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This is what happens when you equate porn with perversion

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Long story short, a 17yo girl was caught looking at porn, which is totally normal, and her parents freaked and assumed she was a defective perv, so she made up a story to explain her perversion and said she was molested by a neighbor kid when she was little, and the innocent guy spent years in prison for child molestation.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/22/johnathan-montgomery_n_2175208.html

by on Nov. 22, 2012 at 10:46 AM
Replies (11-20):
rfhsure
by Bronze Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 1:26 PM
1 mom liked this

 yeah, her parents aren't the smartest, but that girl I mean cmon. that's messed up that she would do that. I think that it's normal to look at porn, sure, but it doesnt make porn a normal depiction of sex, expecially not to someone who doesn't fully understand sex yet. I knew someone who lived in a tiny trailer with his mom growing up and had to see them do it all the time. he was exposed to pornography when he was very young (don't ask me wh or for all the details, this is the simple version) and uiltimately ended molesting his cousin at 11 years old and had to go to counseling for years following. He has turned out to be an okay guy, he's really nice and he certainly doesn't do anything like he did then. but he also has serious intimacy and bonding issues and has a couple things he's into sexually that a lot of people might get uncomfortable with. Is it solely because he was exposed to porn? No, his home life growing up wasn't great. But there's no doubt in my mind that his early exposure to sex and pornography played a big role in his skewed understanding of what is acceptable sexually. A 17 year old girl I'm sure can handle herself a little better than a 5 year old, but bottom line is if you haven't been educated about sex, and you don't have a clear understanding of what's normal in sex and what isn't, then porn can actually be very destructive to your sexual development. Porn degrades women atrociously, it teaches unsafe sex practices, it makes things like much older man having sex with 'underage' girls look sexy and fun, it glorifies the idea that women should be in total servitude to men in a sexual situation and that it's about the man's pleasure. just not a good thing for someone really young to exposed to. if it's your cup of tea, sip it, that's not my problem. But imagine if this girl were a virgin, and her parents, who sound rather protective in the topic of sexuality, haven't given her the rundown yet. Pornography might be a lot more damaging than you'd think.

LauraKW
by "Dude!" on Nov. 22, 2012 at 2:26 PM
2 moms liked this
Why do you say porn makes women appear subservient to men? I think that is an antiquated notion and part of the reason porn is still viewed as something decadent and perverted. Women in porn are empowered and comfortable with their sexuality. Not to mention they make at least twice as much as men in porn.

Quoting rfhsure:

 yeah, her parents aren't the smartest, but that girl I mean cmon. that's messed up that she would do that. I think that it's normal to look at porn, sure, but it doesnt make porn a normal depiction of sex, expecially not to someone who doesn't fully understand sex yet. I knew someone who lived in a tiny trailer with his mom growing up and had to see them do it all the time. he was exposed to pornography when he was very young (don't ask me wh or for all the details, this is the simple version) and uiltimately ended molesting his cousin at 11 years old and had to go to counseling for years following. He has turned out to be an okay guy, he's really nice and he certainly doesn't do anything like he did then. but he also has serious intimacy and bonding issues and has a couple things he's into sexually that a lot of people might get uncomfortable with. Is it solely because he was exposed to porn? No, his home life growing up wasn't great. But there's no doubt in my mind that his early exposure to sex and pornography played a big role in his skewed understanding of what is acceptable sexually. A 17 year old girl I'm sure can handle herself a little better than a 5 year old, but bottom line is if you haven't been educated about sex, and you don't have a clear understanding of what's normal in sex and what isn't, then porn can actually be very destructive to your sexual development. Porn degrades women atrociously, it teaches unsafe sex practices, it makes things like much older man having sex with 'underage' girls look sexy and fun, it glorifies the idea that women should be in total servitude to men in a sexual situation and that it's about the man's pleasure. just not a good thing for someone really young to exposed to. if it's your cup of tea, sip it, that's not my problem. But imagine if this girl were a virgin, and her parents, who sound rather protective in the topic of sexuality, haven't given her the rundown yet. Pornography might be a lot more damaging than you'd think.

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FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Nov. 22, 2012 at 2:35 PM

Why all the blame on the parents?


olivejuice2
by Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 3:27 PM
This is why sex and sexuality shouldn't be taboo to discuss. It is normal and healthy for young people to be curious about sex, they shouldn't be made to feel ashamed. Perhaps if the parents had encouraged her to ask questions and have a dialogue with them about sex, she wouldn't have felt the urge to get that info from porn. Maybe she had other reasons for looking at porn other than info seeking, but that doesn't change the fact that her parents should have encouraged conversation.

It was very wrong for the girl to lie and my heart goes out to the neighbor boy and his family. I think the girls parents, however, badly failed her.
mikiemom
by Ruby Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 5:18 PM

wow that totally sucks - some people are way too uptight.

mcr17
by on Nov. 22, 2012 at 5:27 PM
2 moms liked this
Porn is harmless. Porn with consenting adults in it anyways

Quoting AlekD:

I agree that what they did was obviously wrong but disagree that porn is totally normal. Perhaps "normal" as defined as "everyone does it" but not normal as defined as healthy and harmless.
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AlekD
by Gold Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 5:47 PM
That is demonstrably false, sorry. For information I suggest the TEDTalk called "the demise of guys" that will point you in the direction of more information if you are interested in the actual science behind why porn is harmful to individuals and society.

Quoting mcr17:

Porn is harmless. Porn with consenting adults in it anyways



Quoting AlekD:

I agree that what they did was obviously wrong but disagree that porn is totally normal. Perhaps "normal" as defined as "everyone does it" but not normal as defined as healthy and harmless.
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Momniscient
by Ruby Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 5:52 PM
1 mom liked this
That's an awful story.
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Angie_O
by Member on Nov. 22, 2012 at 6:02 PM

wow...

mcr17
by on Nov. 22, 2012 at 7:48 PM
1 mom liked this
So watching people having sex is harmful? Right.....

Quoting AlekD:

That is demonstrably false, sorry. For information I suggest the TEDTalk called "the demise of guys" that will point you in the direction of more information if you are interested in the actual science behind why porn is harmful to individuals and society.



Quoting mcr17:

Porn is harmless. Porn with consenting adults in it anyways





Quoting AlekD:

I agree that what they did was obviously wrong but disagree that porn is totally normal. Perhaps "normal" as defined as "everyone does it" but not normal as defined as healthy and harmless.
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