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Why does everyone question my sons name?? Edit

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I don't mind that it's questioned, so much as when people won't let it go. I used to explain that Bubba was a nickname but then I would be pestered by people wanting to know his real name and God forbid they find out, they'll call him it. Which drives him up the wall. So I finally just stopped explaining and started saying, Yes this is his real name.

Yesterday at 7-11 they guy behind the counter asked what my son's name was. (we're regulars) I told him Bubba. He paused for a sec and said, "Really?" "Is that his real name?" I looked him dead in the eye and said "Yes it is."

That is the name my son chose. If he wants people to know what his given name is, he'll tell them.

Now I know it's an unusual name. But so is my daughter's Audi. Yet no one goes around demanding to know her real name. So what gives?

by on Jan. 2, 2013 at 8:28 PM
Replies (241-250):
i.m.r.
by Bronze Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 2:52 PM
1 mom liked this
Wow the replies to this are pretty hostile. Personally I don't care what you name your child and I respect that you're allowing him to express himself by choosing to be called by something else. I don't see a problem with it. I think by going against the social norms and allowing your children the freedom to create their own identities (even down to what they like to be called) it scares people and makes them angry. Why?I have no clue. I would just tell people he goes by bubba and leave it at that. It's none of their business why, and it validates your son's sense of self by supporting him. This won't be a popular reply, but meh. If you were talking about physically abusing your son I'd have some stronger words, but allowing him to choose his name is not abuse, just a different form of parenting. Not a big deal IMO.
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XandersMomma07
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 2:53 PM

I wasn't saying anything about calling him Bubba that is your choice and his choice until you and your son decide differently.  My son would prefer to be called the weasel but he started school (pre k) this year and I didn't think that would go well because he is supposed to learn his name address and all that. I can just imagine him getting lost in a store and someone trying to help him and across the loudspeaker they say can the parents of the weasel please come to the courtesy desk. At least Bubba wouldn't be bad for that lol.

Quoting paganbaby:

If he wants to use his real name later that's great. In the mean time I'll continue calling him Bubba.

And totally respect your son wanting to be called Xander. My son's the exact opposite though. He'll tell you, don't call me Kaleb, call be Bubba,lol.

Quoting XandersMomma07:

Instead of saying it his real name tell people that he goes by Bubba. As he gets older he will want to use his real name. It is great that you let him have a say in what he wants to be known as but in some cases you have to be careful. For example I have a little stuffed weasel I have had since I was little whenmy son was 2 he asked what it was, I told him and he started saying I'm the weasel, our electric went out one night and he all of a sudden yells out I'm the weasel inthe dark (I couldn't help but laugh) He is 5 now and if it was up to him he would still be the Weasel so its his nickname but if someone calls him that besides family he will tell them NO my name is Xander.



paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Jan. 3, 2013 at 2:53 PM
1 mom liked this

happy

Quoting i.m.r.:

Wow the replies to this are pretty hostile. Personally I don't care what you name your child and I respect that you're allowing him to express himself by choosing to be called by something else. I don't see a problem with it. I think by going against the social norms and allowing your children the freedom to create their own identities (even down to what they like to be called) it scares people and makes them angry. Why?I have no clue. I would just tell people he goes by bubba and leave it at that. It's none of their business why, and it validates your son's sense of self by supporting him. This won't be a popular reply, but meh. If you were talking about physically abusing your son I'd have some stronger words, but allowing him to choose his name is not abuse, just a different form of parenting. Not a big deal IMO.


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jlo1313
by Silver Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 2:59 PM

 I hate stereotypes as much as anyone else in here, but unless he strives to be a tow truck driver or the local garbage man, jobs aren't going to pour his way if he has Bubba Smith headlining his resume. 

Quoting paganbaby:

So I should let him know now, that in 10 years he will no longer be allowed to go by Bubba but his given name instead.

Hmmm...I don't know. I kinda think that by the time he's 18 he'll have made up his own mind about what name he wants to be known by.

Quoting jlo1313:

Honestly I see nothing wrong with his given name and he is being oversensitive about it and you are allowing him to be.  I think you really need to sit down and explain that Bubba is fine for a period of time...but then we have to grow up, get jobs, apply for college and go by our given name, and then say "you can call me ____ after he develops companions in a professional environment. 

People called my boyfriend Bubba because of a funny story involving his nephew who couldn't say his name (which happens to be the same as your son's only spelled biblically), he couldn't say his L's and insisted his name was Bubba and it stuck with his family until he met me, and my son was Bubba because he was a little fatty and Bubby is a nickname for brother.  Today both go by their given names...only add "ator" at the end when we are at home or joking around.  *ator as in "gladiator"*


 


paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Jan. 3, 2013 at 2:59 PM

I'm sorry, you're right. I was just being a tad defensive.

Idk, I think it would be cute to hear weasel over the intercom LOL

Quoting XandersMomma07:

I wasn't saying anything about calling him Bubba that is your choice and his choice until you and your son decide differently.  My son would prefer to be called the weasel but he started school (pre k) this year and I didn't think that would go well because he is supposed to learn his name address and all that. I can just imagine him getting lost in a store and someone trying to help him and across the loudspeaker they say can the parents of the weasel please come to the courtesy desk. At least Bubba wouldn't be bad for that lol.

Quoting paganbaby:

If he wants to use his real name later that's great. In the mean time I'll continue calling him Bubba.

And totally respect your son wanting to be called Xander. My son's the exact opposite though. He'll tell you, don't call me Kaleb, call be Bubba,lol.

Quoting XandersMomma07:

Instead of saying it his real name tell people that he goes by Bubba. As he gets older he will want to use his real name. It is great that you let him have a say in what he wants to be known as but in some cases you have to be careful. For example I have a little stuffed weasel I have had since I was little whenmy son was 2 he asked what it was, I told him and he started saying I'm the weasel, our electric went out one night and he all of a sudden yells out I'm the weasel inthe dark (I couldn't help but laugh) He is 5 now and if it was up to him he would still be the Weasel so its his nickname but if someone calls him that besides family he will tell them NO my name is Xander.




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mamabear0791
by Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this

Idk about others, but I am very interested in names and the stories behind them. A person in our town named her twins Bub and Sis (yes, on their birth certificate) and I thought it was so cool! When they went to school, tho the school system tried to get them to change their names because, in their words, naming a child something like that was bordering on child abuse (I still wonder how can that be child abuse.)

laineylarue
by Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this

My brother's nickname is Bubba & he has always gone by it, yet he had a good run in the navy,  he is a city firefighter & is finishing up his pre-reqs for nursing school.   I don't think in his 27 yrs it has done him any harm.  

Quoting talia-mom:

Do you have a professional job? If not, you have no clue what you are doing to him. Allowing him to live his life as Bubba is going to hurt him.


Quoting paganbaby:

That's why he has a professional name to fall back on if he choses to use it. I myself go by my nickname and have ever since I was a baby. My mom gave me a "grown up" name as well but I haven't had the desire to use it.

Quoting talia-mom:

If he insists on Bubba, be prepared for people to think he and your family is certain way.   Many are going to look down on you.   You may not care, but when he is applying for scholarships, Bubba vs Jonathan is going to put him at a disadvantage. 




paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:03 PM

*Shrugs* I always put my given name on aplications but introduced myself with my nickname. And after I'm hired my nickname goes on the name tag. I'm sure he can do the same thing.

Quoting jlo1313:

 I hate stereotypes as much as anyone else in here, but unless he strives to be a tow truck driver or the local garbage man, jobs aren't going to pour his way if he has Bubba Smith headlining his resume. 

Quoting paganbaby:

So I should let him know now, that in 10 years he will no longer be allowed to go by Bubba but his given name instead.

Hmmm...I don't know. I kinda think that by the time he's 18 he'll have made up his own mind about what name he wants to be known by.

Quoting jlo1313:

Honestly I see nothing wrong with his given name and he is being oversensitive about it and you are allowing him to be.  I think you really need to sit down and explain that Bubba is fine for a period of time...but then we have to grow up, get jobs, apply for college and go by our given name, and then say "you can call me ____ after he develops companions in a professional environment. 

People called my boyfriend Bubba because of a funny story involving his nephew who couldn't say his name (which happens to be the same as your son's only spelled biblically), he couldn't say his L's and insisted his name was Bubba and it stuck with his family until he met me, and my son was Bubba because he was a little fatty and Bubby is a nickname for brother.  Today both go by their given names...only add "ator" at the end when we are at home or joking around.  *ator as in "gladiator"*


 


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momto3B
by Bronze Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:04 PM

Then how about just saying that he chose it himself and he likes it. That is pretty cute. 

Quoting paganbaby:

I didn't chose it. He did.

Quoting momto3B:

Unfortuantely, you chose a name that althought attached to many positive, lesser known public figures, has been more clearly defined by the film industry as having negative connotations. 



paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Jan. 3, 2013 at 3:04 PM
1 mom liked this

Love this! :-)

Quoting laineylarue:

My brother's nickname is Bubba & he has always gone by it, yet he had a good run in the navy,  he is a city firefighter & is finishing up his pre-reqs for nursing school.   I don't think in his 27 yrs it has done him any harm.  

Quoting talia-mom:

Do you have a professional job? If not, you have no clue what you are doing to him. Allowing him to live his life as Bubba is going to hurt him.


Quoting paganbaby:

That's why he has a professional name to fall back on if he choses to use it. I myself go by my nickname and have ever since I was a baby. My mom gave me a "grown up" name as well but I haven't had the desire to use it.

Quoting talia-mom:

If he insists on Bubba, be prepared for people to think he and your family is certain way.   Many are going to look down on you.   You may not care, but when he is applying for scholarships, Bubba vs Jonathan is going to put him at a disadvantage. 





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