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Poll

Question: The major cause of my divorce was......

Options:

He cheated on me

I cheated on him

He said he didn't love me any more

I fell out of love with him

He did not fulfill my needs/expectations

I did not fulfill his needs/expectations

We argued too much

One of us has a mental illness the other couldn't deal with

One of us wanted kids and the other refused

He just left, didn't give a reason

Drug/alcohol abuse

Illegal activities

We just grew apart

Physical abuse

Other (please explain in comments)

Not divorced, just want to see the poll.

Any combination of the above (please explain in comments)

Emotional/mental abuse


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 69

View Results

I am curious as to why people get divorced. I'm including a poll so that women can answer without going into details. If you would like to comment, feel free to do so. Please do not bash or pass judgement upon those who reply or divorced people in general.
Thank you in advance to those who participate.
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 11:58 PM
Replies (11-20):
mama3814
by Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:09 AM

 I thought so too.

Quoting Whaaaaaa....O.o:

Quoting mama3814:




Wow. He must be as crazy as she was!!!

 

Whaaaaaa....O.o
by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:10 AM
Quoting karisma22:

My first husband was a pathological liar.  He couldn't tell the truth to save his life.




My ex is too. One of the reasons he was so good at hiding his "addiction" from me for so long. And why I thought all those years I deserved to be treated the way I was. He was sooooo good at lying. He could pass a lie detector with flying colors because he BELIEVES his lies.
soonergirl980
by Silver Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:11 AM

I've only been married once. If I was stupid enough to agree to elope with him when I found I was pregnant with my ex I could list several of those though.

mama3814
by Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:11 AM

 I'll admit that I don't really know much about mental illness, but that just didn't seem like a good idea. There was a man in our city that was recently arrested for shooting and killing his mentally ill son. The look on the dad's face was just pure anguish. It was sad.

Quoting bi-polarmommy:

 no shit his mom didn't get the baby, you dont leave an infant alone with a mentally unstable person, and paranoid schizophrenic is worse than bi-polar, and there were days when dh wouldn't leave the kids alone with ME when i was off my meds

Quoting mama3814:

 Not good at all. It didn't help that I refused to leave our infant son at home alone with her. He said it wasn't fair that my mom got to keep him and his didn't.

Quoting Whaaaaaa....O.o:

Quoting mama3814:

 I chose the "we argued too much" option. One of the biggest arguments was that he wanted to move his mother into our home. She actually did come stay for a while. She had been diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic and hated to take her meds.





Not good.

 

 

 

Jenniy
by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:15 AM
After his car accident he started cheating, became very abusive mentally, physically and sexually, and he started drinking and smoking pot, and was such an ass at work he was fired. While I was saving for a divorce he took our son's disability money, got an attorney and kicked our kids and I out.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
bi-polarmommy
by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:20 AM

 some people literally cannot handle another persons mental illness, and that's no shame on them, until they do something irrevocable like shooting their mentally ill child

but leaving a child with a unstable person is just asking for disaster

Quoting mama3814:

 I'll admit that I don't really know much about mental illness, but that just didn't seem like a good idea. There was a man in our city that was recently arrested for shooting and killing his mentally ill son. The look on the dad's face was just pure anguish. It was sad.

Quoting bi-polarmommy:

 no shit his mom didn't get the baby, you dont leave an infant alone with a mentally unstable person, and paranoid schizophrenic is worse than bi-polar, and there were days when dh wouldn't leave the kids alone with ME when i was off my meds

Quoting mama3814:

 Not good at all. It didn't help that I refused to leave our infant son at home alone with her. He said it wasn't fair that my mom got to keep him and his didn't.

Quoting Whaaaaaa....O.o:

Quoting mama3814:

 I chose the "we argued too much" option. One of the biggest arguments was that he wanted to move his mother into our home. She actually did come stay for a while. She had been diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic and hated to take her meds.





Not good.

 

 

 

 

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jllcali
by LoyalAndCute on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:31 AM
I was married, got divorced because he was participating in some nefarious activities that could easily put me in danger, and refused to stop when I gave him an ultimatum.

My daughter's father and I were engaged but not married, and I left because he was
manipulative, mentally abusive and cheated.

I sure know how to pick them, don't I?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
FrogSalad
by Sooze on Jan. 30, 2013 at 6:30 AM

A combination of factors, but his refusal to quit using drugs was the final straw.

punky3175
by Punky on Jan. 30, 2013 at 6:52 AM
1 mom liked this
I voted 'we grew apart' because it's what I tell people IRL who ask. But it was a combination: emotional abuse, I grew up - he never did, I couldn't be weak around him (because he's so emotionally weak and insecure it's ridiculous) and all of this lead to my falling out of love with him. 9 years later and I'm still happily single and don't know if I'll ever marry again. :-)
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
smalltowngal
by Platinum Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 8:10 AM



Quoting Jenniy:

After his car accident he started cheating, became very abusive mentally, physically and sexually, and he started drinking and smoking pot, and was such an ass at work he was fired. While I was saving for a divorce he took our son's disability money, got an attorney and kicked our kids and I out.


Did he hit his head during the car accident? 

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