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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road

Posted by on May. 3, 2012 at 7:34 PM
  • 29 Replies
5 moms liked this

 

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
...
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, That chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right from Day One! - That every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road... What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

GILLIGAN: The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail, the chicken would be lost. The chicken would be lost!

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

(stolen from FB)


Different, but not less~Temple Grandin

by on May. 3, 2012 at 7:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SLTmom
by Silver Member on May. 3, 2012 at 7:46 PM
Haha!!!! I needed that laugh! Thanks. ;-)

"where's my gun" ......lol

"I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief"  Gerry Spence

survivorinohio
by René on May. 3, 2012 at 7:48 PM

Awesome!  I needed that.

How far you go in life depends on your being: tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of both the weak and strong.  Because someday in life you would have been one or all of these.  GeorgeWashingtonCarver


Bieg9093
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 7:56 PM
3 moms liked this

 You should add a poll to see how many people sang Gilligan's answer aloud.  Go ahead and put me down for a yes.

-Eilish-
by Gold Member on May. 3, 2012 at 7:59 PM
1 mom liked this

The Libertarian: Who cares why?! It's HIS choice!

whoopsie16
by Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:03 PM

bahahaha I like Dick Cheny's response!

sneffy014
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:27 PM

laughing

sneffy014
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:28 PM

I might steal this for my facebook! Hope you don't mind :)

TruthSeeker.
by Milami on May. 3, 2012 at 8:29 PM

 

Quoting sneffy014:

I might steal this for my facebook! Hope you don't mind :)

 Of course not! That's where I got it:)

Veni.Vidi.Vici.
by on May. 3, 2012 at 8:30 PM

*heart* this

JamesMom714
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:32 PM
Ditto... I sang it... Twice.


Quoting Bieg9093:

 You should add a poll to see how many people sang Gilligan's answer aloud.  Go ahead and put me down for a yes.


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