Father protests son being punished for defending himself against bullies
Randy Duke of Victoria, TX is picketing his son Max's school with a sandwich sign. It reads, "Bullying victims are punished here." Max was bullied by kids until he'd had enough. He'd been picked on for three years, and finally fought back.
Administrators say there's no changing their decision to send Max to an alternative school for 30 days. Now Mr. Duke stands vigil outside Cade Middle School on his precious time home from Afghanistan.
Max had made a paper airplane for a special needs child, and the bullies, who he said follow him everywhere, stepped on it. According to the news story, they went at it, and guess who got punished? Now Max can't attend marching band, the only thing that was helping bring him out of his shell, his father said.
Let's send a strong message to Cade Middle School Principal Lisa Blundell. Tell her the rules need to change. Bullies should be punished. Not their victims. Send email to Lisa.Blundell@visd.net.
Sorry I'm not able to copy a link to the story. It's just not working for some reason!
A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Absolutely. Parents are responsible for their own kids. Not someone else's, regardless of how bad their situation might be. And a parent who lets a spouse emotionally or physically abuse a child is just as bad as an administrator who turns a blind eye to a bully.
Quoting kailu1835:
A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:
Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Agreed. I made up my mind a long time ago that if anything happened to my son like what happened to me in 6th grade, and the school didn't do anything, I would make a HUGE MASSIVE stink. This stuff needs to be brought to light.
Quoting MentorMom1:Absolutely. Parents are responsible for their own kids. Not someone else's, regardless of how bad their situation might be. And a parent who lets a spouse emotionally or physically abuse a child is just as bad as an administrator who turns a blind eye to a bully.
Quoting kailu1835:
A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:
Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Quoting kailu1835:A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Victims learn that they don't have to allow someone bigger than them to hit them, that they are strong enough to stand up for themselves. Bullies learn that just because someone is smaller than them doesn't mean that they are defensless, and so they may think twice before punching someone in the face, or shoving them into a locker. You're right, adults need to teach better skills, but adults are not always around to witness what is going on. If a bully knows that the adults allow a victim to fight back, they are going to be less likely to throw a punch.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
You misunderstand my point. It's up to the adults to teach these kids better skills. Both the victims AND bullies. What lesson are these kids learning by having hitting advocated?
Quoting kailu1835:A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Bullying takes all forms. I don't imagine it was easy talking to Hitler about killing Jews: Hey, there Adolf. You're being a little heavy handed, don't you think? And how about the Wall Street vultures that screwed up the economy? They did it because they COULD! And who got punished? The victims, every time. Yes, Hitler had an abusive father. But it wasn't our job to rehabilitate him. It was our job to stop him.
Quoting kailu1835:
Victims learn that they don't have to allow someone bigger than them to hit them, that they are strong enough to stand up for themselves. Bullies learn that just because someone is smaller than them doesn't mean that they are defensless, and so they may think twice before punching someone in the face, or shoving them into a locker. You're right, adults need to teach better skills, but adults are not always around to witness what is going on. If a bully knows that the adults allow a victim to fight back, they are going to be less likely to throw a punch.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
You misunderstand my point. It's up to the adults to teach these kids better skills. Both the victims AND bullies. What lesson are these kids learning by having hitting advocated?
Quoting kailu1835:
A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:
Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
It is ridiculous what happens to victims who stand up to their bullies. My sd was having problems with a girl at school. She had went to the principal for help. My husband, her father, had went and talked to the principal about the girl bullying my sd. A week after the last meeting the girl attacked my sd in front of the school waiting for the bus. My sd hit her back to defend herself. They both received the same suspension and had to go to court for disorderly for fighting. FREAKING RIDICULOUS!
Precisely. Especially the part in red.
Quoting MentorMom1:Bullying takes all forms. I don't imagine it was easy talking to Hitler about killing Jews: Hey, there Adolf. You're being a little heavy handed, don't you think? And how about the Wall Street vultures that screwed up the economy? They did it because they COULD! And who got punished? The victims, every time. Yes, Hitler had an abusive father. But it wasn't our job to rehabilitate him. It was our job to stop him.
Quoting kailu1835:
Victims learn that they don't have to allow someone bigger than them to hit them, that they are strong enough to stand up for themselves. Bullies learn that just because someone is smaller than them doesn't mean that they are defensless, and so they may think twice before punching someone in the face, or shoving them into a locker. You're right, adults need to teach better skills, but adults are not always around to witness what is going on. If a bully knows that the adults allow a victim to fight back, they are going to be less likely to throw a punch.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
You misunderstand my point. It's up to the adults to teach these kids better skills. Both the victims AND bullies. What lesson are these kids learning by having hitting advocated?
Quoting kailu1835:
A victim's responsibility is to their own safety, not to teach their bullies coping mechanisms. This sort of thinking is what is so wrong with our country. Do you think that rape victims, or domestic abuse victims should not fight back, and instead try to hug their rapist or abuser and tell them "I'm here for you, how can I help?" Somehow, I doubt it. Victims have every right to fight back if they are being physically harmed, and no child of mine will EVER be punished for protecting themselves, or putting themselves between a bully and their victim.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
I could not advocate that. Bullies often come from a home of violence. Bullying others is a coping mechanism. It stops when they are given better coping skills.
Quoting kailu1835:
Actually, it tends to stop the bullying. Bullies pick on kids who won't stand up for themselves. They're too weak to pick on the kids who are willing to put up a fight. Sometimes hitting solves everything.
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Quoting thecoffeefairy:
Hitting solves nothing.
Quoting ButterMeUp:
I don't understand why he shOuld be punished? Bullies who run their mouths, deserve to get punched in that same mouth.
It's anti bullying month. They pull this shit???? Wow
Does the Polygamous Community Deserve Food Stamps?
- MentorMom1
on Oct. 9, 2012 at 7:18 PM