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I pay my son to brush his teeth Edit in black

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Brushing teeth, changing clothes, showering, making healthy choices, doing chores, all of these were battles that me and ds fought on a daily basis.

I'm stressed out, he's stressed out, I don't know what to do. The a light bulb went off!lightbulbHe loves money. *Think Mr Crabs* So we started giving him a point on a chart every time he does the above. Each point is worth 2 cents. Like magic my son is now changing his underwear without being asked and brushing this teeth twice a day. It is sooo worth the 10 cents a day,lol.

Forgot to add something important. My son is 8 and has SPD Sensory Processing Disorder. He finds a lot of things we don't notice VERY uncomfortable. The feel of a tooth brush in his mouth, new washed clothes on his body, the textures of many, many foods, and so many other things. Money is something he enjoys so it helps motivate him to do things he finds unpleasant.

by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 6:58 PM
Replies (21-30):
paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM
1 mom liked this

Actually he changes them in the morning. He takes a bath at night. I'd prefer he change them after a bath but hey, I'll take what I can get.

Quoting ambcortez:

You said he was changing his underwear without being asked and I was wondering if he changes them daily without taking a bath or does he change them after a bath. I've noticed that a lot of moms have their kids change their underwear without taking a bath first and that's just weird to me, personally.

Quoting paganbaby:

Huh?

Quoting ambcortez:

Changing underwear after or without taking a bath? 




Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

mehamil1
by Platinum Member on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM

For now. It won't down the road. You don't reward kids for doing stuff they should already be doing in the first place. 

Quoting paganbaby:

I'm rewarding him because it helps.

Quoting mehamil1:

You are rewarding your child for doing something he should be doing in the first place. You should not reward a child for doing something they should already be doing. 

It's an uphill battle to get these kids to take care of themselves. You have to do it over and over and over again. I get that it's frustrating but hey, that's life. My son is nine and still gives me a hard time about all of that and more but I still make him do it, fight or no fight. Eventually it becomes a habit they fall into. Or not. Hopefully by then he'll be out of your house and stinking up his own. 

turtle68
by Mahinaarangi on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM

 

Quoting lga1965:

 

Quoting turtle68:

meh...its not a battle when you are consistant. IMO washing hands after the toilet, brushing teeth, showering and changing clothes..gets done once you do so yourself and ensure they do it, every time it is needed.

Kids do what the parents do.

My kids do chores when I tell them to...the consequences of not doing them when asked is too high for them :-) Fortunately for them...its only once a week or a small chore daily. They get money for extra jobs such as cleaning the car or cleaning out the kitchen cupboards.

I dont give money for something I expect of them.

 I don't either but who are we to criticize her ? Nobody is perfect. Nobody has all THE right answers to parenting.

 didnt think I was criticizing her :-)  Judging...yes.  I think its lazy parenting when you have to pay your kid to be hygenic.

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM


Quoting lga1965:

 

Quoting turtle68:

meh...its not a battle when you are consistant. IMO washing hands after the toilet, brushing teeth, showering and changing clothes..gets done once you do so yourself and ensure they do it, every time it is needed.

Kids do what the parents do.

My kids do chores when I tell them to...the consequences of not doing them when asked is too high for them :-) Fortunately for them...its only once a week or a small chore daily. They get money for extra jobs such as cleaning the car or cleaning out the kitchen cupboards.

I dont give money for something I expect of them.

 I don't either but who are we to criticize her ? Nobody is perfect. Nobody has all THE right answers to parenting.

Thank you!

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

ambcortez
by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:20 PM

Okay, just wondering. You do what works for you the best way you know how. That's parenting and if your kids are happy, you're doing it right.

Quoting paganbaby:

Actually he changes them in the morning. He takes a bath at night. I'd prefer he change them after a bath but hey, I'll take what I can get.

Quoting ambcortez:

You said he was changing his underwear without being asked and I was wondering if he changes them daily without taking a bath or does he change them after a bath. I've noticed that a lot of moms have their kids change their underwear without taking a bath first and that's just weird to me, personally.

Quoting paganbaby:

Huh?

Quoting ambcortez:

Changing underwear after or without taking a bath? 





mehamil1
by Platinum Member on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:20 PM

Is this the kid you also still breast feed? 

And also the kid you allow to have his own bedroom while you and your husband sleep on the floor in the living room because he needs his "space"? 

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:26 PM

You make that sound so bad LOL

But yes, I completely agree.

Quoting eema.gray:

I think bribery and/or payments are legitimate means to motivate a child until the develop the habits and discipline to do it without external motivation. Internal motivation takes much longer to develop. We don't see high school kids needing point charts to track behavior and doing one's homework even of those were staples in their grade school classrooms.


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:27 PM

Awwww...you remember me! I'm so flattered :-)

Quoting Mom2KIL:

Well, for someone who has to buy their kids Christmas candy for their stocking with their foodstamps or sends their daughter to church for a break (these were some of your previous post) it doesn't surprise me that this would be your parenting style. I'm sure it will work out great! *eyeroll*


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

lga1965
by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:27 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting Mom2KIL:

Well, for someone who has to buy their kids Christmas candy for their stocking with their foodstamps or sends their daughter to church for a break (these were some of your previous post) it doesn't surprise me that this would be your parenting style. I'm sure it will work out great! *eyeroll*

 tsk tskthat was rude. Judgemental. Does this help your ego?

paganbaby
by Teflon Don on Mar. 3, 2013 at 7:28 PM
1 mom liked this

Thanks for understanding. His sisters were never paid to bathe,lol. They didn't need to.

Quoting Debmomto2girls:

That is what I thought. It's not something I would normally do but I wouldn't judge someone who has to deal with these issues to do what works. Good luck:)

Quoting paganbaby:

It is, yes.

For him doing a lot of these things are very uncomfortable. Feel of the tooth brush in his mouth, new clothes on his body, ect. So this kinda helps give him the extra incentive.

Quoting Debmomto2girls:

I am sorry if I am wrong but is this the child with problems?



Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

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