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Humorscope April 13

Posted by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 3:32 AM
  • 9 Replies

Aries (March 21 - April 19)
You will be on your way downtown today, when you will be struck by an odd thought. Fortunately it will bounce harmlessly off you.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Today you will irritate people. In fact, you'll irritate yourself.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
That bad smell in the closet will get stronger. Time to investigate.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
A large cement dragon will appear to be following you, although you'll never actually see it move. Don't you just hate that?
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Do not leave home without a ball of twine, today. You won't actually need it, but it'll make you feel better to be prepared.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Your neighbors will have a wild party, which you'll catch glimpses of through the open window. You'll know you shouldn't watch, but it's just hard to imagine how people can do that, especially on a trampoline.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
You will attain your dream of having your own cooking show, but it will become tiresome when you have to battle your way past people dressed as chickens to get into the studio each day.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
To your chagrin and horror, you will find yourself humming along with "muzac" in the grocery store. It's the beginning of the long slow slide, I'm afraid. Next stop: collecting "nick nacks."
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Do not snitch a jelly donut today, when nobody is looking. The chocolate frosted one is much better.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
This might be a good time to refer to your roommate as "Watson" and say things like "The game's afoot!". Eventually, you'll be able to reconstruct an entire evening's events from a spilled drop of raspberry vinaigrette.
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
Remember: loose lips sink ships. The really strange thing is, nobody's ever been able to explain to me why ships have lips in the first place, especially if they're that risky.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Everyone will stare at you like deer in headlights this week at the office. Actually, you will later decide that driving your car around inside the office may not be your best-ever idea.

by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 3:32 AM
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Replies (1-9):
Maries_Mom23
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 7:00 AM
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
Remember: loose lips sink ships. The really strange thing is, nobody's ever been able to explain to me why ships have lips in the first place, especially if they're that risky.
frndlyfn
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 7:51 AM

LOL  took me a while to understand that saying.

DanielleK21
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 8:37 AM

 LOL its okay it can follow me.

goorob
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 9:10 AM

Well I know where a cement dragon is......

1busymomma03
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 10:14 AM

LOL. I really hope I don't irritate people today.. I guess it's a good thing that I don't have to be around anyone but the kids today.. I would hate to irritate too many people. LOL

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Today you will irritate people. In fact, you'll irritate yourself.
4kidz916
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 11:20 AM

Your neighbors will have a wild party, which you'll catch glimpses of through the open window. You'll know you shouldn't watch, but it's just hard to imagine how people can do that, especially on a trampoline.

Well, I only have one neighbor and they don't have a trampoline, but they do have a hammock.  I bet that work during a wild party.  lol

fineyouguyswin
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 12:27 PM

lol

 

Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
This might be a good time to refer to your roommate as "Watson" and say things like "The game's afoot!". Eventually, you'll be able to reconstruct an entire evening's events from a spilled drop of raspberry vinaigrette.
melaniecerise
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 3:52 PM
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
Remember: loose lips sink ships. The really strange thing is, nobody's ever been able to explain to me why ships have lips in the first place, especially if they're that risky.
That is some heavy thinking
MistressMinerva
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 4:23 PM
  • Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
    Remember: loose lips sink ships. The really strange thing is, nobody's ever been able to explain to me why ships have lips in the first place, especially if they're that risky.

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