Why do women go for the bad boy type?

[EvilPrincess]

I'm curious to see different opinions as to why women knowingly get with bad guys.

As someone who always falls for the bad guys, here's my take.

I know I'm probably wrong but in my mind a relationship with a bad boy is exciting. Whereas a good guy type is boring.

I also think for some women, including me, have some sort of daddy issue. I didn't have a dad growing up. I knowingly get with older, dangerous men.
In my case, I get with men that are almost a carbon copy of my dad. He left when I was 4. My mom shielded me from his behavior. I never knew what he really was until I was an adult.

Yet, every guy I've ever been with, according to my mom and family members, is just a younger version of my dad.

My sons' father and my last boyfriend, 2 different guys, were identical. Down to their jobs and illegal activities.

I can point out a bad guy in 5 seconds of meeting, but I still enter into a relationship with him.

I know why I do it. I have first hand knowledge as to why it's a bad idea. I just cannot stop myself from being attracted to the type and lifestyle.

I'm curious to see what your opinions are, if you do the same and your theories as to why.

[FrogSalad]

I think it's so (general) you can focus on 'fixing' him instead of fixing yourself.

At least that's why I used to be attracted to bad boys.  I'm reformed, though.

[ejsmom4604]

I think it's the danger quality, the excitement of it. I have been with a couple of those types, but honestly in the end it gets boring after a bit. I have found a lot more fun and excitement and happiness in the long run with my nice guy husband. :)

[_Bama_]

I dont know....  I just got off the phone with my husband.... he spent part of the night with a gun under his pillow because one of his crazy co workers beat the holy hell out of his girlfriend and she came to my husband to get away from him.   He was afraid to tell me he let a woman sleep in his travel trailer last night....  I said what were you to do... 

Toxic relationships..... im happy im not in one.

[Rachel4u]

For me it was simple.  

I didn't feel like I deserved any better.  No nice/good/faithful/loyal guy would have me.  I was living a life at the time that all but assured this was true.  It took help from God but I had to fix me first.

[JoshRachelsMAMA]

It's connected to the dominant male figure of your childhood

[hippiechic980]

This why I have done it my whole life...would you care to share how to stop the cycle?? I am still doing it and just can't seem to help myself.

Quoting FrogSalad:

I think it's so (general) you can focus on 'fixing' him instead of fixing yourself.

At least that's why I used to be attracted to bad boys.  I'm reformed, though.

[candlegal]

My husband was a bad boy.  He was very exciting.  He did finally grow up and mature and turned into a really good husband and father.

We both had self esteem issues when we got together.  He is still very exciting, just directs it differently now

[candlegal]

It certainly is.  My father was a very domineering control freak.   My mother told me one time how my husband was just like my father.   I was very upset because I did not like my father very much.  I realized she was right.   After my husband changed, I realized what my father could have been like had he ever quit drinking.

Quoting JoshRachelsMAMA:

It's connected to the dominant male figure of your childhood

[PhyllisGB]

I was drawn to the bad guys as well.  However, my dad was loving; a pastor (!) so I think the model was my crazy brother, the stereotypical preacher's son.

I did, however, marry a guy like dear old dad.  :D

[laurenb1]

I've always wondered this. I go for the hot geek/rocker that usually come off as sweet or shy. And it's because my first real relationship was a bad boy and I never want to go through that again. I've lectured so many friends about this telling them to give a nice boy a chance because they are not "losers" and that these bad boys are the real losers because they will go nowhere in life.