Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Current Events & Hot Topics Current Events & Hot Topics

If your husband/significant other has an affair, is it any of your business?

Posted by   + Show Post
Another poster got me thinking...she basically believes that anything she does is her own business and not her husband's and everything her husband does that he chooses to keep to himself is his private business and not hers. They have no right to each others privacy.

So, if your husband has an affair or several is it any if your business? Why or why not?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 3:17 PM
Replies (21-30):
amylovesnick07
by Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:26 PM
Yes I do believe it is my business if he were to cheat.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
LindaClement
by Thatwoman on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:27 PM

I think you'll find that life is slightly more complicated than this simplicity.

Quoting hopealways4019:

Yes it's my business, because im sleeping with him, exposing myself to stds. Also he better not be taking household money spurgling on mistress. Dont wanna be faithful, shouldn't be marry.


tifbrown
by on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:29 PM
2 moms liked this

Absolutely. We committed to fidelity. And, not only that, it puts me at risk and exposure to dirty slut germs.

amylovesnick07
by Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:31 PM
1 mom liked this
Not trying to be rude I promise but what would happen if your DH was sleeping around and he gave you some STD's or HIV? That isn't any of your business either?


Quoting LindaClement:

It isn't.

Just as muslimahpj said.

Quoting Paperfishies:

She also went on to state that if he or she chooses NOT to share something they have done it is not any of the other spouses business.





Quoting muslimahpj:

If I remember the convo correctly, the other person stated that if they were in therapy to try to work on their relationship, what would either party gain from knowing about the affair, correct?  If that is the scenario, in a way, I agree with her. If they are already trying to work things out, why bring that out in the open and cause even more pain? Sometimes it's not always best to 'let it all out', especially if there are selfish motives involved.





Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
LindaClement
by Thatwoman on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:31 PM

Living with other people also puts you at risk and exposure to every other kind of infection and communicable disease... from hepatitis to TB.

I suppose my question is: would you live with someone with any kind of contagious disease?

Interesting point: the only person whom you expect anyone who is committed to you would be attracted to is a 'dirty slut'?

Quoting tifbrown:

Absolutely. We committed to fidelity. And, not only that, it puts me at risk and exposure to dirty slut germs.


LindaClement
by Thatwoman on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:35 PM

You're rather assuming that whoever my husband --who I have reason to believe has rather good taste in women-- is very likely to have untreated STDs.

If dh contracted HepA in a foreign country (he's in the navy, it's epidemic in some places and very hard to avoid) and passed it on to me before he found out ... then what?

How would that be any different TO ME to what you're offering in the way of possibilities?

Quoting amylovesnick07:

Not trying to be rude I promise but what would happen if your DH was sleeping around and he gave you some STD's or HIV? That isn't any of your business either?


Quoting LindaClement:

It isn't.

Just as muslimahpj said.

Quoting Paperfishies:

She also went on to state that if he or she chooses NOT to share something they have done it is not any of the other spouses business.





Quoting muslimahpj:

If I remember the convo correctly, the other person stated that if they were in therapy to try to work on their relationship, what would either party gain from knowing about the affair, correct?  If that is the scenario, in a way, I agree with her. If they are already trying to work things out, why bring that out in the open and cause even more pain? Sometimes it's not always best to 'let it all out', especially if there are selfish motives involved.






AlekD
by Gold Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:36 PM
1 mom liked this

O_o


Of course it's my business. It's OUR marriage.

Paperfishies
by Silver Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM
1 mom liked this
Fidelity matters to most people. If I caught herpes from a toilet seat, yeah I would be pissed off...

If I caught herpes from my husband because he was screwing the woman next door, I would be hurt, pissed and a million other things. I don't trust toilet seats, toilet seats don't owe me anything...I trust my husband and he owes me fidelity.


Quoting LindaClement:

You're rather assuming that whoever my husband --who I have reason to believe has rather good taste in women-- is very likely to have untreated STDs.

If dh contracted HepA in a foreign country (he's in the navy, it's epidemic in some places and very hard to avoid) and passed it on to me before he found out ... then what?

How would that be any different TO ME to what you're offering in the way of possibilities?

Quoting amylovesnick07:

Not trying to be rude I promise but what would happen if your DH was sleeping around and he gave you some STD's or HIV? That isn't any of your business either?





Quoting LindaClement:

It isn't.

Just as muslimahpj said.

Quoting Paperfishies:

She also went on to state that if he or she chooses NOT to share something they have done it is not any of the other spouses business.








Quoting muslimahpj:

If I remember the convo correctly, the other person stated that if they were in therapy to try to work on their relationship, what would either party gain from knowing about the affair, correct?  If that is the scenario, in a way, I agree with her. If they are already trying to work things out, why bring that out in the open and cause even more pain? Sometimes it's not always best to 'let it all out', especially if there are selfish motives involved.









Posted on CafeMom Mobile
momtoscott
by Platinum Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM

 Yes, it's my business. 

PinkButterfly66
by Gold Member on Mar. 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM

Damn straight it is!  We took vows to be faithful to each other. An affair breaks that vows and is grounds for divorce.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)