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just converting

Posted by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 2:44 PM
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so I am in the first steps to becoming Muslim and I was wondering how it is for women with children from before they converted how they adjusted how the other women accepted them and what not. Im worried that maybe the other women will look down on me and maybe not want my kids playing with their kids i know in Islam it says that when you convert all your sins are forgive but were all human is there still judgement and is it as bad as ever were else or maybe am i just thinking to much into it?
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 2:44 PM
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Replies (1-3):
Nay26
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 6:42 PM

Masha'Allah! I converted a couple months ago. My kids knew more about Islam than I did because their dad is Muslim so they weren't that upset or confused. They were a little upset because we were no longer celebrating christmas and easter but they also look forward to Eid so they got over it. As far as feeling judged by other Muslim women, I haven't felt judged at all. My kids have friends that live next door that are also Muslim and their mom never had a problems with them playing together before I converted so she definitley didn't have a problem once I converted.

squishman
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 12:51 PM
thank you, my husband was raised Muslim but his mom was not part of it just his dad and his family. my husband converted for his ex wife to Mormonism but its not for us. Ive been thinking about converting and gettin him back to his routs and what not and Ive been reading up on it all and reading some of what the Prophet said and what the Quorn says and Ive been feeling something in my heart that says this is what is right and true something I never felt about any thing else ive ever read, but I'm worried because my kids are not my husbands and not from the same dad (I have a bit of a bad past) so Im worried they wont be accepted. I'm also worried that the women will be like how they are at our old church wanting nothing to with with me. can any one offer any kinda advice or anything
LivingIslam
by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 12:09 AM
5 moms liked this

 Salam Alaykum

Don't share personal information about your past, yourself or your family.  Have polite conversation with people and focus on going to Friday prayers (jummah) and events where you can learn about Islam by hearing the Imam lecture and so forth.   

When entering the masjid greet those sisters you pass with a gentle smile and say Salam Alaykum. 

When someone inquires as to how you are the Islamic response is alhamduellah, how are you?

Some might ask if you are a revert or for how long and it's fine to say yes, just recently alhamdulellah.

But, you don't want to go into anymore detail.  No one needs to know more than that.

It's not really proper manners (adab) to discuss your past or that of your family.  The Quran instructs us not to talk about our past.  Part of this is because it only causes people problems and fitnah.   Allah knows that part of our weakness is that we tend to judge others and make assumptions about people based on their history.  This is why our religion actually warns us about what we reveal.  Muslims are also instructed in the Quran to conceal their sins.   We don't go to confession.  We are to seek out Allah for his forgiveness and make sure we follow up with a good deed and not return to the sin.

Be sure to wear hijab to the masjid even if you have not yet taken that step.  Wear an opaque and loose fitting long sleeve shirt and long skirt that falls to your ankles.  You will feel comfortable this way knowing that you are dressed appropriately for the masjid.  Granted a Muslim woman should dress this way 24/7 but you are a new revert so changing your wardrobe may still be in progress. 

All Muslim women have issues.  Divorce and shameful things happen in our communities however we don't discuss our personal business on a public forum.  Your not likely to see a Muslim woman on the Dr. Phil show airing all her dirty laundry in public.  And, if you think about it it's not really dignified or admirable to tell all. 

If you remember that you have nothing to prove and just be yourself I'm sure you will get along just fine with the others inshallah. 

Remember, you are there to grow in your Islam not to please others.

 

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