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S/O Remarrying after a divorce equals living in sin

Posted by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:11 AM
  • 533 Replies
5 moms liked this

 

Poll

Question: Have you been married by a pastor for a second or more marriage or have attempted to get married? Did the pastor refuse you for no other reason that the fact it is not your first marriage?

Options:

The pastor married you

The pastor refused you

You had a pastor deny you and another marry you


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Total Votes: 256

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So according to the scriptures if you remarry after you divorce for non sexual immorality (or if the spouse leaves you) then you are living in sin. So if they church is head set on condemning homosexuals and not allowing their marriage why does the church not do the same to those who are divorced and possibly remarried?

1 Corinthians 7:15 ESV / 81 helpful votes

But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.

Matthew 5:32 ESV / 64 helpful votes

But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Matthew 19:9 ESV / 45 helpful votes

And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

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EDIT TO ADD: These or NOT my beliefs. I myself is on my 3rd marriage and according to these scriptures that would mean I'm living in sin. So I'm not bashing anyone in any shape or form. Although I am a Christian I don't take the bible literally and find it very subjective. I personally think it's more than ok to divorce an remarry. My only point is to suggest that the majority of Christian American's are condemning one lifestyle to the point of refusing to allow them to be married even out side the church while practicing help others according to the literal scripture to live in sin.

A couple things I see that are being said. People are saying it's ok to divorce an abusive husband. Why I certainly believe that is true I have been unable to find literal scripture for it. If you know a scripture then please share. Second thing is people are saying you can divorce a non believer. Like many of you I was raised being told that too. But I have read scripture that actually says NOT to leave the unbeliever. If you have a literal scripture you would like to share that says otherwise please do.

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 1 Corinthians 7:12

I would also like to add this verse for those that think it's a forgivable sin to remarry and stay with that spouse.

To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife. 1 Corinthians 7:10-11

And there is one person in here that's a little hung up on the word adultery being used opposed adulteress. Ok so here you go. It gets used here. And this verse also tells you how you will be free of this sin. Your 1st husband dies you will then be allowed to be with your second therefore able to receive forgiveness. It was also stated that the bible doesn't tell what to do. The verse I posted above says to the woman to remain unmarried or reconciled with her husband.

For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. 3 So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man. Romans 7:2-3





 Jaliyah  My video here

by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:11 AM
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Replies (1-10):
punky3175
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:15 AM
78 moms liked this

I will just say because of these kinds of debates, I'm glad I'm no longer a Christian. 

GraceHudson
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:16 AM
bump


Woodbabe
by Woodie on May. 18, 2012 at 10:17 AM
3 moms liked this

Excellent points!

Euphoric
by Bazinga! on May. 18, 2012 at 10:21 AM
4 moms liked this

cat 

survivorinohio
by René on May. 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM
8 moms liked this

I have been told that.  I have read that.

Good question.  Really the bottom line is we are not supposed to try and police the spirits of others.

How far you go in life depends on your being: tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of both the weak and strong.  Because someday in life you would have been one or all of these.  GeorgeWashingtonCarver


ReginaStar
by Gold Member on May. 18, 2012 at 10:28 AM
6 moms liked this

IDK it just seems weird to me. Pastors Remarry people in their church who are living in sin (according to the bible) but yet try and keep people who they feel are living in sin from being able to marry OUTSIDE their church. It seems to me the reasons are far more than "the bible". Like their PERSONAL beliefs not just religious ones.





 Jaliyah  My video here

punky3175
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:35 AM
2 moms liked this

Then I will ask - where did they develop those personal beliefs?  Was it through the church they attended and is a reflection of what the church told them for so many years?  Doesn't it fall into the "this is how we've always done it" and "if it ain't broke don't fix it" kind of deals?  Because in their minds - it isn't broke.  Being homosexual is a sin and it's not their (pastors/church) job to change their (pastors/church) opinions, it's the homosexual's job to turn their back on their sin. 

The church is willing (maybe not Catholic church) to adjust to current times on things such as heterosexual marriage because they realize society has changed a great deal and if they tell women they must stay married to abusive husbands then there will be a backlash and they may lose parishioners.  That's the last thing they want, right?  So in order to keep parishioners and perhaps draw more in, they've become more accepting of single parents (who are that way by choice), divorced parents etc.  They even have "singles" bible studies and mixers to encourage single parents to attend and maybe even find a new spouse in the church.

All of this is just my opinion from my personal experience in multiple Christian denominational churches over the years so take it for what you will.

Quoting ReginaStar:

IDK it just seems weird to me. Pastors Remarry people in their church who are living in sin (according to the bible) but yet try and keep people who they feel are living in sin from being able to marry OUTSIDE their church. It seems to me the reasons are far more "the bible". Like their PERSONAL beliefs not just religious ones.

 

ReginaStar
by Gold Member on May. 18, 2012 at 10:41 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting punky3175:

Then I will ask - where did they develop those personal beliefs?  Was it through the church they attended and is a reflection of what the church told them for so many years?  Doesn't it fall into the "this is how we've always done it" and "if it ain't broke don't fix it" kind of deals?  Because in their minds - it isn't broke.  Being homosexual is a sin and it's not their (pastors/church) job to change their (pastors/church) opinions, it's the homosexual's job to turn their back on their sin. 

The church is willing (maybe not Catholic church) to adjust to current times on things such as heterosexual marriage because they realize society has changed a great deal and if they tell women they must stay married to abusive husbands then there will be a backlash and they may lose parishioners.  That's the last thing they want, right?  So in order to keep parishioners and perhaps draw more in, they've become more accepting of single parents (who are that way by choice), divorced parents etc.  They even have "singles" bible studies and mixers to encourage single parents to attend and maybe even find a new spouse in the church.

All of this is just my opinion from my personal experience in multiple Christian denominational churches over the years so take it for what you will.

Quoting ReginaStar:

IDK it just seems weird to me. Pastors Remarry people in their church who are living in sin (according to the bible) but yet try and keep people who they feel are living in sin from being able to marry OUTSIDE their church. It seems to me the reasons are far more "the bible". Like their PERSONAL beliefs not just religious ones.

 

It appears to me that as time goes on things that the bible condemns or supposedly condemns becomes more acceptable or not acceptable in the larger society. Therefore people starting inserting their personal beliefs that they don't think there is anything wrong it (cause they were raised in a way that they were taught it was not wrong their more open to seeing is as not wrong) and try and find ways to excuse it. (That was a sin in a different time an place but not today). But those that are not willing to see it as morally ok on a personal level they use the bible to back their condemnation.





 Jaliyah  My video here

punky3175
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:51 AM
6 moms liked this

Couldn't it be a result of the fact that people simply better understand the world around them? 

When the Christian church was formed and the bible written, there was no understanding of why people were attracted to the same sex (brain chemistry etc) so the people who were attracted to the same sex were viewed as "wrong" and "being sinners."  Today there has been much research done and people who ARE gay have been able to come forward and say "I don't CHOOSE to be attracted to the same sex.  I was just made this way." 

Society as a whole no longer accepts condemning someone for the way they were born.  Most members of society (I really hope it's most anyway) will not condemn a homosexual for the way they were born any more than they would condemn be for being half Puerto Rican, having freckles and being female. 

When the Bible was written, women were not considered equal.  We have proven time and again that we are indeed just as good as men (I'd venture to say better personally :D) and just as capable in pretty much all aspects as men are.

Quoting ReginaStar:


Quoting punky3175:

Then I will ask - where did they develop those personal beliefs?  Was it through the church they attended and is a reflection of what the church told them for so many years?  Doesn't it fall into the "this is how we've always done it" and "if it ain't broke don't fix it" kind of deals?  Because in their minds - it isn't broke.  Being homosexual is a sin and it's not their (pastors/church) job to change their (pastors/church) opinions, it's the homosexual's job to turn their back on their sin. 

The church is willing (maybe not Catholic church) to adjust to current times on things such as heterosexual marriage because they realize society has changed a great deal and if they tell women they must stay married to abusive husbands then there will be a backlash and they may lose parishioners.  That's the last thing they want, right?  So in order to keep parishioners and perhaps draw more in, they've become more accepting of single parents (who are that way by choice), divorced parents etc.  They even have "singles" bible studies and mixers to encourage single parents to attend and maybe even find a new spouse in the church.

All of this is just my opinion from my personal experience in multiple Christian denominational churches over the years so take it for what you will.

Quoting ReginaStar:

IDK it just seems weird to me. Pastors Remarry people in their church who are living in sin (according to the bible) but yet try and keep people who they feel are living in sin from being able to marry OUTSIDE their church. It seems to me the reasons are far more "the bible". Like their PERSONAL beliefs not just religious ones.

 

It appears to me that as time goes on things that the bible condemns or supposedly condemns becomes more acceptable or not acceptable in the larger society. Therefore people starting inserting their personal beliefs that they don't think there is anything wrong it (cause they were raised in a way that they were taught it was not wrong their more open to seeing is as not wrong) and try and find ways to excuse it. (That was a sin in a different time an place but not today). But those that are not willing to see it as morally ok on a personal level they use the bible to back their condemnation.

 

punky3175
by on May. 18, 2012 at 10:53 AM
5 moms liked this

I'll also add that society being more accepting is a result of more and more people not being scared to 1) walk away from the Christian church and 2) proudly claim that they are another religion and refuse to let Christianity dictate how they view the world around them.

ETA: 3) people are no longer scared to question the teachings they were raised with and the validity of those teachings.

*I do not hate Christianity or Christians so please don't think any of my replies are meant in that way. 

Quoting ReginaStar:


Quoting punky3175:

Then I will ask - where did they develop those personal beliefs?  Was it through the church they attended and is a reflection of what the church told them for so many years?  Doesn't it fall into the "this is how we've always done it" and "if it ain't broke don't fix it" kind of deals?  Because in their minds - it isn't broke.  Being homosexual is a sin and it's not their (pastors/church) job to change their (pastors/church) opinions, it's the homosexual's job to turn their back on their sin. 

The church is willing (maybe not Catholic church) to adjust to current times on things such as heterosexual marriage because they realize society has changed a great deal and if they tell women they must stay married to abusive husbands then there will be a backlash and they may lose parishioners.  That's the last thing they want, right?  So in order to keep parishioners and perhaps draw more in, they've become more accepting of single parents (who are that way by choice), divorced parents etc.  They even have "singles" bible studies and mixers to encourage single parents to attend and maybe even find a new spouse in the church.

All of this is just my opinion from my personal experience in multiple Christian denominational churches over the years so take it for what you will.

Quoting ReginaStar:

IDK it just seems weird to me. Pastors Remarry people in their church who are living in sin (according to the bible) but yet try and keep people who they feel are living in sin from being able to marry OUTSIDE their church. It seems to me the reasons are far more "the bible". Like their PERSONAL beliefs not just religious ones.

 

It appears to me that as time goes on things that the bible condemns or supposedly condemns becomes more acceptable or not acceptable in the larger society. Therefore people starting inserting their personal beliefs that they don't think there is anything wrong it (cause they were raised in a way that they were taught it was not wrong their more open to seeing is as not wrong) and try and find ways to excuse it. (That was a sin in a different time an place but not today). But those that are not willing to see it as morally ok on a personal level they use the bible to back their condemnation.

 

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