 2nd Psychiatrist and 2nd Psychologist. The current ones are better than the first but I am still frustrated that they are not getting to the route of the problem. I find that I do much more of the leg work than they do in trying to navifate this ADHD/behavioral issue condition. During one of my sessions with the psychiatrist, I kept telling her that my son seems very angry. I kept using that word for a number of sessions. My son was on 18 mgs of Concerta and 4 mgs of Intuniv. I felt as if the stims were too much. I asked the doctor to lower the stims and we went from Concerta to 10mgs of Ritalin. I noticed that my son was less angry. Then over the phone I felt as if I wanted to lower the stims even more. We retuced the stims to 5mg. When I went to visit with her, I mentioned that he was no longer angry and she said, well sometimes the stims cause someone to be angry. Well, what had I been saying all along? This is why I feel it is so crucial that the parents are so involved in their child's therapy.

Like many kids with ADHD, my son does have issues when he gets into a group. I had been looking all summer for a social behavioral group for my son but would hit a brick wall everytime I called a place that I found on the Internet. Has anyone in the San Mateo, CA area found anything that might be helpful for kids with ADHD in a group setting? I am also looking for a support group since I am new to the area.

Thanks for any recommendations.

by on Aug. 29, 2012 at 4:04 PM
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Replies (1-4):
rouzie64
by on Aug. 30, 2012 at 9:56 AM

WIth the lower stims, how did he do in school? is he able to focus and listen?

 Also, does he have any side effects with the inutiv? My 12  son was on the 4mgs but it gave him headaches and he was really tired... the dr lowered it to 2mgs..

my boy is angrier on the the stims but at the lower dose he did worse in school. so, we deal with the angry outbursts.   I do not like like the pycharitrist. he is ok for my 16yr son, in and out, hand him the rx but for my 12, he doesnt ask questions.  I am looking for child specialist, now.

momkelly2
by Head Admin Catherine on Aug. 30, 2012 at 1:12 PM

I had some issues with my kids too..   don't think there were official, programs for them back then.    but here is what I did.  

watched TV   ....  I know your thinking she is nuts.. but     I watched too..   picked things like  "Thats So Raven"   or    the twins that live in a hotel..  or  "Lizzy"    I know there are many more now days..  but they are good shows.   and someone always gets into trouble and out of it in a half hour..    and  lesson learned no harm done, kind of thing.   

However I didn't assume that lessons were learned automatically..   at least with my kids, they were oblivious.   so   When I saw something wrong.. or maybe not behavior that is best or was thoughtless ..   I pointed out the behavior..    and then we talked about what might  be better choices.  

the best part of this was it wasn't about them ..  it wasn't about their friends..   both situations tend to bring on defensive attitudes...   and understandably so..  this was about a Character on a show , which meant they didn't have emotions tied to them and were much more open to the discussion and learning

at first I talked..    and pointed out what was going on ..   later I started asking what was wrong with the situation  actually I asked,  "whats wrong with that picture?"   and waited for them to tell me.   and we talked about better choices..        eventually  I began to asked what would have been  a better choice(s) .       and it worked.    both of my kids  started coming home..   with statements ...  like "you won't believe what a  kid at school did!"      

and they also became more thoughtful  more aware of  their behavior and their choices and how those choices effect others around them..       it takes time.. but for  us it worked.   

anghouston
by on Sep. 1, 2012 at 11:42 AM

My son just started school and I am not sure how well he is doing. My husband briefly asked the teacher yesterday how he is doing and he said he is having a hard time finishing his work. Regardless of the reduction in stims, he had the same issue last year when he was on 18 mg of Concerta. My son has a hard time beginning any project/homework without me nagging him. I plan to meet with the teacher, see if we can find a way to get him to do his work in class. As far as the Intuniv, my son did complain of frequent headaches last year but they seem to have subsided. He still is on 4 mg of Intuniv but does not seem tired at all. I think that is the only way he can calm down is if he is o the Intuniv.

anghouston
by on Sep. 1, 2012 at 11:47 AM

Does anyone live in the San Mateo/Foster City, CA area? I would love to meet with parents who have kids with ADHD or behavioral issues. I know that CHADD offers groups but they are not within my area. I have asked my Psychiatrist and Psychologists if they have other parents that have kids with ADHD and they are reluctant to provide that information which I can understand. Yet I feel that most parents would welcome the opportunity to share stories and solutions to problems they are having with their kids. As much as I repsect their profession, we are with our kids all the time and the limited time that they are with them does not allow them to see our kids in a normal setting.

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