Lawd knows, the first few years were hell. 2 kids at 18. Mistakes were made, grave mistakes. But, here we are with everything going amazingly well. Those mistakes have worked themselves out over time, my kids have every opportunity available out there, & are bright, successful children. They suffer no ill effects from their time spent living in 'poverty'. In fact, because of those experiences, they are truly empathetic to their classmates who have less than they do.
I truly feel like you view things in black & white, entirely too much. What about all of the positive lessons that come from going through hard times? What about all those tough times that build character?