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CNN: Special report features hundreds of women who regret their abortions

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To coincide with the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade earlier this year, CNN asked its readers two questions: Have you had an abortion? How do you feel about it now?

CNN had a whopping 539 iReports filed in response. Hundreds of stories poured in, as women shared their choices, their reasons, their grief, and rarely, their satisfaction. One thing was made abundantly clear by CNN’s efforts: women regret their abortions. And they need to talk about them.

Women named their stories out of a deep sense of heartache:

Until we meet again

Soul-deep ache

Self-medicating did not heal my pain

What I had destroyed was not just tissue

Abortion is a forever punishment for women

I never got over it

Broken.

The pain of abortion stays with women. (Photo credit: craigCloutier on Flickr)

The pain of abortion stays with women for a lifetime. (Photo credit: craigCloutier on Flickr)

If only women would read such stories – hundreds of them – before making a choice for abortion. If only women did not have to look back in pain, regretting an unchangeable choice.

If only, instead, they could look ahead to a bright future without death because they know the facts, know the heartache, and know the grief without having to experience them firsthand.

These are the stories we must share. These are the stories we must shout from the rooftops. These are the stories that tell the truth. As one woman titled her article, “Because abortion affects everything!

Friends drive each other to the clinic and then never speak about it again. This ‘surgery’ literally changes a person’s life forever… and we are suddenly mute! …

My name is Stacy Massey and I am the President and Founding Partner of Abortion Recovery InterNational (ARIN), an international association of peer, professional and pastoral counselors helping families work through the emotional, psychological and spiritual pain of abortion.

We receive over 100 requests PER DAY from individuals and families looking for after abortion help. Over 250,000 hurting people have contacted us just in the last 5 years.

One simple, quick and legal abortion can impact 40-50 people in a lifetime.  Abortion effects everyone! …

[T]he death of my own two children to abortion prompted me to “do something” to help others.  Abortion trauma does not discriminate. It doesn’t matter how much money you make, where you live, the color of your skin or which gender you claim. The pain of abortion is everywhere.

A mother's child - dead or alive - is never far from her thoughts. (Photo credit: Nathan Csonka Photography on Flickr)

A mother’s child – dead or alive – is never far from her thoughts. (Photo credit: Nathan Csonka Photography on Flickr)

Over and over, in CNN’s iReports, women expressed pain that only a mother could understand. Some shared horrific stories of forced abortions; others shared their long journeys to forgiveness; many told of grief that has never left them. Tricia wrote:

Abortion is sold as a woman’s right. A solution to unwanted pregnancy. A quick procedure that once over, never has to be thought about again. I chose abortion at 18 years old. Now, 37 years later, I certainly have not forgotten. We are told that a woman has the right to control her own body as if abortion is a means of control. Once chosen, abortion creates its own affects. The physical, emotional, and psychological effects are beyond our control. Abortion does what it is designed to do….Kill and destroy; abrubtly halt an ongoing process… the process of LIFE. No woman is ever freed by abortion. …

Abortion is NOT for women it is AGAINST us.

No statement could be more true.

source

If your child is medically treated in the state of New York, don’t count on getting any information from the hospital ‒ unless you have your child’s permission.
Russell S. Hepler, of Transformation 1202 Ministries, found out this sobering reality firsthand when he learned last month that parental rights are becoming a thing of the past in the Empire State
“My 15-year-old step son dislocated his finger in a gym class accident,” Hepler informed Instant Analysis. “Since the closest hospital emergency room to where we live is located in New York State, a few miles away, it was the obvious choice for treatment. He was seen by a doctor in the E R and had the finger put back in place.”
But the dislocated finger ended up not being the most painful aspect of the experience.
“[A] few weeks later, the first bill for services arrived from the hospital,” recalled Hepler, author of the book Yes! We Can Turn America Around: A Practical Guide for Christian Political Involvement. “At first we thought it a bit strange that the bill came in his name since he is a minor and since our health insurance is through my wife’s employer and is in her name.”
Hepler’s wife soon found that one error led to another.
“When my wife examined the bill, it contained a few errors of personal information,” Hepler relayed. “My wife phoned the hospital and health insurance company to get the errors corrected before dealing with the bill so that there would be no future confusion about identity information.”
What soon entailed made the Hepler family feel like they were placed in the midst of a Twilight Zone episode.
Records … what records?
“She was informed by someone from the health insurance provider that they could not discuss the bill with her,” continued Hepler, who is a conference speaker on Christian issues. “When asked why they couldn’t possibly discuss her child’s medical bill, which her insurance would be involved in paying, she was told that according to New York State law, since her son is over the age o - See more at: http://www.instantanalysis.net/afa-blogs/2013/03/12/the-empire-state-strikes-back-%E2%80%A6-against-parental-rights#sthash.f99oGnqZ.dpuf
by on Mar. 12, 2013 at 8:34 AM
Replies (31-40):
PinkButterfly66
by Gold Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:31 AM

There was a survey done, it is quite public and that was the finding.  The majority of surveyors who had abortions DID NOT regret the decision at all.  Look it up.

Quoting 12hellokitty:


Who are you to speak for how the majority of women feel after having an abortion?

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Exactly, the majority of women who obtain abortions do not regret it at all.  They see it as a positive decision.  When I had my abortion, I was just out of college, broke, unemployed and unable to support myself, let alone a child.  I did not regret my decision then, I felt only relief afterward.  I never felt guilt either.

Quoting IhartU:

 One-sided and meant to make it look like the majority of women regret it and are emotionally scarred by it.

 Those women who wrote they had regrets obviously do and they NEED to talk about it which is why they wrote in. Maybe those who are perfectly okay with their decision have moved on and have no reason to dwell on it and tell their story.





Woodbabe
by Woodie on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:31 AM
4 moms liked this

Are they doing a counter-special on the millions of women that feel they made the right choice for themselves? Or how about all the women who were left unable to have children before abortion was legalized and safe? Let's also interview starving and abused and unwanted children forced to be born because abortions weren't available for whatever reason too....Most of them are probably found in your local juvie detainment center.

Koltie6
by Bronze Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:32 AM
1 mom liked this
Attitudes like this are the downfall of our society! If I thought like that I would be ashamed to admit it.


Quoting Donna6503:

You'll find more people who regret having sex ... Or talking up smoking for that matter

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desertlvn
by Silver Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:32 AM
1 mom liked this


I second this. I also feel that there will never be an open dialogue about this because of the stigma attached to abortion. When people call women who have had the procedure murderers and when some go as far as to kill doctors, women will not feel safe to open up about the subject.

Quoting romalove:

A million and a half abortions or so a year.

Multiplied over 40 years.

Now they have "hundreds" of people with regret.

Well, I would say that would be expected.  The percentage is infinitessimally small.

If you did a poll about people who had their babies and asked if they regretted having them, with a stat pool of millions to choose from, I guarantee you you could find "hundreds" that regretted it and could make a nice documentary about them, too.



KamWorthy
by Silver Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:34 AM
Ok...I didn't ask if it was or wasn't.....but thanks for the info anyway. :)
Quoting romalove:


Quoting KamWorthy:

I know several women who have had abortions. Many regretted it, some forgave themselves and moved on and prospered. Some tried not to think about it, suffered in silence, became drunks, pot heads, and permiscuios, and PTSD. I don't know one person who has had an abortion that came out unscathed. Since the emotional trauma of an abortion can lie dormant for 10 years, there is still much to come to fruition.

I know lots of women who had abortions and didn't regret them.  I know two people who had multiple abortions and are glad they had them.  I know one person who had an abortion and wishes she hadn't.

My experience is most don't regret.  

Both of our experiences are anecdotal and without any scientific weight or merit.

Koltie6
by Bronze Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:34 AM
4 moms liked this
Lol control? Control would have been not having sex , getting pregnant and using abortion for birth control. ! Sometimes the truth hurts.


Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Ya know what? You are so full of self-righteous s*it!  You do not get to decide what I (or anybody else, for that matter) does with her body.  I exercised control over my body and fertility.  I exercised my 14th Amendment right.  So STFU!

Quoting Koltie6:

If your not responsible enough then you shouldn't be having sex at all. Abortion should not be used for birth control. Too bad they don't teach common sense and good judgement in college!





Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Exactly, the majority of women who obtain abortions do not regret it at all.  They see it as a positive decision.  When I had my abortion, I was just out of college, broke, unemployed and unable to support myself, let alone a child.  I did not regret my decision then, I felt only relief afterward.  I never felt guilt either.

Quoting IhartU:

 One-sided and meant to make it look like the majority of women regret it and are emotionally scarred by it.



 Those women who wrote they had regrets obviously do and they NEED to talk about it which is why they wrote in. Maybe those who are perfectly okay with their decision have moved on and have no reason to dwell on it and tell their story.






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desertlvn
by Silver Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:38 AM
1 mom liked this


A perfect example of why women in this country don't feel safe enough to openly discuss this topic. Congrats, Koltie on coming off like a neanderthal.

Quoting Koltie6:

Lol control? Control would have been not having sex , getting pregnant and using abortion for birth control. ! Sometimes the truth hurts.


Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Ya know what? You are so full of self-righteous s*it!  You do not get to decide what I (or anybody else, for that matter) does with her body.  I exercised control over my body and fertility.  I exercised my 14th Amendment right.  So STFU!

Quoting Koltie6:

If your not responsible enough then you shouldn't be having sex at all. Abortion should not be used for birth control. Too bad they don't teach common sense and good judgement in college!





Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Exactly, the majority of women who obtain abortions do not regret it at all.  They see it as a positive decision.  When I had my abortion, I was just out of college, broke, unemployed and unable to support myself, let alone a child.  I did not regret my decision then, I felt only relief afterward.  I never felt guilt either.

Quoting IhartU:

 One-sided and meant to make it look like the majority of women regret it and are emotionally scarred by it.



 Those women who wrote they had regrets obviously do and they NEED to talk about it which is why they wrote in. Maybe those who are perfectly okay with their decision have moved on and have no reason to dwell on it and tell their story.








KamWorthy
by Silver Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:40 AM
1 mom liked this
There was also a little, unknown study done. The surveyors ( who were homosexual ) were asked if they were molested before the age of 13. They majority said they were not. The study was done in a completely different location, same question, the majority said they had been molested before the age of 13. Have you ever heard the saying "1/2 of men masturbate, the other half lie about it". That's all these studies are.
Quoting PinkButterfly66:

There was a survey done, it is quite public and that was the finding.  The majority of surveyors who had abortions DID NOT regret the decision at all.  Look it up.

Quoting 12hellokitty:


Who are you to speak for how the majority of women feel after having an abortion?

Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Exactly, the majority of women who obtain abortions do not regret it at all.  They see it as a positive decision.  When I had my abortion, I was just out of college, broke, unemployed and unable to support myself, let alone a child.  I did not regret my decision then, I felt only relief afterward.  I never felt guilt either.

Quoting IhartU:

 One-sided and meant to make it look like the majority of women regret it and are emotionally scarred by it.

 Those women who wrote they had regrets obviously do and they NEED to talk about it which is why they wrote in. Maybe those who are perfectly okay with their decision have moved on and have no reason to dwell on it and tell their story.





LoveMyBoyK
by Ruby Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:40 AM
2 moms liked this
source for your claim that the majority do not regret it, please? Regardless, the OP offers hope to women who DO regret it.


Quoting PinkButterfly66:

Exactly, the majority of women who obtain abortions do not regret it at all.  They see it as a positive decision.  When I had my abortion, I was just out of college, broke, unemployed and unable to support myself, let alone a child.  I did not regret my decision then, I felt only relief afterward.  I never felt guilt either.

Quoting IhartU:

 One-sided and meant to make it look like the majority of women regret it and are emotionally scarred by it.


 Those women who wrote they had regrets obviously do and they NEED to talk about it which is why they wrote in. Maybe those who are perfectly okay with their decision have moved on and have no reason to dwell on it and tell their story.



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LoveMyBoyK
by Ruby Member on Mar. 12, 2013 at 10:41 AM
How do you know there were other Options?


Quoting KamWorthy:

Anytime you hear someone say they don't regret killing a harmless, innocent life, run away from that person. You will never be able to trust them. Feeling no regret for taking a life when their were other options, is a sign of sociopathic behavior.




Quoting candlegal:

I thought so too when I read that.

Quoting Koltie6:

That's a tragedy! Wow!





Quoting littlelamb303:

no one I know that had an abortion regrets it.





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