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Edited: If You Don't Want Girls Judged by Their Hemlines, Stop Judging Them by Their Hemlines added example

Posted by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 6:42 AM
  • 84 Replies
1 mom liked this

Middle school teacher Jessica Lahey is very concerned about her students. She is particularly concerned about her short-skirt-wearing girl students, concerned for "their souls, their being, and their sense of self." And she has taken to the Atlantic to express this concern: 

I work hard to let my girls know that I respect them for their brains and character—regardless of whether they put their cleavage or the length of their legs on display. But I hate arguing about whether or not a skirt covers a girl as far down as her arms hang. I can't count the number of times a girl has complained to me that the relative length of her arms to her torso should be taken into account, that she is forced to wear long skirts because she is burdened with longer-than-usual arms. I hate having to defend my right not to see a girl's underwear. I hate having to tell a parent that yes, her daughter looked fine when she got out of the car, but her daughter rolled her shorts or skirt up once she got to school and was therefore inappropriately attired during first period. I hate having to worry that being able to see a girl's underwear will so addle the boys' brains that they will be unable to concentrate in science class.

At my high school, the belief was that boys lost their ability to perform well in school if they saw more than an inch above a girl's knee, and in some more religiously conservative communities, general thinking goes that a glimpse of hair is enough to terminate male concentration completely. Regardless of where you draw the line, of course, the argument remains the same: Girls are responsible not only for their own school performance but also for the boys'. Some, such as Lahey, may mistake this as a form of feminism by dressing the complaint up as merely a desire to teach the girls some self-respect, but I have a different word for the notion that a woman loses her claim to respect if she shows an overt interest in sexuality: sexism.

Lahey claims that she only wishes for girls to see that they "are not the measure of their hemlines, but the sum of their strong minds, kind hearts, and unlimited potential." That's a noble goal that I fully support. I recommend that Lahey start sending the message that she doesn't measure girls by their hemlines by not measuring them by their hemlines. Try ignoring their bodies completely and getting directly to the work of cherishing those minds and those hearts instead. As L.V. Anderson noted here recently, most of them will get tired of playing around with the tacky clothes you hate so much anyway.

As I noted last week in response to the smelling-salts brigade disapproving of BeyoncĂ©'s Super Bowl show, telling women to cover it up is just as surely a form of sexual objectification as telling women to take it off. Either way, you're reducing a woman to her sexuality instead of considering her as a whole person. Either way, you are, to quote Maya Dusenbery of Feministing, "looking at a woman and instead of seeing a full, complex, and multifaceted human being, all you see is ALL TEH SEXXX."

Girls don't learn self-respect by having teachers do what Lahey does: forcing them to pick from "a box of monstrously ugly, gigantic men's T-shirts purchased at the local thrift store" to punish and humiliate them for their outfits. What girls need to learn is that they count no matter what they wear or who they have sex with, and the best way to send that message is to start acting like you believe it's true. 

http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2013/02/15/dress_codes_for_girls_they_don_t_teach_self_respect_only_respecting_girls.html?google_editors_picks=true



Why is it as women we should have to be responsible for a males behavior or lack thereof?

Why are people so hung up about the body of women?



Going to use an example just so people understand

These are such outfit people in some areas try to shame young girls over including the teacher.



by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 6:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lga1965
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 6:49 AM
6 moms liked this

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelligence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.

stormcris
by Christy on Feb. 18, 2013 at 6:56 AM
1 mom liked this

Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.

Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


lga1965
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 7:07 AM

 Think about it.

The statue of David? LOL. As the Moms here always say "Apples and Oranges".

Good grief.

Quoting stormcris:

Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.

Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


 

stormcris
by Christy on Feb. 18, 2013 at 7:18 AM

Alright shifting back to the original...

How do clothes have any effect on your intelligence?

Quoting lga1965:

 Think about it.

The statue of David? LOL. As the Moms here always say "Apples and Oranges".

Good grief.

Quoting stormcris:

Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.

Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


 


lga1965
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 7:31 AM
2 moms liked this

 It doesn't effect your intelligence, it just advertises what you want people to think about you. You need to look like you're serious and not just a flashy broad showing off your body. Why downgrade yourself and make yourself look like an airhead? Intelligent women display their minds and minimize their bodies as sexy. Sexy women are also intelligent when they value their mind and dress properly.

Are you thinking about Erin Brokovich,as played by Julia Roberts? LOL.She is the only woman with intelligence and goals who also dresses like a hooker!  But we need to be realistic and advertise something other than our boobs on a daily basis.

Quoting stormcris:

Alright shifting back to the original...

How do clothes have any effect on your intelligence?

Quoting lga1965:

 Think about it.

The statue of David? LOL. As the Moms here always say "Apples and Oranges".

Good grief.

Quoting stormcris:

Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.

Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


 


 

stormcris
by Christy on Feb. 18, 2013 at 7:38 AM
2 moms liked this

It is very interesting and sad that the upper social class has this much effect so far in the future from when they started this to keep the classes divided.

Quoting lga1965:

 It doesn't effect your intelligence, it just advertises what you want people to think about you. You need to look like you're serious and not just a flashy broad showing off your body. Why downgrade yourself and make yourself look like an airhead? Intelligent women display their minds and minimize their bodies as sexy. Sexy women are also intelligent when they value their mind and dress properly.

Are you thinking about Erin Brokovich,as played by Julia Roberts? LOL.She is the only woman with intelligence and goals who also dresses like a hooker!  But we need to be realistic and advertise something other than our boobs on a daily basis.

Quoting stormcris:

Alright shifting back to the original...

How do clothes have any effect on your intelligence?

Quoting lga1965:

 Think about it.

The statue of David? LOL. As the Moms here always say "Apples and Oranges".

Good grief.

Quoting stormcris:

Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.

Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.

Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.

Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


 


 


jessilin0113
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 7:59 AM
1 mom liked this
If you want minds valued more than bodies, then do what the article says and stop making a big deal about girls' clothing.


Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.


Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelligence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.


Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
lga1965
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 8:08 AM
Well that makes no sense at all.

Quoting jessilin0113:

If you want minds valued more than bodies, then do what the article says and stop making a big deal about girls' clothing.




Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.



Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelligence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.



Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lga1965
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 8:11 AM
This has nothing to do with "upper class" or middle or lower class.
I give up.
You're not catching on.
This is a Blog, not even believable.


Quoting stormcris:

It is very interesting and sad that the upper social class has this much effect so far in the future from when they started this to keep the classes divided.

Quoting lga1965:

 It doesn't effect your intelligence, it just advertises what you want people to think about you. You need to look like you're serious and not just a flashy broad showing off your body. Why downgrade yourself and make yourself look like an airhead? Intelligent women display their minds and minimize their bodies as sexy. Sexy women are also intelligent when they value their mind and dress properly.


Are you thinking about Erin Brokovich,as played by Julia Roberts? LOL.She is the only woman with intelligence and goals who also dresses like a hooker!  But we need to be realistic and advertise something other than our boobs on a daily basis.


Quoting stormcris:


Alright shifting back to the original...


How do clothes have any effect on your intelligence?


Quoting lga1965:


 Think about it.


The statue of David? LOL. As the Moms here always say "Apples and Oranges".


Good grief.


Quoting stormcris:


Is it not true that if a person has sex on the brain that a gunny sack would be just as much of an advertisement for them if the person appealed to the viewer in some way? Why is it that seeing more of the human body automatically means they are advertising for sex? It is curious to me as when most people look at the statue of David they do not think it is advertising for sex.


Quoting lga1965:


 Judgeing? LOL.


Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertsising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelklugence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.


Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.




 




 


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jessilin0113
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 8:11 AM
3 moms liked this
Why not? What does a short skirt have to do with girls as whole people? You are saying short skirt = slut and are devaluing them just as much as you say they devalue themselves. Clothes don't make the man, right? Why should they make the woman?


Quoting lga1965:

Well that makes no sense at all.



Quoting jessilin0113:

If you want minds valued more than bodies, then do what the article says and stop making a big deal about girls' clothing.






Quoting lga1965:

 Judgeing? LOL.




Its just basic intelligence to KNOW that we don't have to wear short skirts and tight low cut tops to feel like a woman. In fact, if you wear clothes like that you are advertising sex and  "dumbing yourself down". A woman with intelligence and goals in life ( other than being sexy) will wear normal, appropriate clothing. Teens and sometimes younger girls are being sold flashy and overly sexy clothing in stores---the mannequins look like hookers.




Lets value our minds higher than our bodies, okay? And it has nothing to do with how boys react. That is their problem. It only speaks for a girls' or woman's mind.



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