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This will be a post that everyone can share funny stories, jokes, emails and pictures.

by on May. 1, 2012 at 3:52 AM
Replies (71-75):
by on May. 28, 2012 at 12:48 AM


 If you have ever testified in court, you might wish you could  have been as sharp as this policeman. 
He was being cross examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credibility.    
Q: 'Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?'   
A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.'   
Q: 'Officer, who provided this description? '   
A: 'The officer who responded to the scene.'   
Q: 'A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?'  
A: 'Yes, sir. With my life.'   
Q: 'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?'   
A: 'Yes sir, we do!'   
Q: 'And do you have a locker in the room?'   
A: 'Yes sir, I do.'   
Q: 'And do you have a lock on your locker?'   
A: 'Yes sir.'    
Q: 'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with the same officers?'   
A: 'You see, sir, we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.' 

The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's 'Best Comeback' line, and we think he'll win.

by on May. 29, 2012 at 2:20 AM

You don't need to have a cat to see the funny in this one. You don't even have to
like 'em!

We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Year's Eve Party. We turned
on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet
and put the cat in the backyard.
We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and
we opened the front door to leave the house. As we walked out the door, the
cat we had put out in the yard, scooted back into the house. We didn't want
the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. My wife
went on out to the taxi, while I went back inside to get the cat. The cat
ran upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, my wife didn't want the driver to know that the house
would be empty for the night, so she explained to the taxi driver
that I would be out soon, saying 'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to
my mother.'
A few minutes later, I got into the cab. 'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as
we drove away.. 'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke
her ass with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so
I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her
from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw
her out into the back yard! She'd better not shit in the vegetable garden
The silence in the cab was deafening.

by on May. 29, 2012 at 2:21 AM

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling.

When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing
Every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married.

On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness,
Feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs
She had endured.

Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the
Therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to
Stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband
Watched - with a raised eyebrow.

The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife
Needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?"

"Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on
Fridays, I play golf."

by on May. 29, 2012 at 2:22 AM

Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: 
'And what do you think is the best thing 
about being 104?' the reporter asked..  
She simply replied, 'No peer pressure

by on May. 30, 2012 at 3:44 AM

funny cat pictures - An ai has a happi

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