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Why is it we only ever hear about the objectification of women when men are put on display in similar ways?


Are men more comfortable with being objects of attraction and why is it so bad for a woman to be? 

by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 10:25 AM
Replies (111-120):
Ms.KitKat
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:32 PM

 To each her own.

Nice touch with the disabled question though. 

 

Quoting EireLass:

hahaha. NO, I draw the line at gum! haha. (really I do, I hate it)

The one with flip-flops drove a motorcycle too. I suppose that's wrong?

One of my attorney's rides a Harley. He does have a tat, I've seen it.

One of my doctors always has her dog in the room. Has a tat.

My newest doctor met me for the first time wearing jeans and rubber toe sneakers (Con's).

My own kid is a 6-figure professional, wears flip-flops most days, has the start of a sleeve (ick). She's known world-wide for her skill, and nobody blinks an eye at it.

Watching any of these people in action, I can tell they have alot of self-respect, and alot of confidance. And that 'aura'? Well...I like the aura of REAL. When someone has to 'put on'...they are typically not naturally fitted for their job. Their skill should over-ride everything you see. I'm guessing you would never hire anyone handicapped either.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 gesh- I was giving an example. Actually, none of the attorneys I know have tattoos ( and I know very many both professionally and personally)- again- just giving an example. You must be very relaxed and laid back then. As are your judges in your area. I can tell you, no self-respecting attorney would dare show up in court "dressed like a cowboy" in any Court I have ever been in. And they dare, they would be thrown out.

In regards to a doctor of mine wearing flip-flops? That would never happen! I could not imagine the sound of the flip flop flip flop as the walk down the hall visiting patients. Let me guess, your doctors smacks and cracks his/her gum too.

Call me old-fashioned but- I do believe professionals should present an aura of...... well............- PROFESSIONALISM and with that goes dress.

Quoting EireLass:

Actually I check qualifications. I'm in a lawsuit right now, in which the female attorney does not wear makeup, and the male attorney dresses like a cowboy...jeans, etc. We are not in the west.If the attorneys dress as you say they do, how do you know if they have tats up and down the arms? I don't see how that determines professionalism, talent, or income (no, I don't have tats up and down my arms).One of my doctors wears jeans, and one of them wears flip-flops. Again....I check qualifications.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 Rather than my answer you, let me ask you a question: would you hire an attorney to represent you in a personal matter and spend thousands of dollars on said attorney for the attorney to be filled with tattoos up and down his/her arms, wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt and flip-flops or at the very least, (if a woman) she wore no makeup and looked old and worn with pasty skin? I think not. I know I certainly would not! and he/she also would be thrown out of the courtroom!

Quoting EireLass:

This is interesting. Your statement of "I did not make the rules", makes me think that this is a rule in your workplace....that women must wear makeup. Do you feel that attorney's who don't wear makeup are unprofessional?

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 No- not at all. I am professional at all times. However, in my line of work, I can not wear jeans and a t-shirt (my usual attire) when seeing clients. My clients are looking at me and expect a certain persona. It would be one thing if I pumped gas or tended bar. But I deal with other professionals, lawyers, etc...... as well as clients seeking my professional service. It's simply a persona that has to be presented. I did not make the rules. For example, at one point, I used to work at a courthouse. There was one judge in particluar who threw out of his court room attorneys whose shoes were not properly polished. This judge had an expectation of certain decorum.

Quoting EireLass:

Do you feel 'unprofessional' without makeup? Do you think people think differently of you with/without makeup?

Quoting Ms.KitKat: 
Quoting EireLass:

I was thinking today about this conversation while in the car. Why do we wear makeup? Be honest. Being honest: I wear makeup only when I am at work and I meeting with a client. In this way, I feel that I present a more professional tone. I also wear my "nice" clothes. It's a package I am trying to present to clients that I am professional. Otherwise, I do not wear makeup- only moisturizer-even to work.


 

LindaClement
by Thatwoman on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:36 PM
1 mom liked this

Who cares if they are comfortable or not?

rolling on floor

EireLass
by Ruby Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:43 PM

So you're not conversing seriously then? Because of your comments on appearance and dress, that tells me you would not hire a handicapped person.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 To each her own.

Nice touch with the disabled question though. 

Quoting EireLass:

hahaha. NO, I draw the line at gum! haha. (really I do, I hate it) The one with flip-flops drove a motorcycle too. I suppose that's wrong? One of my attorney's rides a Harley. He does have a tat, I've seen it. One of my doctors always has her dog in the room. Has a tat. My newest doctor met me for the first time wearing jeans and rubber toe sneakers (Con's). My own kid is a 6-figure professional, wears flip-flops most days, has the start of a sleeve (ick). She's known world-wide for her skill, and nobody blinks an eye at it. Watching any of these people in action, I can tell they have alot of self-respect, and alot of confidance. And that 'aura'? Well...I like the aura of REAL. When someone has to 'put on'...they are typically not naturally fitted for their job. Their skill should over-ride everything you see. I'm guessing you would never hire anyone handicapped either.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 gesh- I was giving an example. Actually, none of the attorneys I know have tattoos ( and I know very many both professionally and personally)- again- just giving an example. You must be very relaxed and laid back then. As are your judges in your area. I can tell you, no self-respecting attorney would dare show up in court "dressed like a cowboy" in any Court I have ever been in. And they dare, they would be thrown out. In regards to a doctor of mine wearing flip-flops? That would never happen! I could not imagine the sound of the flip flop flip flop as the walk down the hall visiting patients. Let me guess, your doctors smacks and cracks his/her gum too. Call me old-fashioned but- I do believe professionals should present an aura of...... well............- PROFESSIONALISM and with that goes dress.

Quoting EireLass:

Actually I check qualifications. I'm in a lawsuit right now, in which the female attorney does not wear makeup, and the male attorney dresses like a cowboy...jeans, etc. We are not in the west.If the attorneys dress as you say they do, how do you know if they have tats up and down the arms? I don't see how that determines professionalism, talent, or income (no, I don't have tats up and down my arms).One of my doctors wears jeans, and one of them wears flip-flops. Again....I check qualifications.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 Rather than my answer you, let me ask you a question: would you hire an attorney to represent you in a personal matter and spend thousands of dollars on said attorney for the attorney to be filled with tattoos up and down his/her arms, wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt and flip-flops or at the very least, (if a woman) she wore no makeup and looked old and worn with pasty skin? I think not. I know I certainly would not! and he/she also would be thrown out of the courtroom!

Quoting EireLass:

This is interesting. Your statement of "I did not make the rules", makes me think that this is a rule in your workplace....that women must wear makeup. Do you feel that attorney's who don't wear makeup are unprofessional?

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 No- not at all. I am professional at all times. However, in my line of work, I can not wear jeans and a t-shirt (my usual attire) when seeing clients. My clients are looking at me and expect a certain persona. It would be one thing if I pumped gas or tended bar. But I deal with other professionals, lawyers, etc...... as well as clients seeking my professional service. It's simply a persona that has to be presented. I did not make the rules. For example, at one point, I used to work at a courthouse. There was one judge in particluar who threw out of his court room attorneys whose shoes were not properly polished. This judge had an expectation of certain decorum.

Quoting EireLass:

Do you feel 'unprofessional' without makeup? Do you think people think differently of you with/without makeup?

Quoting Ms.KitKat: 
Quoting EireLass:

I was thinking today about this conversation while in the car. Why do we wear makeup? Be honest. Being honest: I wear makeup only when I am at work and I meeting with a client. In this way, I feel that I present a more professional tone. I also wear my "nice" clothes. It's a package I am trying to present to clients that I am professional. Otherwise, I do not wear makeup- only moisturizer-even to work.


 


Ms.KitKat
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 3:52 PM

 I am "conversing" quite seriously. However, I am choosing to end this conversation as I feel you on the other hand, are not, "conversing seriously" that is.

Your question regarding the disabled individual, IMHO was disgusting that you chose to even take this conversation to that level. Think and assume of me what you wish. There is nothing I can do about that. That is your burden. Interesting though how you have managed to make such negative assumptions about me and you have never even seen me or know very much about me.

Good day, EireLass. 

Quoting EireLass:

So you're not conversing seriously then? Because of your comments on appearance and dress, that tells me you would not hire a handicapped person.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 To each her own.

Nice touch with the disabled question though. 

Quoting EireLass:

hahaha. NO, I draw the line at gum! haha. (really I do, I hate it) The one with flip-flops drove a motorcycle too. I suppose that's wrong? One of my attorney's rides a Harley. He does have a tat, I've seen it. One of my doctors always has her dog in the room. Has a tat. My newest doctor met me for the first time wearing jeans and rubber toe sneakers (Con's). My own kid is a 6-figure professional, wears flip-flops most days, has the start of a sleeve (ick). She's known world-wide for her skill, and nobody blinks an eye at it. Watching any of these people in action, I can tell they have alot of self-respect, and alot of confidance. And that 'aura'? Well...I like the aura of REAL. When someone has to 'put on'...they are typically not naturally fitted for their job. Their skill should over-ride everything you see. I'm guessing you would never hire anyone handicapped either.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 gesh- I was giving an example. Actually, none of the attorneys I know have tattoos ( and I know very many both professionally and personally)- again- just giving an example. You must be very relaxed and laid back then. As are your judges in your area. I can tell you, no self-respecting attorney would dare show up in court "dressed like a cowboy" in any Court I have ever been in. And they dare, they would be thrown out. In regards to a doctor of mine wearing flip-flops? That would never happen! I could not imagine the sound of the flip flop flip flop as the walk down the hall visiting patients. Let me guess, your doctors smacks and cracks his/her gum too. Call me old-fashioned but- I do believe professionals should present an aura of...... well............- PROFESSIONALISM and with that goes dress.

Quoting EireLass:

Actually I check qualifications. I'm in a lawsuit right now, in which the female attorney does not wear makeup, and the male attorney dresses like a cowboy...jeans, etc. We are not in the west.If the attorneys dress as you say they do, how do you know if they have tats up and down the arms? I don't see how that determines professionalism, talent, or income (no, I don't have tats up and down my arms).One of my doctors wears jeans, and one of them wears flip-flops. Again....I check qualifications.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 Rather than my answer you, let me ask you a question: would you hire an attorney to represent you in a personal matter and spend thousands of dollars on said attorney for the attorney to be filled with tattoos up and down his/her arms, wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt and flip-flops or at the very least, (if a woman) she wore no makeup and looked old and worn with pasty skin? I think not. I know I certainly would not! and he/she also would be thrown out of the courtroom!

Quoting EireLass:

This is interesting. Your statement of "I did not make the rules", makes me think that this is a rule in your workplace....that women must wear makeup. Do you feel that attorney's who don't wear makeup are unprofessional?

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 No- not at all. I am professional at all times. However, in my line of work, I can not wear jeans and a t-shirt (my usual attire) when seeing clients. My clients are looking at me and expect a certain persona. It would be one thing if I pumped gas or tended bar. But I deal with other professionals, lawyers, etc...... as well as clients seeking my professional service. It's simply a persona that has to be presented. I did not make the rules. For example, at one point, I used to work at a courthouse. There was one judge in particluar who threw out of his court room attorneys whose shoes were not properly polished. This judge had an expectation of certain decorum.

Quoting EireLass:

Do you feel 'unprofessional' without makeup? Do you think people think differently of you with/without makeup?

Quoting Ms.KitKat: 
Quoting EireLass:

I was thinking today about this conversation while in the car. Why do we wear makeup? Be honest. Being honest: I wear makeup only when I am at work and I meeting with a client. In this way, I feel that I present a more professional tone. I also wear my "nice" clothes. It's a package I am trying to present to clients that I am professional. Otherwise, I do not wear makeup- only moisturizer-even to work.


 


 

EireLass
by Ruby Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:01 PM

Of course I haven't seen you. It's the internet. But I can read what you write.

Why is it disgusting to question, regarding a disabled individual? I'M disabled. I would not be able to dress to your specifications. So regardless of what you were hiring for, I would not be in the running due to my dress. YOU are actually the one that is disgusting. Believing that clothing is what makes a person professional, knowledgable, worthy of your time.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 I am "conversing" quite seriously. However, I am choosing to end this conversation as I feel you on the other hand, are not, "conversing seriously" that is.

Your question regarding the disabled individual, IMHO was disgusting that you chose to even take this conversation to that level. Think and assume of me what you wish. There is nothing I can do about that. That is your burden. Interesting though how you have managed to make such negative assumptions about me and you have never even seen me or know very much about me.

Good day, EireLass. 

Quoting EireLass:

So you're not conversing seriously then? Because of your comments on appearance and dress, that tells me you would not hire a handicapped person.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 To each her own.

Nice touch with the disabled question though. 

Quoting EireLass:

hahaha. NO, I draw the line at gum! haha. (really I do, I hate it) The one with flip-flops drove a motorcycle too. I suppose that's wrong? One of my attorney's rides a Harley. He does have a tat, I've seen it. One of my doctors always has her dog in the room. Has a tat. My newest doctor met me for the first time wearing jeans and rubber toe sneakers (Con's). My own kid is a 6-figure professional, wears flip-flops most days, has the start of a sleeve (ick). She's known world-wide for her skill, and nobody blinks an eye at it. Watching any of these people in action, I can tell they have alot of self-respect, and alot of confidance. And that 'aura'? Well...I like the aura of REAL. When someone has to 'put on'...they are typically not naturally fitted for their job. Their skill should over-ride everything you see. I'm guessing you would never hire anyone handicapped either.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 gesh- I was giving an example. Actually, none of the attorneys I know have tattoos ( and I know very many both professionally and personally)- again- just giving an example. You must be very relaxed and laid back then. As are your judges in your area. I can tell you, no self-respecting attorney would dare show up in court "dressed like a cowboy" in any Court I have ever been in. And they dare, they would be thrown out. In regards to a doctor of mine wearing flip-flops? That would never happen! I could not imagine the sound of the flip flop flip flop as the walk down the hall visiting patients. Let me guess, your doctors smacks and cracks his/her gum too. Call me old-fashioned but- I do believe professionals should present an aura of...... well............- PROFESSIONALISM and with that goes dress.

Quoting EireLass:

Actually I check qualifications. I'm in a lawsuit right now, in which the female attorney does not wear makeup, and the male attorney dresses like a cowboy...jeans, etc. We are not in the west.If the attorneys dress as you say they do, how do you know if they have tats up and down the arms? I don't see how that determines professionalism, talent, or income (no, I don't have tats up and down my arms).One of my doctors wears jeans, and one of them wears flip-flops. Again....I check qualifications.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 Rather than my answer you, let me ask you a question: would you hire an attorney to represent you in a personal matter and spend thousands of dollars on said attorney for the attorney to be filled with tattoos up and down his/her arms, wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt and flip-flops or at the very least, (if a woman) she wore no makeup and looked old and worn with pasty skin? I think not. I know I certainly would not! and he/she also would be thrown out of the courtroom!

Quoting EireLass:

This is interesting. Your statement of "I did not make the rules", makes me think that this is a rule in your workplace....that women must wear makeup. Do you feel that attorney's who don't wear makeup are unprofessional?

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 No- not at all. I am professional at all times. However, in my line of work, I can not wear jeans and a t-shirt (my usual attire) when seeing clients. My clients are looking at me and expect a certain persona. It would be one thing if I pumped gas or tended bar. But I deal with other professionals, lawyers, etc...... as well as clients seeking my professional service. It's simply a persona that has to be presented. I did not make the rules. For example, at one point, I used to work at a courthouse. There was one judge in particluar who threw out of his court room attorneys whose shoes were not properly polished. This judge had an expectation of certain decorum.

Quoting EireLass:

Do you feel 'unprofessional' without makeup? Do you think people think differently of you with/without makeup?

Quoting Ms.KitKat: 
Quoting EireLass:

I was thinking today about this conversation while in the car. Why do we wear makeup? Be honest. Being honest: I wear makeup only when I am at work and I meeting with a client. In this way, I feel that I present a more professional tone. I also wear my "nice" clothes. It's a package I am trying to present to clients that I am professional. Otherwise, I do not wear makeup- only moisturizer-even to work.


 


 


Ms.KitKat
by Platinum Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:41 PM

 sadly- you have warped this discussion into some strange and weird pretense to suit your own personal agenda for which I do not care to even ponder or fathom.

Good day to you.

Quoting EireLass:

Of course I haven't seen you. It's the internet. But I can read what you write.

Why is it disgusting to question, regarding a disabled individual? I'M disabled. I would not be able to dress to your specifications. So regardless of what you were hiring for, I would not be in the running due to my dress. YOU are actually the one that is disgusting. Believing that clothing is what makes a person professional, knowledgable, worthy of your time.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 I am "conversing" quite seriously. However, I am choosing to end this conversation as I feel you on the other hand, are not, "conversing seriously" that is.

Your question regarding the disabled individual, IMHO was disgusting that you chose to even take this conversation to that level. Think and assume of me what you wish. There is nothing I can do about that. That is your burden. Interesting though how you have managed to make such negative assumptions about me and you have never even seen me or know very much about me.

Good day, EireLass. 

Quoting EireLass:

So you're not conversing seriously then? Because of your comments on appearance and dress, that tells me you would not hire a handicapped person.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 To each her own.

Nice touch with the disabled question though. 

Quoting EireLass:

hahaha. NO, I draw the line at gum! haha. (really I do, I hate it) The one with flip-flops drove a motorcycle too. I suppose that's wrong? One of my attorney's rides a Harley. He does have a tat, I've seen it. One of my doctors always has her dog in the room. Has a tat. My newest doctor met me for the first time wearing jeans and rubber toe sneakers (Con's). My own kid is a 6-figure professional, wears flip-flops most days, has the start of a sleeve (ick). She's known world-wide for her skill, and nobody blinks an eye at it. Watching any of these people in action, I can tell they have alot of self-respect, and alot of confidance. And that 'aura'? Well...I like the aura of REAL. When someone has to 'put on'...they are typically not naturally fitted for their job. Their skill should over-ride everything you see. I'm guessing you would never hire anyone handicapped either.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 gesh- I was giving an example. Actually, none of the attorneys I know have tattoos ( and I know very many both professionally and personally)- again- just giving an example. You must be very relaxed and laid back then. As are your judges in your area. I can tell you, no self-respecting attorney would dare show up in court "dressed like a cowboy" in any Court I have ever been in. And they dare, they would be thrown out. In regards to a doctor of mine wearing flip-flops? That would never happen! I could not imagine the sound of the flip flop flip flop as the walk down the hall visiting patients. Let me guess, your doctors smacks and cracks his/her gum too. Call me old-fashioned but- I do believe professionals should present an aura of...... well............- PROFESSIONALISM and with that goes dress.

Quoting EireLass:

Actually I check qualifications. I'm in a lawsuit right now, in which the female attorney does not wear makeup, and the male attorney dresses like a cowboy...jeans, etc. We are not in the west.If the attorneys dress as you say they do, how do you know if they have tats up and down the arms? I don't see how that determines professionalism, talent, or income (no, I don't have tats up and down my arms).One of my doctors wears jeans, and one of them wears flip-flops. Again....I check qualifications.

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 Rather than my answer you, let me ask you a question: would you hire an attorney to represent you in a personal matter and spend thousands of dollars on said attorney for the attorney to be filled with tattoos up and down his/her arms, wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt and flip-flops or at the very least, (if a woman) she wore no makeup and looked old and worn with pasty skin? I think not. I know I certainly would not! and he/she also would be thrown out of the courtroom!

Quoting EireLass:

This is interesting. Your statement of "I did not make the rules", makes me think that this is a rule in your workplace....that women must wear makeup. Do you feel that attorney's who don't wear makeup are unprofessional?

Quoting Ms.KitKat:

 No- not at all. I am professional at all times. However, in my line of work, I can not wear jeans and a t-shirt (my usual attire) when seeing clients. My clients are looking at me and expect a certain persona. It would be one thing if I pumped gas or tended bar. But I deal with other professionals, lawyers, etc...... as well as clients seeking my professional service. It's simply a persona that has to be presented. I did not make the rules. For example, at one point, I used to work at a courthouse. There was one judge in particluar who threw out of his court room attorneys whose shoes were not properly polished. This judge had an expectation of certain decorum.

Quoting EireLass:

Do you feel 'unprofessional' without makeup? Do you think people think differently of you with/without makeup?

Quoting Ms.KitKat: 
Quoting EireLass:

I was thinking today about this conversation while in the car. Why do we wear makeup? Be honest. Being honest: I wear makeup only when I am at work and I meeting with a client. In this way, I feel that I present a more professional tone. I also wear my "nice" clothes. It's a package I am trying to present to clients that I am professional. Otherwise, I do not wear makeup- only moisturizer-even to work.


 


 


 

jllcali
by Jane on Feb. 2, 2013 at 10:24 AM
I think part of why not so much attention is paid to objectification of men is that there are many men who want the attention. Some men seem to enjoy being viewed as a sex object, to them it makes them more manly in their eyes.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
la_bella_vita
by Bella on Feb. 2, 2013 at 7:09 PM

 Men are objectified in the same way but I think *some* men enjoy it.

AdrianneHill
by Platinum Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 9:36 PM
Most men welcome the possibility of extra people willing to worship their penis. So far they had to do it all themselves
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
MeAndTommyLee
by Platinum Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 9:39 PM

No, women are the first to scream they are offended or feel discriminated against.  It's truly sickening.  I can't appreciate a weak and whinny person of either sex, however women do seem to be in the lead. 

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