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If your child...

Posted by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:51 PM
  • 24 Replies

grows up to have different views of the world, different ideological beliefs, and/or even different religious beliefs (or lack thereof), how would you handle this? Would you be proud that they have challenged what they've been taught, worried that they were somehow brainwashed... frustrated, proud??? 


I stated in another thread that if one or both of my boys grew up and thought exactly like me that I would be worried. But I have to admit if one of them became a polar opposite of me I would have a very hard time getting along with them!! lol


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by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:51 PM
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Sisteract
by Whoopie on Jun. 30, 2012 at 2:54 PM
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They have.

I am proud of who each one of them has become.

Children are not possessions-

I tend to LOL at those with young kids who believe that they alone control or can dictate outcomes-

heidimoose134
by Momma Moose on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:00 PM
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Quoting Sisteract:

They have.

I am proud of who each one of them has become.

Children are not possessions-

I tend to LOL at those with young kids who believe that they alone control or can dictate outcomes-

I agree I get frustrated when parents insist their kids will be just like them.

I remember watching an episode of WifeSwap a while back where the father stated that he was deliberately brainwashing his children so they wouldn't deviate from his ideological and religious beliefs. Basically treating them like they're supposed to be little clones of himself. It made my stomach turn. 


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Sisteract
by Whoopie on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:05 PM
4 moms liked this

Teenage and adult children are not for the faint of heart, especially if one tends to be controlling-

We made the world their palette, augmented life with many diverse experiences and then let them fly-


desertlvn
by Silver Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:07 PM
1 mom liked this

My young DD already has different religious beliefs than us (her parents). My DH and I are agnostic-bordering-on-atheists, and my DD fully believes in god. She has her own creation theory about god, and I love it!!

If she were to become closed minded and extreme w/ religious beliefs I would have an extremely tough time with it.

acrogodess
by Silver Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:07 PM

Even at 9 and 11 ds and dd have very distinct personalities and views. It would never bother me that they do not agree with everything I believe in

desertlvn
by Silver Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:19 PM

My DH has relatives who are extemely conservative and religious. They homeschooled their 11 children and have very strong opionions on politics and religion. Their oldest got pregnant at 16. Their 2nd oldest was disowned at 15 because of her beliefs and lifestlye. (She currently doesn't talk to them, is in a bi-sexual relationship, doesn't believe in god, and dabbles around with drugs and alcohol.) Their 3rd oldest has now come out of the closet as being gay to many family members.... but not to the parents yet.

I think the best we can do is give love, stability, and keep an open mind knowing each child is an individual.

lindilouwho82
by on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:24 PM
1 mom liked this

My DD is her own entity and therefore should be respected as I am. I don't want a mini-me, I want a confident, healthy, personable, self-motivated and kind individual; not that I don't possess any of those characteristics just that if she has a healthy foundation of the above, she will lead a life that will make her happy. And thats all I can ask for as a parent; any parent that cannot accept their children may or may not turn out like them should reconsider why they became or want to be parents. 

heidimoose134
by Momma Moose on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:33 PM

I'm also reminded of that girl who was raised in the Westboro Baptist Church and was disowned from her family because she stood up and said that she doesn't belive that God is an angry, vengeful being, but rather a loving, kind and forgiving God. Talk about petty. 

Quoting heidimoose134:


Quoting Sisteract:

They have.

I am proud of who each one of them has become.

Children are not possessions-

I tend to LOL at those with young kids who believe that they alone control or can dictate outcomes-

I agree I get frustrated when parents insist their kids will be just like them.

I remember watching an episode of WifeSwap a while back where the father stated that he was deliberately brainwashing his children so they wouldn't deviate from his ideological and religious beliefs. Basically treating them like they're supposed to be little clones of himself. It made my stomach turn. 



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gsprofval
by Silver Member on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:33 PM
1 mom liked this

I've tried to teach my kids critical thinking skills and to question some things and to do the research before reaching a conclusion.

My youngest really does research and question. We like to talk politics, but have opposing viewpoints. It makes for some interesting conversations and I welcome those.

FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Jun. 30, 2012 at 3:35 PM
1 mom liked this

They have, in ways.

I have no problem admitting that there have been times I have had conflicting concerns, feelings.  But I am indeed proud that they are not robots and use their own minds to determine who and what they are.  Their thoughts, feelings and such are not so far removed from my own that I find myself worried.  

They hold their own on their own.  

I am indeed proud.

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