Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

My children are not allowed to be Gay *Edit in red*

Posted by   + Show Post

Or straight for that matter until they're 13.

There's been a lot of negative talk around the house lately about sexual preference . Some neighborhood kids are accusing my 7 year son of being gay. (He likes to chase boys and pretend to kiss them) Then my younger two (7 and 5) have over heard my dd's friends talk about homosexual this and bi that. We've talked and talked but I feel like I'm just spinning in circles.

So I decided to nip it in the bud. I made the announcement last night that all kids are A-sexual, meaning they don't like anyone. And like religion (that's another subject we're going round and round with), you're not allowed to chose what you are until you're a teenager. The kids seemed satisfied and my 13 year old dd took that as an opportunity to announce that she was officially Straight and Christian!

We have some funny dinner table conversations LOL


I never said they weren't allowed to like anyone. I had my first crush at 5 (A neighbor boy) And my next big crush at 8 (My sister's bf Andrea) Did that make me Gay, Straight, or Bi? I didn't know or care. I was a kid.

The issue isn't me not wanting my kids to like other kids, but them feeling forced to identify their sexuality when they aren't ready too. My 5 year old can come home tomorrow and say she likes Suzie. I'll smile and say that's great. It doesn't make her a lesbian though. That is something that she has to decide when she's ready too and 5 isn't it.

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 11:30 AM
Replies (91-100):
p1r4t3cr0pc1rcl
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 12:31 PM

 I have a friend who is gay. She was raised in a Christian family, when she came out, her mother tried to make her go to counseling with the Pastor, and she kept ignoring all of it, and was kind of awful to her. 

She has had the worst time (not as bad as others, of course, at least she still has a home to come home to) with this trasition, and her self esteem has been hurt. 

A lot of the children my son and daughter hang out with are raised traditional christian, so all of that is 'bad' or 'wrong', and my daughter has been told that, and I have had to correct her. 

I had to tell her that her friend was wrong to say that was wrong, it was okay that they do not like it, and do not want to do that, but it is not wrong just because they do not like it. 

At this point, my son has a general idea, but does not really care. 

Quoting paganbaby:

That's a great age to start learning about different types of families :-)

And yes, my biggest fear is my kids hearing all this neg "gay" talk then ending up being gay themselves and having low self esteem because of it :-(


trese210
by Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 6:48 PM

I agree 100%

TranquilMind
by Platinum Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 7:22 PM

Oh my.  7 and 5???? What the heck is going on out there today.  When I was that age, we barely noticed gender.  We were just...kids.  Playing!  That's it.  Softball, kickball, badminton. Nobody cared who your opponent was, nobody talked about boyfriends or girlfriends until well into late middle school.

What the heck is happening in our world today?

Redwall
by Silver Member on Oct. 4, 2012 at 7:51 PM

Oh wow...good luck with that....

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Oct. 15, 2012 at 6:27 PM

That's awful for her :-( I hope that her family was able to get over it and accept her as she is.

And good for you! You need to correct them or else who knows what these poor kids are going to end up thinking :-/

Quoting p1r4t3cr0pc1rcl:

 I have a friend who is gay. She was raised in a Christian family, when she came out, her mother tried to make her go to counseling with the Pastor, and she kept ignoring all of it, and was kind of awful to her. 

She has had the worst time (not as bad as others, of course, at least she still has a home to come home to) with this trasition, and her self esteem has been hurt. 

A lot of the children my son and daughter hang out with are raised traditional christian, so all of that is 'bad' or 'wrong', and my daughter has been told that, and I have had to correct her. 

I had to tell her that her friend was wrong to say that was wrong, it was okay that they do not like it, and do not want to do that, but it is not wrong just because they do not like it. 

At this point, my son has a general idea, but does not really care. 

Quoting paganbaby:

That's a great age to start learning about different types of families :-)

And yes, my biggest fear is my kids hearing all this neg "gay" talk then ending up being gay themselves and having low self esteem because of it :-(



Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Oct. 15, 2012 at 6:27 PM

Same when I was a kid...

Quoting TranquilMind:

Oh my.  7 and 5???? What the heck is going on out there today.  When I was that age, we barely noticed gender.  We were just...kids.  Playing!  That's it.  Softball, kickball, badminton. Nobody cared who your opponent was, nobody talked about boyfriends or girlfriends until well into late middle school.

What the heck is happening in our world today?


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

o0orange0o
by Melani on Oct. 15, 2012 at 6:30 PM



Quoting Lizardannie1966:

Pagan, I think you're adorable and ALWAYS look forward to your posts.

But you might want to rethink this.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
p1r4t3cr0pc1rcl
by on Oct. 15, 2012 at 6:32 PM

They are working through all of it. She went off to college so she does not have to deal with them as much now, and it helps her to get in contact with other members of the community for support. 

I will always correct my children, it sucks because I feel like an ass, but I refuse to let them have a closed mind, I want them to have an open mind in all areas, to know every side of any given, event, situation and choice. Not to make rash judgement or to believe as they are blindly told, because a book said so, or a person said so. 

Quoting paganbaby:

That's awful for her :-( I hope that her family was able to get over it and accept her as she is.

And good for you! You need to correct them or else who knows what these poor kids are going to end up thinking :-/

Quoting p1r4t3cr0pc1rcl:

 I have a friend who is gay. She was raised in a Christian family, when she came out, her mother tried to make her go to counseling with the Pastor, and she kept ignoring all of it, and was kind of awful to her. 

She has had the worst time (not as bad as others, of course, at least she still has a home to come home to) with this trasition, and her self esteem has been hurt. 

A lot of the children my son and daughter hang out with are raised traditional christian, so all of that is 'bad' or 'wrong', and my daughter has been told that, and I have had to correct her. 

I had to tell her that her friend was wrong to say that was wrong, it was okay that they do not like it, and do not want to do that, but it is not wrong just because they do not like it. 

At this point, my son has a general idea, but does not really care. 

Quoting paganbaby:

That's a great age to start learning about different types of families :-)

And yes, my biggest fear is my kids hearing all this neg "gay" talk then ending up being gay themselves and having low self esteem because of it :-(




trebelcleff
by on Oct. 15, 2012 at 6:43 PM

That's perfect!  And for the record, my little one (almost 6) LOVES girls in every way, but anytime he talks about marriage he says he wants to marry one of his close friends, who happens to be a boy.  I figure at least he has the right idea about marrying someone you love and are close to!

GotSomeKids
by Silver Member on Oct. 15, 2012 at 7:11 PM

I think your issue is not whether they are "allowed" to be gay (who is allowed to be one or the other).  Your issue is when they are allowed to date, be affectionate, etc. etc. etc.

BTW, there have been several studies on children knowing what their orientation is between the ages of 3-5.  I think your the one who may not have a choice.  Still think your issue is more about relationships than whether or not they decide to identify being gay, bi or straight.


JMHO

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)