Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

Should churches, pastors, or judges be sued for not wanting to perform a wedding ceremony?

Posted by   + Show Post

Apply any reason why this person chooses not do it.

Should people be able to force them to perform a ceremony?

by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 4:18 PM
Replies (61-70):
ArianEponae
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:04 PM

churches...If the church rents out to the public, then they need to be prepared to rent to anyone in the public who wants to rent, whether they agree with the person's chosen partner or not.  If they only rent out to members, then only members would be able to rent it.

pastors...No. Pastors generally require counselling sessions prior to the ceremony, and they say up front that they reserve the right to refuse if the couple doesn't complete the counselling or if the pastor feels that the couple is not ready for marriage.  As for ssm, if the pastor's religion says that it is not acceptable, he/she shouldn't be forced to perform the ceremony because doing so would violate their beliefs

judges...YES! A judge is supposed to be unbiased when they are in court.  Performing the ceremony is a part of the job in court, and therefore the judge needs to put aside their personal beliefs and follow the law that they are there to uphold

SWasson
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:07 PM

Churches or religious officiants—no, unless they've signed a contract with the couple saying that they can't back out.

Judges—yes.

Shlamoof
by New Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:12 PM

No.  They should be able to marry whomever they feel comfortable marrying.  If a marriage is against their beliefs or they honestly believe that the marriage will end in divorce, they should have every right to say no.

NWP
by guerrilla girl on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:12 PM

Anyone who can legally marry should be allowed by law to have a legal service.

Churches are private institutions and can operate on whatever rules they wish...

You do not have to have a church service to be legally married and you can still have a big wedding as a civil event with an official who is not a religious official legally able to perform the ceremony.

Quoting talia-mom:

They should be required to perform something the state doesn't say they have to conduct?


Quoting NWP:

Religious officials should be able to refuse to perform a ceremony on whatever reasons they have. Civil officials should be required to perform the legal ceremony regardless of their feelings.




North West Passage

Momniscient
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:18 PM

I don't think a judge has a legal right to deny a legal ceremony.


talia-mom
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:33 PM

That still doesn't answer my question.

Do they have to perform a service because they are allowed to perform them, not required to perform them?


Quoting NWP:

Anyone who can legally marry should be allowed by law to have a legal service.

Churches are private institutions and can operate on whatever rules they wish...

You do not have to have a church service to be legally married and you can still have a big wedding as a civil event with an official who is not a religious official legally able to perform the ceremony.

Quoting talia-mom:

They should be required to perform something the state doesn't say they have to conduct?


Quoting NWP:

Religious officials should be able to refuse to perform a ceremony on whatever reasons they have. Civil officials should be required to perform the legal ceremony regardless of their feelings.






talia-mom
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:34 PM

Depends on the state.   Judges don't have to perform marriage ceremonies in some states.


Quoting Momniscient:

I don't think a judge has a legal right to deny a legal ceremony.




talia-mom
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:35 PM

Not all states require judges to perform ceremonies.

This came up because I have been invited to a Sunday wedding.

The initial judge they asked refused because he doesn't work on Sundays.

Should he be sued because of this?


Quoting ArianEponae:


churches...If the church rents out to the public, then they need to be prepared to rent to anyone in the public who wants to rent, whether they agree with the person's chosen partner or not.  If they only rent out to members, then only members would be able to rent it.

pastors...No. Pastors generally require counselling sessions prior to the ceremony, and they say up front that they reserve the right to refuse if the couple doesn't complete the counselling or if the pastor feels that the couple is not ready for marriage.  As for ssm, if the pastor's religion says that it is not acceptable, he/she shouldn't be forced to perform the ceremony because doing so would violate their beliefs

judges...YES! A judge is supposed to be unbiased when they are in court.  Performing the ceremony is a part of the job in court, and therefore the judge needs to put aside their personal beliefs and follow the law that they are there to uphold



gravercem
by New Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:40 PM

 Judges can choose to refuse to marry a couple, know this as we have a friend who is a judge and has refused to marry a couple after sitting and talking to them about why they want to get married.  Churches can and should beable to refuse to marry couples if they feel they are not ready or are wanting to get married for the wrong reasons.

Maybe the divorce rate would not be so high if more judges and churches refused to marry people who they could tell were wanting to get married for the wrong reasons or had not thought about it enough.

Entering into marriage should not be rushed, it is a life long decision that both people need to think about and talk about.  Today it seems people rush into it and as soon as there are issues rush into divorce.

Euphoric
by Bazinga! on Feb. 5, 2013 at 6:41 PM

 bump

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)