Why is a woman who gives a child up for adoption

[Paperfishies]

Some kind of selfless, amazing, strong human being...but a man who wants nothing to do with his child and doesn't pay child support considered a dead beat loser?

Why the double standard?

[turtle68]

 I think it has a lot to do with growing the baby...having a physical link to that being.

A man is disconnected.

[KristenFowles]

Well... The mother who gives the child up for adoption is signing over rights to other parents.. Who will now support, and parent the child.

So it is a bit different...

[Rlmama00]

Because women hold all the cards in that situation. It's the woman's body, so she can choose to abort, keep the baby whether or not she is emotionally or financially prepared, or give the baby to a family that can take better care of him/her. Once the child is created by both people, the man isn't given as many options.

[LiliMama18]

Because a baby can bring an adoption agency $30k a pop, so the agencies spew this rhetoric and spend lots o' money to propagate said rhetoric.

[poietes]

I agree, it has to do with golden uterus syndrome.

[..MoonShine..]

Kinda like...when a mom does mom things, that's what she's supposed to do, but when a dad spends time being a dad...OMGs he's AMAZING!!! Why is this something fathers should be praised for and not something just expected of them?

[mommyrebecca]

Mother is doing best for herself and child. She does not say "here's my baby raise him cause i gotta go play video games or screw more guys or hang with friends so bye " she is giving her child a better chance at life and herself more growing up time. A father who walks out and doesn't support his child, should have just masterbated or made sure pregnancy wouldn't happen.. And some almost all birth moms seek out their children and try explain though hardly does anyone understand why adoption was good for a child.

---- i got kicked out of my mother's had no place to go. I've survived on the street before but I had a 3mo old w/ me. He is now 2yrs old with another family and their last name. Happier than ever. I didn't get a place til he was 1yr old. I gave him a life. A better life. Food in his belly, a mommy with a good life, roof over his head. I see him now and it does hurt a lot but he is very happy. His dad as well ditched out even when we had been kicked out and needed his help, he gave us his back side.

So you are saying mothers who do best are as low as jerk fathers who wouldn't protect from a pregnancy??

[Bookwormy]

I think that the anti-privacy (anti-choice/pro-life) movement has made martyrs of these women. Sure, some are.  Some ar just following their faith.  I don't think placing a baby for adoption is better or worse than abortion. I do think it is better than abuse.

[Paperfishies]

I think for the most part the women are the same. A man who walks away from being a parent is no different than a woman who walks away from being a parent.

Quoting mommyrebecca:

Mother is doing best for herself and child. She does not say "here's my baby raise him cause i gotta go play video games or screw more guys or hang with friends so bye " she is giving her child a better chance at life and herself more growing up time. A father who walks out and doesn't support his child, should have just masterbated or made sure pregnancy wouldn't happen.. And some almost all birth moms seek out their children and try explain though hardly does anyone understand why adoption was good for a child.



---- i got kicked out of my mother's had no place to go. I've survived on the street before but I had a 3mo old w/ me. He is now 2yrs old with another family and their last name. Happier than ever. I didn't get a place til he was 1yr old. I gave him a life. A better life. Food in his belly, a mommy with a good life, roof over his head. I see him now and it does hurt a lot but he is very happy. His dad as well ditched out even when we had been kicked out and needed his help, he gave us his back side.



So you are saying mothers who do best are as low as jerk fathers who wouldn't protect from a pregnancy??

[adopteeme]

Quoting LiliMama18:

Because a baby can bring an adoption agency $30k a pop, so the agencies spew this rhetoric and spend lots o' money to propagate said rhetoric.

Agree.
When a mother or father walk off the job with no intent to return - its abandonment.

The industry polishes it up. Society LOVES legalized abandonment...till the deed is done.
Then BM's are criticized just as harshly as the father that ran off to play video games.
And dad doesn't get compensated with maternity clothes, rent $, utilities, ect