Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

Transgender Fountain 1st grader banned from girls bathroom, discrimination claim filed

Posted by   + Show Post

 Since transgender seems to be the hot topic.....

http://www.denverpost.com/breakingnews/ci_22674172/transgender-fountain-1st-grader-banned-from-girls-bathroom?utm_medium=facebook

Transgender Fountain 1st grader banned from girls bathroom, discrimination claim filed

Posted: 02/26/2013 05:25:40 PM MST
February 27, 2013 1:2 AM GMTUpdated: 02/26/2013 06:02:32 PM MST
By Colleen O'Connor
The Denver Post
denverpost.com


 

 

6-year-old Coy Mathis (Photo provided by Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund)

The parents of a transgender 6-year-old have filed a complaint with the Colorado Civil Rights Division because Eagleside Elementary School in Fountain has banned the 1st grader from using the girl's bathroom.

The child, Coy Mathis, was born male but identifies as female. She has attended the school since December 2011.

"This is significant for both Colorado, and nationally," said Michael Silverman, executive director of the Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund, who is representing the family. "For Colorado, it is the first test of the Colorado Anti-Discrimination Act as related to access to bathrooms by transgender students.

"On a national level, as we see more and more transgender people coming out at younger and younger ages, people will be watching what happens in Colorado."

In November, a Maine state court ruled that a school district did not violate a transgender student's rights under the Maine Human Rights Act when it prohibited her from using the girls' restroom.

Transgender identity is a relatively new issue in the nation and so there is little uniformity among school district policies. Some in Colorado, including Boulder Valley Schools, have already crafted detailed policies citing the state Anti-Discrimination Act. Others have not.

Boulder's four-page set of guidelines specifically addresses restroom accessibility, stating that "students shall have access to the restroom that corresponds to their gender identity consistently asserted at school."

The policy was developed about five years ago because "the district has long been committed to the inclusion of sexual orientation and gender identity," said district spokesman Briggs Gamblin.

Every two years, the district participates Boulder County's Youth Risk Behavior Survey, which "consistently has found one of the high-risk groups for teen suicide are GLBT or questioning. It's critically important that these students feel included - part of the community, not separated from it," Gamblin said.

Coy Mathis wears girls' clothing and students and staff used the female pronouns when referring to her. But Fountain-Fort Carson School District 8 administrators decided over winter break that the child should use the boys bathroom, or the staff restroom or one in the school nurse's office.

That decision took into account "not only Coy, but other students in the building, their parents, and the future impact a boy, with male genitals, using a girls' bathroom would have as Coy grew older," said Wm. Kelly Dude, a lawyer representing the school district wrote in a Dec. 28 letter to Silverman.

Dude argued that the district is in compliance with the Colorado Anti-Discrimination Act because "Coy attends class as all other students, is permitted to wear girls' clothes, and is referred to as the parents have requested," and was allowed access to single-user restrooms used by employees or gender-neutral restrooms in the school's health room.

Coy's parents, Kathryn and Jeremy Mathis, took her out of school. She is being homeschooled until the issue is resolved.

The family will appear at a press conference at 11 a.m. Wednesday on the west steps of the State Capitol to announce the filing of the complaint.

"It's important for us to talk about this, because a lot of people have been so afraid to be their true selves for so long," Kathryn Mathis said. "They've know from very young children who they are, but were afraid to tell. We want to help create a society where it's OK to be who you are."

She said that as soon as Coy began to talk, she insisted that she was a girl, not a boy.

As parents, they were sad and upset when they heard that Coy could no longer use the girls bathroom at school, Kathryn Mathis said.

"This automatically singles her out and stigmatizes her," she said. "It sets her up for future harassing and bullying, and creates an unsafe environment. The school has a wonderful opportunity to teach students that differences are OK, and we should embrace their differences, instead of teaching them to discriminate against someone who is a little different."

 

 Thoughts?

by on Feb. 26, 2013 at 8:18 PM
Replies (41-50):
IhaveHisjoy
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:00 PM
1 mom liked this

 Agree...

Quoting MeAndTommyLee:

Seriously?  How in the hell does a 6 year old have a gender identity crisis?  Bash me all you please.  I don't give a damn.  The parents sound like nut jobs.  It's no wonder the kid is having confusion.  Or is it his confusion at all?

 

"Our society strives to avoid any possibility of offending anyone- except God"...Billy Graham
tscritch
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:01 PM
2 moms liked this

 Where are you getting that they "pushed" her to be a girl? How do you know what the parents are going through? Just because you don't like it and would shame your child into being who they are not does not mean all parents are as closed minded and not in tune with their child/ren.

What if they "forced" her to be a boy.....do you think she would magically wake up one day and say wow...I'm a boy?

Read a pp of someone that knows this family.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

Little kids have no clue what boy/girl means...if they would have just treated him as a child instead of pushing girl..things may be very differnt now.

Quoting tscritch:

 Maybe if they didn't support their child then the child would have even bigger issues. Maybe they thought forcing their child to be the "norm" would be the worse choice for their child.

Comparing a transgender persons feelings of gender identity to that of wanting to be a pretend superhero is silly and degrading.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 The parents would be good parents if treated the child like a child..He is far too young, his brain is not fully developed(thinking, reasoning processes) to decide this.

Maybe if they hadn't jumped into playing along he may have been over this idea ...we will never know now.

Some kids want to be superman when they are little..do you say ok and let him try to fly off the roof?

 

Quoting tscritch:

 So the parents would be good parents if they forced her to act/behave/do everything in a manner that goes against who she feels she is?

I have a 6 year old and they are pretty smart and intuned...I don't think the parents decided she was a girl on a whim!!

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 He is a boy..he needs to use the boys restroom. SHAME on those parents allowing this child to make a choice such as this at the age of 6. Senseless parents...Shame on the school for playing along calling him..her.

Sounds like they really wanted to have a girl..he was offered alternatives...

 

 

 

 

 

AdellesMom
by on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:01 PM
Ducky isn't wrong, and it isn't a choice. You honestly don't understand, and that's okay.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

LOL, you really need to get over it..You are wrong , plain and simple.
The shame remains on you...

Quoting purpleducky:

And this just proves you do not know psychology. Shame on you for thinking it is a choice.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 He is a boy..he needs to use the boys restroom. SHAME on those parents allowing this child to make a choice such as this at the age of 6. Senseless parents...Shame on the school for playing along calling him..her.


Sounds like they really wanted to have a girl..he was offered alternatives...


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Bookwormy
by Platinum Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:01 PM
What's your professional clinical licensure? Obviously you're a therapist, psychologist, pedi neurologist, pediatrician at least with all your obvious expertise. Please do share something professional other than your faithful handle!


Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

LOL, you really need to get over it..You are wrong , plain and simple.
The shame remains on you...

Quoting purpleducky:

And this just proves you do not know psychology. Shame on you for thinking it is a choice.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 He is a boy..he needs to use the boys restroom. SHAME on those parents allowing this child to make a choice such as this at the age of 6. Senseless parents...Shame on the school for playing along calling him..her.


Sounds like they really wanted to have a girl..he was offered alternatives...



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
FromAtoZ
by AllieCat on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:01 PM


Quoting meriana:

It has been suggested in other threads that uni-sex facilities be set up regarding bathrooms, locker/changing rooms, etc. for trans-gender people but it's seems doing that is also seen as discrimination.

I don't see it that way.  If some one is safe from the possibility of others harassing and can do what they need to do in private, I see that as a plus.

Not just for those who are transgender.  For any one.  I know plenty of people, of all ages, who have an aversion to public restrooms.  Some very well do not use them, including students, and many others would prefer a single stall.  That isn't always possible so many will use the single stall 'family' restrooms.

I don't know what the answer is. 

AdellesMom
by on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:02 PM
Why can't the school get a unisex bathroom and make everyone happy?
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
angelachristine
by Bronze Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:03 PM
Yeah but as the person gets older how long until someone gets assaulted or something and then what will happen, the school will get sued. Its a huge liability I understand both sides and don't really know what the best thing to do would be.


Quoting EireLass:

Men's rooms have toilets too. They poop you know.

Quoting angelachristine:

i'm not really sure maybe no one but if they allow this child then they would have to allow a transgender female to male and the men's rooms have urinals so that would be a problem.

Quoting CreamCheeze:

I've been in both men's and women's bathrooms and don't recall ever seeing urinals in the ladies room. I'd also assume she sits down to pee, and likely with the door closed.Who exactly will see her penis?



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
MrsSamMerlotte
by Bronze Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:03 PM
1 mom liked this
Maybe we should start calling them the penis room and vagina room instead of the girls or boys room. Wtf. They gave the child plenty of options. All the children should be taken into consideration, not just one.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Bookwormy
by Platinum Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:03 PM
Scientific research please! & your licensure of course!


Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

Little kids have no clue what boy/girl means...if they would have just treated him as a child instead of pushing girl..things may be very differnt now.


Quoting tscritch:


 Maybe if they didn't support their child then the child would have even bigger issues. Maybe they thought forcing their child to be the "norm" would be the worse choice for their child.


Comparing a transgender persons feelings of gender identity to that of wanting to be a pretend superhero is silly and degrading.


Quoting IhaveHisjoy:


 The parents would be good parents if treated the child like a child..He is far too young, his brain is not fully developed(thinking, reasoning processes) to decide this.


Maybe if they hadn't jumped into playing along he may have been over this idea ...we will never know now.


Some kids want to be superman when they are little..do you say ok and let him try to fly off the roof?


 


Quoting tscritch:


 So the parents would be good parents if they forced her to act/behave/do everything in a manner that goes against who she feels she is?


I have a 6 year old and they are pretty smart and intuned...I don't think the parents decided she was a girl on a whim!!


Quoting IhaveHisjoy:


 He is a boy..he needs to use the boys restroom. SHAME on those parents allowing this child to make a choice such as this at the age of 6. Senseless parents...Shame on the school for playing along calling him..her.


Sounds like they really wanted to have a girl..he was offered alternatives...


 


 


 


 


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
IhaveHisjoy
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 9:04 PM

 If you want to chat about this, fine...I won't continue a conversation with you if you can't act civil..and want to make assumptions..

Quoting tscritch:

 Where are you getting that they "pushed" her to be a girl? How do you know what the parents are going through? Just because you don't like it and would shame your child into being who they are not does not mean all parents are as closed minded and not in tune with their child/ren.

What if they "forced" her to be a boy.....do you think she would magically wake up one day and say wow...I'm a boy?

Read a pp of someone that knows this family.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

Little kids have no clue what boy/girl means...if they would have just treated him as a child instead of pushing girl..things may be very differnt now.

Quoting tscritch:

 Maybe if they didn't support their child then the child would have even bigger issues. Maybe they thought forcing their child to be the "norm" would be the worse choice for their child.

Comparing a transgender persons feelings of gender identity to that of wanting to be a pretend superhero is silly and degrading.

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 The parents would be good parents if treated the child like a child..He is far too young, his brain is not fully developed(thinking, reasoning processes) to decide this.

Maybe if they hadn't jumped into playing along he may have been over this idea ...we will never know now.

Some kids want to be superman when they are little..do you say ok and let him try to fly off the roof?

 

Quoting tscritch:

 So the parents would be good parents if they forced her to act/behave/do everything in a manner that goes against who she feels she is?

I have a 6 year old and they are pretty smart and intuned...I don't think the parents decided she was a girl on a whim!!

Quoting IhaveHisjoy:

 He is a boy..he needs to use the boys restroom. SHAME on those parents allowing this child to make a choice such as this at the age of 6. Senseless parents...Shame on the school for playing along calling him..her.

Sounds like they really wanted to have a girl..he was offered alternatives...

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Our society strives to avoid any possibility of offending anyone- except God"...Billy Graham
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN