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If you believe a woman should have her husbands consent before getting an abortion... sfag

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Do you think a woman needs her husbands consent for any other reproductive or pregnancy decision?

How about to get her tubes tied?

What if she wants a natural, no-intervention birth? Do she need his permission?

What if she wants a c-section? Or, flip that. What if he wants her to get a c-section? There are compelling studies showing that c-section is safer for the baby.

Can he forbid an epidural? Or require one?

It's his baby too, right? Doesn't he get the right to say how it is delivered?

by on Oct. 2, 2012 at 6:08 PM
Replies (101-110):
ReginaStar
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:13 AM

I'm sorry but a man having no rights to the decision of abortion has no bearing to a man having the right to leave his child with out financial help. You may excuse the "abortion" with it's not eligible for person hood but you can't excuse a born child from person hood. 

gammie
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:22 AM

This!

Quoting _Kissy_:

We decide everything as a couple but the final decision is/was mine.


https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/156571_429222273803425_1697594787_n.jpg

kailu1835
by Ruby Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:25 AM
1 mom liked this

I wish that delivery rooms were more science based instead of fear based :(

Quoting Sat.Wed:

Sad thing? the hospital I work at doesnt allow VBACs once you have a section thats the ONLY way (some women litterally wait until their waters break before presenting at the hospital) like I said my daughters was a c-section because of where her lesion was and the thin covering it had over it and her hydrocephlous etc... my sons was suppsoe to be get an epidural etc... but I had to have him NO meds cause I dialated to quickly and once they broke my water ds was litterally hot tailin it out lol


Quoting kailu1835:

SB - is that Spina Bifida?

My 3rd baby decided to turn tranverse in the middle of early labor after my water had broken, and they won't manually flip a baby after waters have broken.  I got another 2 hours after the decision was made, just to try and let him flip back, but after another ultrasound showing he was still sideways, I went in for the section.

What frustrates me is when people will jump to sections, even when there is no danger, and then we wonder why our section rate is 1 in 3 women?!  Even repeat sections (which a 1VBAC is just as safe as 0VBAC, but 2 sections and your risk is a lot higher) should be done after a trial of labor, for the safety of the baby.  Ugh.  I go in circles on this topic lol

Quoting Sat.Wed:

Agreed only reason I had c-section with dd is because of her SB had ds natural lol





Quoting kailu1835:

By the way, there are absolutely ZERO credible studies proving cesereans safer for any baby or mother that is not already in danger. Natural childbirth always has been and always will be the safest way to give birth for both mother and baby, provided there are no immediate health concerns for either.





babiesbabybaby development

DSamuels
by Gold Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 12:36 PM
1 mom liked this
Wow, never thought I would ever agree with you, but I do.

Quoting AdellesMom:

I think that if a person is adult enough to lay down and had sex with someone, they should be adult enough to come to a consensus with their SO/DH about reproduction, birth control, abortion, tubal ligation, etc. So, I think that a couple should agree.



I also think that since a woman can get an abortion without a man's consent, a man should be able to sign his rights away without permission of the court or the woman. That'd only be fair IMO.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
AdellesMom
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 12:39 PM
LOL!

I'm full of surprises! ;)


Quoting DSamuels:

Wow, never thought I would ever agree with you, but I do.



Quoting AdellesMom:

I think that if a person is adult enough to lay down and had sex with someone, they should be adult enough to come to a consensus with their SO/DH about reproduction, birth control, abortion, tubal ligation, etc. So, I think that a couple should agree.





I also think that since a woman can get an abortion without a man's consent, a man should be able to sign his rights away without permission of the court or the woman. That'd only be fair IMO.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LittleBirdFly
by Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 12:42 PM

thats what it usually is. So my question to OP are you mad at that? That the woman has to give "permisssion" for a vasectomy but a woman doesn't need her husbands permission to get an abortion/epidural etc?

Quoting DSamuels:

I had to sign paperwork saying I agreed before they would do my husband's vasectomy.


Redwall
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 7:57 PM

Yes, I do.  The baby just isn't the mom's it's the dad's as well.  I think they need to agree on things that are that important.

GoddessNDaRuff
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:41 PM
1 mom liked this

LOL you are a new member so I guess you haven't had the chance to get to know Paganbaby.

BTW not all women get the option of giving consent or signing to agree if their husband gets a vasectomy. My husband could get one tomorrow and I wouldn't know until after the fact (though he won't. I've been trying to talk him into one later and he's not budging ) on the other hand I needed his permission for a freaking IUD and then to get the damn thing taken out even though it was embedded. They would not take it out until he consented. -_- So I guess it depends on the area.

Quoting LittleBirdFly:

thats what it usually is. So my question to OP are you mad at that? That the woman has to give "permisssion" for a vasectomy but a woman doesn't need her husbands permission to get an abortion/epidural etc?

Quoting DSamuels:

I had to sign paperwork saying I agreed before they would do my husband's vasectomy.



brandydesiree
by Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:46 PM
Abortion, Yes.

The rest no.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
GoddessNDaRuff
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 8:50 PM


What if your husband asked you have an abortion?

No one ever wants to answer that question. But from my experience it's usually the men demanding, begging, threatening women to get an abortion not begging her to keep the baby. But apparently men like that don't exist in the world of CafeMom. To me it's funny how a woman is villified for having the baby and the father having to support the child and yet she is villified if she chooses to abort. No one ever wants to address the situations where mom wanted to abort but listened to dad and had the baby and he leaves 6 months to a year later because he doesn't like the responsibility of fatherhood or is done with the mother and doesn't think he should have to take care of the kids because he's not with her. And there are women who can vouch for the fact that Husbands can turn into those types of assholes.

Quoting rfhsure:

 The argument that abortion is so wrong and you're murdering a baby is lost on me when a person says, 'well if it's rape then it's fine.' You're either in or your out. I've known people who have gotten pregnant while on birth control, who have had condoms break and use plan B. So you're saying that because they had sex they have to keep a child they don't want, even when acting responsibly? Women don't "force" men to take care of financial responsibility. In this case the woman is asking about a marriage. In a marriage, financial responsiblity has already been worked out between the couple, so especially in this circumstance, that's a statement that's not really relevant. it's a man's right to father his child - if the child is born. There's many cases where the guy will talk himself up and once the baby pops out he turns out to be a deadbeat. personal choice is personal choice. That's great that you would never get an abortion unless you're raped, but if you were in a situation where you still acted responsibly and were about to have a child you couldn't take care of or didn't want to have you may think differently. Just because you wouldn't have an abortion doesn't mean it's wrong for anyone else to have one. And the circumstances you're describing are very general and not applicable to every, if not most situations. Just as you wouldn't want to be forced into an abortion, many women don't want to be forced into carrying a child. That's the one topic the posts author left out: What if your husband asked you have an abortion? that would be terrible wouldn't it? So why should he have rights to ask any of those other things of a woman?


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